Decisions Decisions.

<p>I'll start at the beginning.
In middle school I was in a high school credit/honors STEM program, I didn't much care about my grades, and I struggled with yet undiagnosed metal disorders, so though I was capable of doing the work, my grades were low for the most part.
Despite this, I was accepted into the IB program at a local high school (Plant). I tried to kill myself the first week of school. I missed a ton of days, was socially withdrawn and isolated and ending up withdrawing before the first nine weeks was over, receiving "incomplete" for all my grades. After this, it was decided that I would enroll in a less stressing program at a different high school. However, I got a computer and the plan changed to doing online classes with FLVS. I was horrid at it. It was terribly hard for me to keep focus on the computer, and some of the assignments were absolutely ridiculous. So I stopped doing anything productive at all in my life. I gained twenty pounds and spent most of my time sleeping, eating, or just wasting my time on the internet. I disgusted myself, I hated the feeling that I wasn't normal.
I had these feelings despite being on antidepressants. I missed a psychiatrist appointment, and was without my pills for the net three months. The feelings of not being normal continued to grow. I insisted on enrolling in Plant again. I insisted that I could do it this time, be normal, get good grades, socialize. But I couldn't. I was extremely shy, and socially awkward. I sat by myself at lunch for 4 and a half weeks. I was scrapping by on C, D and F grades, talking to only a handful of people. Sometimes almost having panic attacks at lunch. So again I withdrew.
Fast-forward to now. Homeschooling on workbooks and books from the library. My mom doesn't really like it. She doesn't understand.
I have a couple of options, and this is where you guys come in. I need your help and advice.
I can continue homeschooling, eventually make my own diploma and transcript, and hope to be accepted to either University of Tampa, or USF.
OR.
I can get my GED, get an associates degree at HCC, and then transfer to either of those schools.
I don't know what to do.
I like the GED plan, I was very positive about it, but my Yale educated (albeit bi-polar, and sometimes a drunk, who with his education, has become a waiter) says that an associate degree (in aquaculture) from HCC would be the equivalent to marine biology 101 at any real college. He says I wont know anything, and wont be prepared come time when I enroll In a higher university. </p>

<p>What should I do?
I don't know anyone to ask.
Thank you for you help.</p>

<p>How old are you right now? What grade would you be in if you were in a traditional high school?</p>

<p>I don’t like either of these ideas. I personally believe that you need to deal with your mental illness before you can worry about school. Maybe pop over to the parents forum for assistance, because I know many of them have had depressed children. </p>

<p>I’m a junior right now, sophomore year I was hospitalized for depression for a short time. Luckily, I was diagnosed and am now in treatment, which has worked. However, it does not sound like you’ve reached that point. I am so much happier and more well adjusted now that I have dealt with the issues i felt inside, and no one deserves to be stuck in a state of mental illness.</p>

<p>Since your mental illness seems to have reached a point of debilitation, it is imperative that you are seeing a psychiatrist AND a psychologist. In addition, I think you should seriously consider inpatient treatment or a therapeutic boarding school. I tend to think the boarding school route may be better, because you will be surrounded by other kids also working through issues, and you will have a chance to try to interact with people more normally.</p>

<p>I don’t think education is a priority here-- your health is. You still have not demonstrated that you are comfortable in a social/real world setting. Work on that, and then figure out what you are going to do for schooling. I think that the GED/Community College plan is a better one, because it gives you time to get better first and then assimilate into a college environment on a smaller scale before being thrown into a dorm situation.</p>