A year ago I received an invitation from the head of Counseling Services to join other faculty and administrators, at the university I’m associated with, for discussions about how to deal with the decline in resilience among students. At the first meeting, we learned that emergency calls to Counseling had more than doubled over the past five years. Students are increasingly seeking help for, and apparently having emotional crises over, problems of everyday life. Recent examples mentioned included a student who felt traumatized because her roommate had called her a “bitch” and two students who had sought counseling because they had seen a mouse in their off-campus apartment. The latter two also called the police, who kindly arrived and set a mousetrap for them.
What’s sad is that the current crop of kids have been created by parents who only wanted them to be successful, but who have actually harmed and lowered their chances of “success” and happiness.
I think it’s the difference between Boomer parenting style (and the very, very tail-end of the Boomlet kids are finishing up college) and the Gen-X parents.
Maybe need hasnt increased but rather willingness to reach out. As mental illness becomes less stigmatized, more people are willing to admit that they need help.
Will that increase the number of “silly” cases? Yes probably.
Other macro indicators of resiliency such as suicide rates haven’t changed much in the last few decades. I’d take that statistic over traffic to a counseling center any day.
I think the prolific use of social media has had a huge negative impact on this current crop of college/pre-college kids. I have seen w/ my youngest, especially, how much they all thrive on “drama”. It’s like they are competing with each other. And they now have large numbers of people to react to it.
At one point, I think a third of my daughter’s class was in therapy! So I can see how even minor issues have these kids blowing it all out of proportion and running for assistance.
My wife and I have discussed this a lot (we just sent our first to college). We both agree that we have probably failed S1 in several ways b/c we are “typical” Gen-X parents who coddled our first-born too much, and did not force him to solve his own problems enough. Unfortunately S2, who is still in middle school, will likely see some “adjustments” by us to better prepare him for reality.
Then again, we are shocked and surprised about how S1 appears to be thriving in his first month away - he’s taking care of his classwork, having great social interactions, talking to profs when he has a question or issue, and joining all sorts of ECs in which he is interested. The jury is still out long-term, but it appears underneath it all, we must have done something right (either that or he’s so repulsed by us he moved across the country from us so he can thrive…).
** AND?! ** What’s your point? Good for them for getting the help they needed.
I’d wager that a third of my K-8 class was on asthma meds and no one seemed to find an issue with that.
I’ve been in and out of therapy, on and off anti-depressants, since I was in my early teens. I did not have anything resembling coddling parents- though I did have ones that were quick to recognize that their child was ill and got me into therapy (for depression, for asthma, etc).
This is NOT NEW, people. I work with the history of medicine. I am the manager of a project which possesses well over 20,000 patient records from the first half of the 20th century. Well over a quarter of the people who were institutionalized were committed for “Manic Depression- Depressive Type” aka depression (Manic Depression then is not what we think of it as now). The difference between then and now is A- people were institutionalized rather than treated and B- they didn’t talk about it back then after (if) they were released.
Another article on the dangers of helicopter parenting and the lack of grit in college students with no data - just anecdotes. Seems to be a popular topic these days. Signals a real lack of creativity and rigor in the psychological field.
College faculty overwhelmed by students who care about their grades? My professors complained about us not coming to office hours. College counseling centers overwhelmed by people seeking counseling? Ummm? Honestly, it sounds like some profeesors and counselors who lack grit.
Just focusing on the aspects about seeking counseling for usual stresses…
It’s not declining student resilience. Here at NU, we are encouraged to seek help and find someone to talk to. It’s there. We paid for it, so why not use it? Even for day to day, ordinary struggles? In addition, waiting until something goes wrong is the wrong mentality. We shouldn’t wait until we are in a state of depression to go and seek help. That’s not what mental health is. When you have a car, do you wait until you have zero gas in your tank to go to the station? Of course not. You fill up before your empty. Or you get a tune up before you completely collapse. The real problem is that people in general, adults and students alike are afraid or embarrassed to seek help and acknowledge that they are not invincible. This is just an example of that.
So what? More people need to be open and willing to seek help. 1/4 of Northwestern students use CAPS, which is our counseling service. The school encourages it because 1. Students are paying for it. 2. They want a mentally healthy and sound student body and 3. they understand that counseling and therapy is not just for people with diagnosed mental illnesses.
I think this is exactly right. I speak from experience, since all three of my kids have been in therapy. When I think back on my high school days, it would have been very helpful for ME to have gotten help - I got stomach aches constantly, and missed a LOT of school. Another friend said his wife developed a bleeding ulcer in 7th grade! When I was that age, though, nobody ever thought to ask for help. I am VERY glad my kids are getting the help they need. I don’t apologize for it at all. I don’t think we treated them as precious snowflakes, either.
Another factor may be that a larger proportion of young people are attending college now, including those who are not particularly resilient.
A generation ago, a young person who was not resilient might have opted not to go to college. Today, college is the norm, even for young people are are not very resilient or who have diagnosed mental health problems.
I think we may be confounding two different phenomena. As many have already pointed out, the rise in counseling visits may simply reflect the positive situation that young people are less adverse to treatment for mental health concerns. The anecdotal decrease in independence of college students, their need to text/phone parents multiple times a day, their inability to problem-solve (handling a mouse in your apartment, etc.) may be a result of the change in parenting style over the last 20 years.
Not sure if there a correlation between chores, or lack thereof, and resilience-- but, very few of my girls peers had an active role in taking responsibility for shared household responsibilities. Many act as they are high-end-consultants, that is to say, I only concentrate on my studies and activities, and nothing else. Another item , that I have noticed is very young folks being over medicated or having an over-reliance on medication at very early ages. While in some instances legitimate, taking drugs mitigates your coping mechanisms and sets out a life long pattern of looking towards medication for answers. Most PhDs/MDs will tell you that you can achieve many of the same results, and make it sustainable, with CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy).
We all have phobias. I have a thing about mice and D2 has a thing about bugs.
I thought I saw a very tiny mouse run across my kitchen floor. I called my super, screamed into the phone, and he was in my apartment in less than a minute. He must have thought someone died in my apartment. I didn’t let him leave until he insulated and plugged every hole in my apartment. D2 saw few flying bugs in her room one night, she didn’t sleep all night and when she did she had nightmares.
I personally hate all these discussions about this generation is this, and this generation is that. At the end of day every generation experiences hardship of what’s relevant to them.