The other day I reread the essay and actually liked it. Today I read it again and hated it. She’s already sent out a handful of apps, but I was wondering if she can write a better common app essay and send it to the other schools on her list. The problem is that she and my husband are DONE talking about that particular essay. Ugh. I used to be like this when I was in college and had to write papers. I have to look over this thread again, since it helped put things into perspective.
At a certain point, @citymama9, I find comfort in telling myself something is in the hands of the fates. In fact, when D1 submitted, I told her, “You did your best, now it’s in their (adcoms’) hands.”
And I said my philosophy is about helping the kid feel confident she did what she could. Then, if things don’t work with some oclleges, she isn’t beating herself up, drooping from the “if only I had done this or that differently.” You cannot second guess. Truly, it is now in the adcoms’ hands. Best wishes.
@lookingforward Great advice! Fortunately, I share all my essay concerns with my husband and not my daughter. She has enough on her plate. My poor husband though. I’m driving him crazy, because I’m such a perfectionist. Thank you for your good wishes and good advice:)
I think @turtletime hit the nail on the head about laying it all out there for judgement is incredibly stressful. I hate to admit that for my kid I added a lot of stress by harping about the low admit numbers, which led to an expectation of perfection, which led to essay paralysis. In retrospect I think talking about her strengths and giving her a confidence boost would have been more valuable. @citymama9 that doesn’t sound like your issue, but I wanted to share my experience that sometimes good enough really is good enough, and that it’s really important to give them a confidence boost at a time when they are feeling very judged.
My kids all wrote about their childhoods. One wrote about Legos, one about muffins etc… So many kids write about such meaningful topics. I really feel our house had less stress because the topics were so ordinary 
I really felt fine as long as their essays weren’t going to hurt their applications. I never considered that they might help, only that they “do no harm”!
I read two of them after submission and read one of them beforehand at my kid’s request. It was hard not reading them at the time ! Now it’s a blip, barely remember. I had the impression that essays had little impact on admission, frankly.
My DH (English and composition professor) didn’t like it much, but I felt it was really strong, in that it answered the question “how would this kid fit into this campus, and what would she bring to the table?” My kid’s common app essay got her early writes to Williams and Smith, and got her off her wait list college. Her WL AO met her and told her “I’ve been rooting for you since I read your essay.”
You’ve heard from 5 schools so far? How is that possible? When did your child apply?
It’s been really hard to do the supplemental essays for colleges where there’s a smaller word limit, like 250-350 words. DS’s writing is pretty good but not exactly succinct.
@sschickens I wish. No, D has pushed the send button on the Common App for 5 schools already. Of course, she hasn’t gotten responses yet.
Carlson, as I wrote elsewhere, an occasional, rare, outstanding essay can be a factor for admission (and clearly your kid’s essay was one of these, congratulations). And some are so bad that they are a factor for rejection. But most just need to be good enough to achieve a neutral effect. There is so much coaching going on, and colleges know that. That is why authenticity of voice is so important, and any adult tampering is easy enough to spot.
I did not like my S18’s Common App essay. He is an OK writer, technically good but has difficulty really saying anything of substance. His CA essay told of an event from long ago and the essay itself was very superficial. He had no help on it, since our English teachers have enough on their plates trying to get other students to manage the grammar aspect.
Some of his supplemental essays were better.
Last year I started a thread “Mediocre college essay success stories?” hoping to hear that it didn’t really matter that much:)
I don’t know if it did, or didn’t. S was not accepted everywhere, and was not selected to advance in any super-competitive merit aid competitions even though he had tippy top stats. He also had no hooks, and some of the scholarship committees were looking for particular students (based on essay topics).
My DD essays were good except for the last one she wrote with no help or critique from me. It was exceptional and based on feedback she got from her classmates…it was definitely the essay (of the four) that got her admitted. Just an anecdote.
I think for the majority of schools this is true. But for the highly competitive schools, where admissions officers have to deny many perfect stats kinds of kids, the essay becomes more important, a way to stand out, make an impression, and allow the admissions committee to admit a person not just a stat. And if a school has a supplemental essay, that one is probably more important that the common app essay.
My D, a strong student and excellent writer, wrote what I thought was a breathtakingly levelheaded Common App essay (apologies to J. D. Salinger). But I really liked a couple of her supplementals.
My S, who is bright but not a strong student and also a reluctant writer, blew me away with his Common App essay. The only help he needed was reducing the word count, which was a shock for a kid who did not like to write and usually had to pad his high school assignments to meet the minimum assigned length.
I agree that for most kids and for most schools, a decently composed piece that makes them seem like someone who will be a net positive on campus is all that’s needed.
Both of my kids allowed me to read their CA essays and I think they both did a nice job. My D17’s topic was not about academics at all, but about coaching. My S19 also wrote a non-academic essay, about an aspect of a sport that is important to him and how he has learned from it. D17’s supplementals must have all been pretty good. She went 8/10 in her admission cycle–accepted to top 4 state universities and is attending one of them. Going through it the second time, I feel confident that my son will have good choices and will end up at the right place for him. But I’m not going to lie–I’ll be happy when all essays are done and his applications are complete. Oh, and on March 31, when he will know all of his options.
To bring this back to reality, unless those giving advice here are current adcoms who review college essays, most of the feedback is speculation, at best and many essays that “worked” were neutral or the applicant got in “in spite of” of the essays, not because of it. No one really knows unless they get direct feedback from the adcoms.
@socaldad2002 I’ll take what I can get at this point:)
Remember the kid who got into Stanford by filling his essay space with #BlackLivesMatter 100 times? This kid, in my recollection, had a very impressive application that he’d have been accepted to any top schools in spite of the “essay.” Now, if someone else with a less than stellar application had filled the essay space with the same hashtag 100 times, I’d highly doubt the same admission results.
You crack me up! My daughter did not do her essay yet, but I am sure it will be just ok. She is very smart and has the grades, blah,blah,blah, but her grammar and punctuation is not the greatest. She’s totally stressing me out with getting the applications done! I wanted them in a few weeks ago!
@citymama9 “I’ll take what I can get at this point”
But if the advice is actually neutral or wrong you might be going down the wrong essay path. I think CC gives some wonderful insight into many aspects of college admissions but with this particular topic it’s majnly anecdotal and speculation. Try to talk with actual adcoms who visit your HS or are at the target college campus to get the best advice on college essays.