<p>If they did how did they get there? I've seen a lot of people on tv mentioning their hectic schedules due to shuttling their kids back and forth from soccer practice or gymnastics or the like.</p>
<p>How did you manage it?</p>
<p>When I was in school, my parent's worked until 4 pm (and didn't get home until closer to 5). I rode the bus to school in the morning and rode the bus home in the evening. I lived too far away to walk.</p>
<p>Thing is, my parents were never very willing to take me back into town after they got home. I did participate in Taekwondo for a while, but the instructor never dismissed the class on time (which upset my parents). </p>
<p>Thing is. I don't blame them. They worked all day, and just wanted to rest. I can understand that. What I don't understand is how did everyone else do it?</p>
<p>I worked full time but my work day ended about 4:30. Our kids did ONE after school activity at a time. When they wanted to join children’s chorus, they both had to quit dance. </p>
<p>The secret to after school activities is having an awesome carpool group. We had one and actually became good friends over the many years our kids shared rides.</p>
<p>I have three kids, and all were able to participate in multiple after school activities. I have been lucky enough to be able to stay at home, so I have driven many miles of carpools through the years.</p>
<p>I do have family and friends whose kids have been unable to participate in weekday afterschool activities because of a lack of transportation. Both parents commuting in different directions using combinations of car, train and metro (DC area). It makes my head spin to contemplate it.</p>
<p>35 plus years ago when DH and I were in high school, our (different) midwestern school districts ran late buses for kids participating in afterschool activities. I don’t know of any districts still able to provide these services.</p>
<p>In elementary school, after-school activities were limited to the after school clubs that stayed open until 5 or 6 when we came home. In jr high, DS was able to take dance after school by walking there and then home. We were lucky that sports wasn’t a huge deal for him. </p>
<p>In hs, DS was in everything. I had a more flexible schedule, but mainly he filled up his day with activities so that he wouldn’t be done until a parent was available. Weekends we either carpooled or chauffeured him around (a lot). </p>
<p>This is where you can often see the economic advantages of the average CC parent. Not a good or bad statement, but many on here are wealthy and motivated to give kids every advantage. In our family, we sacrificed some ECs (like golf) because of transportation and expenses.</p>
<p>I was a part time employee until my youngest finished 7th grade and oldest finished 10th grade, so the earlier years were easy & I helped a lot of people out with rides along the way. My full time job was/is fairly flexible so the next year was easy, then D1 drove them both her senior year. The past two years have been tougher for D2, but she’s found rides with friends and/or their parents, many of whom we carpooled with in the past.</p>
<p>It doesn’t hurt that DH & I were coaches/managers/leaders for many of their activities in the past so softball, Girl Scouts etc. had schedules that we were in charge of. And we’ve done a lot of “if you take them, we’ll pick up.” In terms of the karmic balance, I’m pretty sure we’re still owed a lot of rides ;)</p>
<p>Carpooling, working at home, and a school within walking distance (which was a deliberate choice). My kids didn’t do a huge amount. My older son did Academic Team - I often drove members of the team on weekends. Science Olympiad met once a week except at crunch time. His main activity was working on the computer at home. Younger son did orchestra before school - my husband drove him on his way into work. He also did Science Olympiad and the literary magazine and walked home or got rides.</p>
<p>I stayed in a job I loved that paid less but gave me hours that made driving my kids to EC’s where no car pool existed possible. My kids were scheduled to the hilt with everything they expressed an interest in at a young age, we started weeding the activities as the time commitment for so many things became unmanageable for them. Some things went away after a year or two in elementary school, others (piano) lasted from kindergarted to college.</p>
<p>I grew up in a situation much like OP’s and I resented the small town that made driving to virtually anything “too much” either in time or money for my parents. I did become very adept at amusing myself in constructive ways as a kid but I was determined to let my kids have more exposure to activities so they did everything from chess club, violin, ballet and swimming to japanse sword training. I don’t regret any of the time I spent at poolside or rehersal hall but I realize how much these sorts of opportunities depend on things other than the kids interest and ability. The playing field is far from equal when it comes to EC’s and I think it’s one of the reasons they are valued so much in college admissions - it’s a measure of a families ability, and willingness, to sacrifice and pay for their children’s opportunities.</p>
<p>I personally grew up in a city with excellent public transportation so I took myself to all of my after school activities. My parents paid for (a lot of) them, but never actually went with me to anything that I can recall. Drama and voice lessons, sports, work…all walking or subway or bus.</p>
<p>My own kids live in a very walkable small town (and we deliberately chose the downtown part of it so the kids could have a walk/bike lifestyle) so for some things (getting to work, school), they can walk or bike safely and I don’t have to take them. </p>
<p>I do work at home so have been able to cover the relatively few activities that require driving (club vball in a neighboring town for my D, for example). For those we also make use of car pools.</p>
<p>I was a stay at home parent mostly and when I did start working again, I worked from home mostly. We did a lot of carpooling, kids riding bikes, etc. Now they drive themselves but we are busy watching their various contests, etc. If you have more than one child, it just gets busy even with each child in one activity.</p>
<p>My son did youth soccer, one or two years of youth basketball and then youth lacrosse when he was in elementary and middle school. We only allowed one sport/activity at a time, so that was his fall/winter/spring schedule. Practices were once a week and always after 5pm so either I took him (I am a SAHM) or DH left work early. Games were the same times or on the weekends - except basketball games during the week were later (7ish - 8ish.) He wasn’t particularly interested in any of these sports so we didn’t have to do anything more than the bare minimum. His real sport is sailing which he started at 7 when he went to camp. Since we don’t have a boat or live on a lake, summer at camp was the only time he could sail, and we didn’t have to be any more involved than writing a check. He sails now on his college’s club team.</p>
<p>He dropped all the team sports in high school and switched to XC in fall and track in spring and was also on the Masterminds team his jr. and sr. year, plus Symphonic and Jazz Band. He was at a private school about 15 miles from home and with kids from all over the area so carpooling never worked out and I had to pick him up 5 days a week. I was very happy once he got his license and I no longer had to drive him (one of us had to drive him in the morning, too, as band practices were before school and before our district’s bus got to the school too late for band. )</p>
<p>I had a baby sitter that became a “kid driver” as my kids got older. By that time sitter was a grandmother who brought her grands with her, driving my kids around. ASAP, they were driving themselves, which is common in my community. There was six months when the sitter was long gone, the oldest had graduated HS and gone out of state and was unavailable to shuttle younger around, but younger was two young to drive. I was fortunate enough to be able to schedule time to pick him up and drop him off on occasion, but that was pretty crazy. He learned to drive and used the car the kids shared just as soon as it was an option.</p>
<p>He also did a lot of bicycling during that time. We live in a fairly small town, and he could get most places within an hour.</p>
<p>I’m fortunate to have a job with flexible hours, so for years I scheduled myself to come in early and leave in time to do the after-school thing with the kids (DH did the early shift - he got pretty good at little girl hairstyles over the years). Timing was a factor in selection of elementary schools, since the schools here can begin any time between 7:30 and 9:00, so we knew we couldn’t move to certain neighborhoods and continue our schedule.</p>
<p>I really envy those with family living nearby. We were pretty much on our own, although a circle of friends and neighbors provided support for one another when we could. </p>
<p>I keep remembering a four-year-old we once met at violin class … which she attended in between her morning French class and before her afternoon tennis lesson. The poor kid looked simply exhausted; I gather that her days were filled with running from enriching activity to enriching activity.</p>
<p>Part of being a parent is being tired. We make choices. I remember driving my kid to sports, and closing my eyes in the car for an hour. Or reading. </p>
<p>Yes parents are tired, but we give of our time, when we can, to our children. It’s part of the choices we make when we have kids. Thenpayout is great.</p>
<p>So your parents won’t take you anywhere after school? Or pick you up later?</p>
<p>I was the taxi. Worked part time, drove our sons to and from baseball practice, chorus, soccer, theater. I also made the costumes for the cast year after year for the school play (volunteer).</p>
<p>It was fun but I was exhausted much of the time. Now looking back, I’m so glad I was so heavily involved. I didn’t miss anything and I have no regrets.</p>
<p>My kids went to a K-12 independent school with no bus service to our neighborhood. So both were always at the same school, and we had to go pick up sometime in the afternoon anyway. Both did quite a few after school activities, and we just picked 'em up around 5:30 - 6:00 (or after their games if it was a sport).</p>
<p>Of course. It is a part of a good American education. Not all learning takes place during school hours. Some of the most challenging hours take place on academic teams and in other areas after formal class hours are done.</p>
<p>We lived 1/2 mile from the middle school and 1 mile (opposite direction) from the good public HS. Walking was always an option, although picking son up from CC practice around 5 pm was done tired andnother mile up and down hill…). Son is gifted and was involved in music, sports and academic teams every week (most music during school hours). He managed to get his daily runs in and still participate in other clubs during the off season (and during them- not sure how he did it, teenage boys don’t divulge details but we do know he was doing school activities and not goofing off/at friends’ then). It was nice to be able to drop him off for concerts at the early required time and return later for the performance. Did my share of attending away CC meets, but it wasn’t necessary. He generally found some club activity and after school running to occupy him every day of every week fall-winter-spring in HS. We did consider proximity to schools when choosing where to live. Another good public middle/HS combination and neighborhood convenient for work would have involved school buses, 15-20 minute or longer car trips one way so we rejected that. Middle sized cities have their advantages.</p>
<p>It is important for smart students- gifted and bright- to have more to do to occupy their minds and time than just classes and homework. Family finances may dictate which after school activites are chosen, but once in HS studentsd need to be able to participate in clubs, sports and other school related functions. They are an integral part of a good American education. Public schools can offer a tremendous amount of extras to keep bright minds occupied.</p>
<p>It’s all about choices. H and I chose to be ‘poor’ so I could stay home with our kids when they were young. I drove the preschool car pool both ways each day. H chose jobs without travel so he could be here when the kids were growing up. We made sure we offered rides to any kids needing them. Occasionally we had to rely on friends to drop our kids off after a practice. H coached when the kids were younger. That made me the team manager… Our two kids did a lot - soccer, basketball, hockey, golf, tennis, baseball, chess club, theater, snowboarding, math team, church choir, church youth group, volunteering. We drove a lot and rarely missed a game/event. Both kids are grown now and we really miss that time. Some of our best conversations took place in the car. We’re still ‘poor’ but so very, very rich. And the minute I could, I gave up my minivan.:)</p>
<p>I had the time so I ended up doing aafter school/summer stuff for others. For those who can’t get off work- find a way to let your child be involved. Young kids will have day care after school activities. Older kids through the school. Being a parent is more than providing food and shelter, or the money for it. I had retired from work but physician H arranged call schedules around meets and concerts as often as he could. It’s a matter of choices and priorities. Money is no substitute for daily enrichment with local peers (vacations to places are in addition to after school involvement).</p>
<p>Back in my childhood we didn’t have money and most families didn’t have two cars, plus most women didn’t work outside the home. I remember hauling a bassoon home nearly two miles up and down hills after an activity- the school bus stop was a block or two further from the HS in my home town (to be the 2 miles for funding).</p>
<p>My mother raised me by herself, and I did a lot of stuff after-school.</p>
<p>During my younger days, until 3rd grade ended, I had a babysitter who was a family friend. If my mother was working, that babysitter would pick me up from anything I needed. There were also other people (my aunts, my mother’s friend who I called my aunt, my grandfather, etc.) who were trusted enough to do this and watch me if needed. I spent a lot of time at my grandfather’s house, and at my best friend’s house right down the street (his parents would often half-joke that they should be paid for babysitting me because I was over there so much)</p>
<p>4th grade onwards, I was independent enough to be able to be home by myself for a couple hours at a time. In 7th grade, my grandmother began living with us because she couldn’t live by myself. But because of her health problems she hardly constituted a caretaker. In middle school, there was a wonderful thing called an “activity bus” that would drop students off at various locations around the county to help with after school activities. And luckily, one of those stops was a church only a mile away from my house. This armed me with the ability to stay after school in middle school essentially as much as I wanted.</p>
<p>Freshman year was hard as far as me being driven places. I was often at school later than I needed to be because my mother couldn’t pick me up earlier. By sophomore year however, I became acclimated to the art of getting rides from people. And then in junior year, I finally was able to drive to school, and karma came back and bit me because for the next 2 years I was the one driving people around.</p>
<p>One of us was always available to drive our kids. I worked from home for few years and H did after I went back to work full time. My mother was available to drive the kids if we were out of town. There were many nights when we sat at the ballet studio waiting for the kids to finish. It was tough when they were at different levels, sometimes it was multiple runs to the studio. The teacher had mercy on us, she pushed D2 up to D1’s level as soon as she could have.</p>
<p>Our kids went to a school that was half an hour away, and it had kids from all over the state, so we often had to drive them to their friend’s house which could be an hour away.</p>
<p>We were very happy once D1 started to drive.</p>