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<p>Do you really think that students at the top schools don’t party, consume alcohol or have sex? Have you never heard the mantra of “work hard, play hard”? :)</p>
<p>That said, you know better than anyone else whether UCLA or Berkeley are the best fits for you.</p>
<p>It would be hard to have more party-type fun in college and still learn stuff than I had at Yale. Things may have changed since then, but I sincerely doubt it. My daughter and I were there on Tap Night a few years back, and the whole place was a moving bacchanalia. Back in the day, Harvard was not known for great parties, but I went to some really good ones there, too.</p>
<p>I’m not saying Cal or UCLA may not be right for you, but you’re nuts if you think HYPS are grim and pressured. They’re not . . . not by a long shot. And Dartmouth? Hell, I had friends whose lives were ruined because of the intensity of their partying there.</p>
<p>'tis true that kids at top schools have fun. The OP should remember the well known comment about Harvard that the hardest thing is getting in. At elite schools, I think the student body rather quickly sorts out into two camps: Those whose prime goal is to maximize the learning, and those who look for work/life balance (to use a phrase from the job world). The former group likely plans to go to the top grad/professional schools, get IB/consulting jobs on grad and recognizes the cut-throat world post-college. The latter group recognizes that the cut-throat world has room for those who know how to live well. :)</p>
<p>Lively social scenes are so pervasive in colleges that one would need to hunt to find one lacking such a scene. Even reputedly serious schools like Chicago have lots of students who drink and party a good deal. (you should have heard the reports we got from our D her first year about dorm drunks!)</p>
<p>So please, OP do not think that elite private colleges are grim and serious. A few students are, just like Berkeley is famous for the rigor of some programs. I dare say the majority of students anywhere are in college for multiple reasons - education, yes, but fun too.</p>