<p>Is having a distant relationship with your roomate common? My roomate and I have very different backgrounds. To begin with, he is white and I am a hispanic international student. Also, he smokes occasionaly and drinks, both of which I can't stand. After classes, I go to my room and we basically conduct mainly small talk and part our different ways. I am a studious person as well and although he is a good student, he is not highly academically motivated. On top of that, he has his own group of friends and we definetily don't hang out together--did I mention we hold conflicting political views? So, our interaction is very practical(watching some tv shows/what did you do today?,etc), which is strange since I always though roomates were supposed to be best friends. Is anyone here in the same boat?</p>
<p>Yeah I guess I feel the same way. Roommates don't always mesh, especially when you are assigned one as a freshman, which happens at many colleges and universities. I have six roommates in my 5-room suite, and each of us really have our own circle of friends from our individual activities, classes, student clubs, etc. I don't think roommates always have to be friends, but I guess it is an added perk if you and your roommate(s) do have things in common. </p>
<p>Are you a freshman at your school?</p>
<p>Yeah, a lot of roommates aren't "best friends" though a lot are friends.</p>
<p>Your relationship with your roommate is basically the same as mine, we have essentially nothing in common and we have very different backgrounds. We rarely talk, the room is extremely quiet when just the two of us are in there. We've got different friends, different tastes, etc.
Good thing is that we get along well enough and don't have any qualms with each other, and he's a good roommate in that I can trust him. All the people I've met said that that's all that really matters, as long as you can get along with your roomie, even if you're not friends with him.</p>
<p>Exactly, its better that we can live with each other with no issues rather than having a situation where our habits and preferences conflict and we despise one another.</p>
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So, our interaction is very practical(watching some tv shows/what did you do today?,etc), which is strange since I always though roomates were supposed to be best friends.
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Sometimes roomates do become good friends, but what you have may be more typical. After all, you're rooming with a person matched up after maybe a few questions on the housing application. What's more important is that you treat each other with respect.</p>
<p>Sounds like what you have is probably the case for like 60% of college freshman. 20% probably hate their roommates and the other 20% are bffs...haha.</p>
<p>But you know, just because a person has different political views/is a different ethnicity/whatever shouldn't make them nonfriend material. My best friends are soooo different from me...that's what makes us a great group. But if you don't get along, you just don't get along...</p>
<p>My freshman daughter also has a distant relationship with her roommate so you are not alone. Before school she e-mailed her - no reply. When I met the roommate I thought she was one of the most spoiled teens I had ever met - her priority was buying a refrigerator, microwave and TV. Plus she talks to her boyfriend every night for 3+ hours.</p>
<p>They get along - but they have not become friends. My daughter knows of many students who have moved because of disagreements with their roommates. So it is a plus that you get along and do not have any major disagreements. Since he has his own group of friends and probably knew them at the beginning of school he had no need to make friends with you, his roommate.</p>
<p>I may be generalizing, but it seems students who attend a school where they know many other students and have friends appear clueless that their roommates who may be from a different state and/or different culture would benefit from the offer of friendship as the roommate might be the only person they know at the beginning of the school year.</p>
<p>yeah, i am a freshman at a big state school. My roommate is a polite person and I have had no problems with him so far. Thanks for the feedback everyone.</p>
<p>My roommate and I were pretty distant. We got along, but just never clicked. I don't know why, because we were different, but not that different. Anyway, she moved out to be with a friend, and now when we see each other, things are really awkward (the whole situation when she moved out was a little weird). But I have my own room now, which is kind of nice.</p>
<p>Relationships with roommates really do vary. I know a couple who are like best friends now, and quite a few more who are friends, but not that close. There are a lot of people with distant relationships, though, and some definitely don't get along.</p>
<p>It's something that's evolved over time, though. Most people at my school that I know didn't know very many other people when they came in. So most people at least tried to get along with their roommate at first. But I've heard several people say after Christmas break that they're really just not going to try to be friends anymore, and just let things be more distant.</p>
<p>it's definitely better to be distant than to hate each other...</p>
<p>I'd say that most of the roommates I know are friendly, but distant roommates are not something that I'd consider abnormal. Roommates who hate each other certainly shock me, while roommates who love each other are ho-hum news.</p>
<p>distant but dont hate each other. we're just on different schedules and ways of life. the only time we talk is when we have to.</p>
<p>It would kind of suck at first to have your roommate move out. I mean, I know it's not really a reflection of you as a person but yeah. I would feel like they hated me :P.</p>
<p>where does it say that you have to be best friends with your roomate?</p>
<p>it could help a lot.</p>
<p>^^ Most definitely.</p>
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It would kind of suck at first to have your roommate move out. I mean, I know it's not really a reflection of you as a person but yeah. I would feel like they hated me :P.
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<p>Yeah, she made sure that I knew it wasn't me personally why she moved, but the whole situation was just awkward. And now things have gotten even more awkward (through a couple of incidents), and she hardly acknowledges me at all when we pass by each other (which happens often, since she only moved a few doors down.) So yeah, you do kind of wonder what's wrong with you that she had to move out, even if you know that its not your fault.</p>
<p>Well, next year I'm rooming in an apartment with a couple of friends. Hopefully, that'll be much better!</p>
<p>I never talked to my roommate.</p>
<p>what?are you jokin?</p>
<p>i haven't met my roommate yet even though classes started yesterday. Her bf lives in the same city and drives to class, so i guess she's staying with him. But I still think it's weird that I haven't even seen her yet.</p>
<p>We live in a 2 bedroom, 4 person suite though, and I'm not friends with the other two girls either. We don't even say hi to each other when someone enters the suite. The other two are acting like BFF now though, and I always hear them talking from my room, but we haven't clicked all together. Even from the first day, one of them as acting like she didn't even like talking to me, so I just don't even bother to try now. I don't think our personalities will mesh well, because those two are like "anti party, study study study", and I like to have a little fun.</p>
<p>gemstar, which school do you go to? And yeah, gregory, can you elaborate on that? lol</p>