<p>You’re paying for him to be there, Mom2009. GO! He doesn’t get a say, lol! I agree with SWTCAT, he doesn’t realize that there’ll be few people to eat with that night because everyone will be off to dinner with their parents. My parents took “stragglers” out to dinner 4 years in a row because there’d always be a few kids who were sad their parents didn’t come up.</p>
<p>I went to family day for S’s freshman year. I was on the fence about attending until the email that said, ‘I’m not doing well in lab-- worse case scenario, I have to drop it and leave the program…’ THAT made me book the ticket.</p>
<p>Of course, by the time I got there 2 weeks later, the kid had talked to the prof., figured things out, and crisis was long over. </p>
<p>Although he didn’t need me, I enjoyed seeing S at home in his new niche, and meeting some of his new tribe. It was definitely worth the trip just for that-- especially seeing how happy he was.</p>
<p>Last week-end was my last parent’s week-end. We thought about not going but, at the last possible moment, we went. For the 4th time. 4 years of Sing! 4 years of a capella concerts by Lipstick on My Collar and Woolsocks. 4 years of Memphis barbeque. 4 years of campus comedy by Contents Under Pressure. 4 years in awe of one of the most beautiful campuses I have ever seen. </p>
<p>It was grand and I’ll miss it. Color me surprised.</p>
<p>Its called “Family Weekend” for a reason. We went to see our sophomore, 8 hours away. We had a great time hanging out and attending some of the activities. We went to 3 out of 4 for my older son. The one we missed was unavoidable. My kids never get sick of seeing us or so they say…shopping for clothes of course is their added bonus. If you can’t attend that’s alright, but you can’t keep me away!</p>
<p>We are just looking for an excuse to go visit. Last year S couldn’t get away with delivering himself to school for the first time so he insisted vehemently that we didn’t have to attend parent’s weekend 4 weeks later (I guess we would be infringing on his newly found freedoms). This year he insisted just as vehemently that he could deliver himself to school, so he did, but we are definitely going for parent’s weekend and he hasn’t objected (I guess he’s trading some of those new found freedoms for a couple of nice dinners and most importantly, a few hugs).</p>
<p>We went the first two years with S2. His school is a PAIN to get to, and has one small hotel nearby (which big donors get to stay in) Thus, we stay about 30-45 minutes away. We NEVER did any of the “Parents Weekend” activities, just spent time with our kid. Epiphany this year: we should visit when we can stay at the closer hotel, an take all his friends to dinner. For S2, who is a performer, we’ll go visit when he’s performing, which (at least this year) isn’t parents weekend!</p>
<p>Yes! We love visiting the campus, and with the school on the opposite coast, it’s the only chance we have. Plus our son is in an improv comedy group and the show they do during Parents’ Weekend is the only time we can see him perform. </p>
<p>However, this year we have a second child in college and had to make a choice. Because he’s a senior and we’ve been to three Parents’ Weekends, we are going to our daughter’s instead. </p>
<p>I’d say if at all possible, go. It connects you with the school and your child in a unique way.</p>
<p>With our D, we went to 3 out of 4 (we had a family party one year that conflicted with Parents Weekend and she came home). She was 6 hours away, so it was our only chance to see her during the year. She didn’t have a car, so we used that time to do errands, etc. It was also a good time to do the “seasonal clothes swap”…bring up the sweaters, take home the shorts. We did very little of the college-sponsored activities, but we enjoyed seeing her and taking a gang out to eat.</p>
<p>At S school, they only have Parents Weekend for freshman/sophomore parents. He’s a lot closer, but we went both years. We’ve enjoyed developing friendships with the parents of his friends.</p>
<p>We went freshman year for both children, and senior year for one. Thought going freshman year was a really helpful because it was nice to meet other parents and nice to see kids in their new environment. Senior year parents day was also a good opportunity to meet parents and friends in a more organized context than during our occasional visits for events, though those visits were fun as well. </p>
<p>Possibly parents weekend is something small schools do better than the large ones–at any rate at a small school you really do see people you know and feel a part of a community.</p>
<p>I’d certainly recommend going freshman year and then see what seems best for your family in subsequent years.</p>
<p>Yes, we do visit on parent weekends-but only for the dinner get together one evening-skipping any other events. Just got back from our last one and then will see everyone again in May for graduation. D is only 1 hour away and has the same crowd of 10 friends and parents that meet up each fall, with a few extra roommates and parents thrown in. We enjoy seeing her friends and meeting their families each year. Now that the students are in houses, we’ve been having large pot-luck dinners.</p>
<p>Our son’s university, 5 hours away, had a well planned parent weekend junior year-we enjoyed it. Also liked the fall football tail-gate parties with the roommates and families the other years. We all met again for a picnic/potluck at graduation.</p>
<p>Good fun.</p>
<p>Yes S is a jr this year and we plan to ‘drop by’. We usually take him to the local mall for some shopping and out to eat. This year I am sure the trip will include a visit to the grocery store as well since he lives off campus now. We look forward to it and he likes spending a few hours with us.</p>
<p>Yes, every year for older S and really glad we did - we got to know all of his friends and many of their parents well. Maybe as a result many of the boys have now stayed at our house multiple times over the years and we have loved having them here. </p>
<p>We plan to do the same for our younger son, but it’s a much bigger school and a very different vibe. I think we may end up visiting for random weekends instead of just parents weekend after this year. I didn’t get to meet his best buddies until I drove out with him for the beginning of sophomore year a few weeks ago.</p>
<p>Years ago there were no parents/family weekends at colleges. It is my understanding that they started in the fall (I think sometime in the 80’s) because of the freshman suicide rate. In my experience, most parents do visit freshman year, and in later years visit one or more times when something relevant is happening - a play, concert, sporting event, significant birthday, etc. Visiting at a time other than family weekend gives you a better feel for the campus and your kid’s friends and life on campus. Whether or not you should visit on family weekend depends entirely on your child and your relationship with him/her.</p>
<p>Not every year, we only attended the first year. D1’s college is less than 2 hours away and D2 does not have the patience to sit through a long football game every year.</p>
<p>We’ve done family weekends for the first two years for our 3 kids. H didn’t come along a few times, but I brought a grandmother instead, who loved the experience. We found that we didn’t do many of the official offerings after the first year - spent time off campus with the kids instead.</p>
<p>We always listen to D. If she says “No”, we do not “Jump in a car and go”. She has her reasons, and we respect them.</p>
<p>Our son spent his freshman year at a school that turned out to be a really bad fit for him and he knew it within weeks of being there, so he REALLY did not want us to come for family weekend. And we respected that, but in talking with my sister I happened to mention that among other things that would be happening that weekend was a reception with a MAJOR old time NFL star whom my bother-in-law grew up idolizing. So my bother-in-law drove 8 hours to do Parent’s weekend with my son. He took him to dinner, Target, they went fishing, AND BIL got to meet his idol. BIL says it was the best Christmas present he ever got. Son thought it was a hoot. BIL was able to confirm for us that son was right – it was a really bad fit and not just son being cranky. So it all worked out well, even if I wasn’t the family at family weekend.</p>
<p>We have always gone to family weekend - unfortunately both fall on the same weekend this year, so we are headed to the school of our younger child and will see the older one on a different weekend. But in general, it seems like a bit less of a disruption if we go on the dedicated weekend - other families are around campus and fewer other things to do(and friends to do them with) for the kids. With the exception of freshman year, we don’t do the planned activities, though. Another reason to go then is the timing - it comes on a good weekend as far as academics - after midterms but not too close to finals. One of the schools always sponsors a big name entertainer or concert for families (not free, you have to get tickets in advance)on that weekend -last year we saw plenty of families of upperclassmen as well as freshmen. It’s interesting that some schools are doing this kind of thing now. But with it being more expensive and/or logistically difficult for whole families to visit as opposed to kids going home, I’m sure that some schools are looking for any way to attract families to campus - they want people who are invested in the school and feel connected to it, so that they’ll encourage their students to like it(and stay for all four years, ie. retention) and for fundraising and so on in later years.</p>
<p>Got home yesterday from D1’s family weekend. She is a junior and acted excited that we would be coming. We attended family weekend her freshman and sophomore years and she spent all her free time with us then. This time we saw her a total of about 4 hours! We were irritated until we realized that after two tough years she is finally very happy and confident at her school. Next year we will either take a pass or prepare to do our own thing again.</p>
<p>Hell, yes, I’m going to parents’ weekend!!! I would not miss this for the world!!!</p>