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...people who put their kids in honors / AP classes. The environment is different, otherwise you'd keep your kids in regular level classes.
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<p>It got me thinking. Do you "put" your kids in classes? I am not referring to lower grades, just high school. </p>
<p>I have been asked for class selection advice by my kids before. Not by my older S as he basically chose what he wanted without my input, even petitioned to get into courses he wanted that he was not, on paper, "qualified" for. My D has asked my advice, I've even started a thread or two here to ask for advice from you guys in order to give her better advice. </p>
<p>But I have never chosen her classes, determined her course load, told her she will take X and not Y., never filled out her schedule. My thinking is my kids have to own their choices in this, the activity in which they spend the better part of their day for a few years, even if I give them my thoughts.</p>
<p>I have yet to interfere with their choices. I’ve given advice when asked, however.</p>
<p>That being said, I’ve pretty much expressed to both of my kids that they shouldn’t take another class with a specific teacher. But I wouldn’t “forbid” it.</p>
<p>In 8th grade we went over the choices together. At that time they make a four year plan (no obligation to stick to it, but it does insure they know what the graduation requirements are.) With the oldest there was some discussion with the high school about whether my son could take AP Comp Sci as a freshman. My dh went in with our son and met whoever it was that was going to make the decision. I know I didn’t have much to do with it, as I remember discussions like “The GC is making me take APUSH.” To which I replied “I think you should too, and here’s why.” Or another discussion about which level senior English to take. My son absolutely put his foot down about AP English, but almost got persuaded to be in honors. He negotiated that on his own. In the end he took an elective English class that year, he loved. It wasn’t very hard, but it was the first year he looked forward to English classes. </p>
<p>We did not “pick” our kids’ classes. But we did have some “discussions” with the school about their choices. For example, we declined to have our DD accelerated in math as an 8th grader (the first family EVER to do so). We also pushed for our son to be in Honors English in 10th grade. He had a teacher who refused to recommend him for it despite DS’s A in 9th grade English. We had to go to the principal on that one because the GC refused to advocate on our child’s behalf. We also requested that DS be removed from precalc as a senior and allowed to take statistics/economics instead. That also took administrator intervention.</p>
<p>With my oldest I left him alone until he was picking classes for senior year. He wanted to take AP’s in every class except band. I talked him out of the AP English lit by showing him that because he already was getting college credit for AP English Language he wasn’t going to get any college credit for it at the colleges he was looking at. So he didn’t take it. He thanked me later.:)</p>
<p>My 9th grader had to decide whether to take AP World History next year. I told him even though he qualified I wasn’t sure it was a good idea given how much work it would be . He decided to take it anyway…</p>
<p>In High School class levels were just determined by prior grades - so you did not pick the level - you got assigned it (if you disagreed there was a policy on how to proceed.) In terms of electives and senior year choices (where you had some options in math and science), we usually discussed it and my daughter picked what she thought she would enjoy (but again the electives available were very limited by scheduling constraints.) </p>
<p>It seems silly for me to “choose” my child’s classes. She can simply email the GC and get it changed immediately to whatever she wants. We talk about her choices; she knows my views. She sometimes chooses to ignore my opinion. </p>
<p>In other words, I’ve tried to choose her classes. It doesn’t work. I’ve since learned to trust her.</p>
<p>I’m not sure what that would mean at the high school level–are you thinking there are parents who just put their kids in classes without any discussion or consideration of their individual interests and talents? Hard to believe this would happen. </p>
<p>Yes, I plan my kids’ schedules, according to their interests, abilities, and our discussions. The middle schooler has twice refused to take classes I felt would be helpful for her. I explained why I thought they would be good for her, and she insisted she wanted to do other things. So, she didn’t take them. I’ve made a high school plan for her based on her interests and requests. We’ve gone over it together. She seems perfectly happy with it. I did the same for the older one. The older one opted to take a class which wasn’t in my plan (because I didn’t think would be that helpful for her, she kind of agrees, but wanted it anyhow), and also took on something else that was just too much academic overload in my opinion. She also made another schedule change on her own initiative that fixed an issue I hadn’t been able to address. Last year, she also added a class she wanted to do as an opportunity arose that we hadn’t planned for. I didn’t always like every change they made, but they weren’t too unreasonable. It’s their education and their life. I wouldn’t force them into something they really didn’t want.</p>
<p>I do not choose my kids’ HS classes, although I’ll give advice if asked (two of my kids ask, one never does). When kids are starting at our HS, the 8th grade teachers recommend what they think is the appropriate level for the child in each class. You can’t go above that level without a parent petitioning the department head and getting approval, and you similarly can’t go below “college prep” level without a teacher recommendation or a parent petition. My kids have always gone to the level recommended. After 9th grade, there are requirements (certain grades, prereqs or teacher recommendations) for getting into AP or honors classes. Again, my kids took honors if they were eligible but never pushed to get into an honors class if they didn’t meet the strict requirements. My youngest, who will be in 9th grade next year, is my most driven student. I can see her trying to bite off more than she can chew, and I will advise against that. The standard classes at our HS are fairly rigorous and GCs tend to advise most kids not to overload on AP/honors. Luckily, D3 is pretty good at considering advice.</p>
<p>Our kids’ school didn’t give them too many options as to what classes they could take. Once they were on a track they only had few electives to choose from. D2 was doing IB. She had questions about whether she should take high level math and physics vs English and History. I didn’t know what to tell her, so she actually consulted her private college counselor. I did ask her if she wanted to take photography because it wouldn’t be weighted as an honor course. She gave me a strange look.</p>
<p>I gave advice, but didn’t make them do anything. When my son wanted to take 7 AP classes senior year, I suggested he might not want to. He did, and took a night class at college too. When my younger son didn’t want to take AP Calc 2 as a senior, but AP stat instead, I asked him if he was sure. He’s now taking stat. I have suggested they take AP tests once they take the class too, but they haven’t always agreed. </p>
<p>If my husband and I didn’t intervene, DD would have taken - ceramics, foods, gym and required English. We insisted that she take a math class (and not the easy one that everyone passes just by showing up) and a science. We also did not allow her have less than a full class load. She ended up taking 2 sciences and begged us to let her drop the more difficult one; we refused. Thank goodness she got into a decent college.</p>
<p>My parents didn’t intervene, except for languages. We had to either take more than the required two years of a foreign language, or get into a pathway of electives. I went with Spanish for all four years, my sister is doing a horticulture pathway, my brother all the computer classes, and my older sister took two years of Spanish and one of French. Other than that, we were allowed to make our own decisions.</p>
<p>My older one (D) always asked my advice (still does…constantly). The younger one (S) never asked advice and always signed up for same schedule as his friends. He did have to get our permission (required by the school) not to take a math class his senior year - but we were fine with that (he didn’t need it to graduate and we knew he was going to go to a music conservatory that didn’t require it). I did request that he join the “honors” program in college. He didn’t want to, but knowing that he was only going to take one non-music course per semester, I wanted him to be somewhat challenged. Unfortunately, I think he’s going to drop the Honors after freshman year. Oh well, I tried.</p>
<p>Three kids. We have “put” a kid in a class once. That was when we had our youngest moved down from a GT level math class/track she had tested into ( actually, she repeated the class the following year, and tracked into one year instead of two years above grade level math). She was struggling to maintain B’s and that effort was consuming her, and affecting all of her other classes. She was avoiding all homework, etc. She was livid at the time. There was ego and pride involved. However, she is our youngest, and we knew how these math tracks worked in high school. </p>
<p>She was not failing, in fact not even in the bottom half of the math class, but the teacher (30 years of experience with middle school math) agreed with us. He said most of the time she looked like a deer in the headlights. By the time we made that decision we had already hired a tutor, and she had been going in before school for extra help. She just wasn’t developmentally ready for that math level.</p>
<p>There are many parents who would have had her continue in the GT track. Having an older kid, who sailed through the GT math track, we could see this was not going to get better for her in the future. </p>
<p>It was a wise decision, despite the hormonal drama at the time.</p>
<p>S1 did it all on his own. S2 needed a little more guidance… a few gentle reminders that taking several PE classes in senior year would not help him get into college!</p>
<p>Our high school used to have parents sign off on a form, though now it is done electronically and we don’t need to approve anything. One year I wanted my son to take a music/band class. I think he knew I would give him a hard time if he didn’t have one on the list so he strategically had my husband sign the form! :-)</p>