Yes, and he knew what we made while we were working.
One kid doesn’t talk to us, but I knew his starting salary (and I still have access to bank account). Other 2, plus one spouse, I do know. Was surprised the spouse shared (I didn’t ask), but was negotiating and wanted to discuss pros/cons. Also know net worth of 2. Really I should say I’ve been told, because I couldn’t give you an exact figure, but they all shared.
We didn’t discuss how much we made with kids, but they could come pretty close to figuring it out if they thought about it. They don’t know our net worth, and I will likely only tell one, if any (that child would be executor if something happened to me).
One not exactly but I know it’s a good bit more than either of us make. He does text me when he gets a raise or bonus but not the amount. The other two will be getting stipends from grad school programs starting in the Fall. One told me the amount and the other I googled the program to see. Now that they’re all out of college I’m done doing their taxes. I only did it the past few years so I could maximize our American Opportunity Tax Credit.
Our kids don’t know how much we make but know we are very comfortable and can travel and dine out as much as we choose. We have also told them they won’t need to support us at any point and know we support D and pay all her expenses as she continues to be medically disabled.
My son is about to start working and yes.
My daughter has a summer job and yes.
In some rare cases we even know how much some other CC posters kids make😀
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We know what they make. D knows what we make and what her brother makes. DS could easily know what we make if he wanted - by simply asking his sister…She handles everyone’s taxes.
She would likely get free sandwiches at Jersey Mikes, too, and they are tasty!
One of my kids (aged almost 24) lives at home and is struggling to find a place in the real world - my guess is s/he makes somewhere in the region of $500-$750/mo. A classic case of ‘failure to thrive’ which is causing enormous stress for H and me, and a lot of resentment.
We continue to support everything…for me the resentment does not stem from financial support, which we can manage, it stems from my kid’s dreams of fame and fortune, and an unwillingness to work a traditional job while striving for said fame and fortune.
My other kid, who is graduating college next week, makes precisely - nothing!
With him, I have zero worries and H and I have agreed between us that he will be given some time to decompress from four unusual college years, to explore options etc; he is not a slacker and will do just fine!
Might have a general ballpark idea what the “kids” and their spouses make, but really not sure and none of my business. Plus have no clue about bonuses and stock grants and such. DH has a general idea of their net worth b/c he sometimes talks investments and taxes with them. Fortunately they are doing well and are self sufficient.
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Daughter is a SAHM and rarely shares financial information and her H is a partner at a top law firm so they are comfortable. S is in finance and sometimes shares his annual bonus ballpark figures. I don’t ask except to remind them periodically to save money.
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Yes. Our family accountant does their taxes and they send their information to me to pass along.
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I have a basic idea of both kids. I know ShawD’s salary but there are a few bonuses/additions that I don’t know specifics on. With ShawSon, we discussed his salary which is negotiated with the VCs. I think it changes when they do the next round of fund-raising. I can estimate the value of his stock. Both kids use my accountant for taxes and our financial advisors. The accountants copy me on the returns, though I haven’t looked. Don’t have any particular need to know details.
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Have your adult offspring authorized, “your” accountant to disclose their tax information to you? Regardless of whether you look at their returns or not??
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Yes, The accountant does work for my companies and me and the tax returns for my kids, my mother when she was alive, the trust my father established for my mother and their grandkids.
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I got that your accountant does the work for your entire family. I just wondered if your son knew s/he copied you in on his personal tax return. Is he married? Does his wife know you have access to their tax return? I guess that, “yes,” was the answer to the specific question that your adult children know you are copied in and have access to their individual tax returns.
It’s clear from your posts that you have significant family wealth and consider at least some of your financial planning from the perspective of totality and for generational wealth planning and management. Nothing wrong with that. I was simply thinking of it from an ethics perspective on the accountant’s part. It’s one thing for your kids to share their income amount with you. It’s a different issue if their accountant is doing that (even if s/he is also your accountant).
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@Hoggirl, I understand. Interestingly, I can see that the accountant did not copy me when they sent my son his return this year. I have not discussed anything with his wife and have no idea whether he has. I do have access to his return as far as I can see. No need to look.
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I would have been ticked if I found out my fil had access to our tax return. I wouldn’t have wanted him to know what my salary or investment income was. I know you aren’t “looking,” but that would have made no difference to me because I wouldn’t have understood why my fil needed even the ability to look. Even if my fil were paying for the preparation of my tax return. I wouldn’t have wanted that either. All of that would have been way too entangled for me. But, all families are different.
I think it is unethical for your accountant to give you access to your son and daughter-in-law’s tax return (whether you look or not) unless they are both aware of that and have given express permission for that.
I’m done harping on this now, regardless.
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There was on’y one year that we actually knew one kid’s income. Our tax preparer/accountant did the kid’s taxes because he worked in at least ten different states. It was a complicated return. When it was complete but not yet filed, the accountant sent it to us…(our kid knew this was happening), and good thing, because we found a few very significant errors that had to be corrected.
Other than that…really…I don’t need to or want to see my kids’ tax returns. If they want to share, fine…but really, they are both adults, and they don’t need to share this with us.
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I find it helpful in giving advice to know roughly what the kids are making but I don’t see any reason to know beyond an approximate sense.