<p>Let’s be honest here - children are a financial burden - I sure am. At the same time, many other monikers can be applied: they are a source of joy and pride and love. </p>
<p>Honestly, I think it is wrong to bear a child when you cannot care for them properly, in all terms of the word. For instance, I see individuals on this website who say they put their retirement or ‘life’ above their kids. In the culture I come from and the cultures I most appreciate, children are very important and being properly educated/raised is crucial. As such, if you are unwilling to focus such attention on your children as a result of financial reasons, I question why you bear them.</p>
<p>I’m sure people will disagree with me and think that ‘overfocus’ on kids makes them highly indulged and spoiled and whatever. I do not agree. Where I come from, parents put their savings on the line so their children can attend university. Children are a reflection on their parents, yes, but are also the future. Denying them possibilities that may contribute to their growth is wrong.</p>
<p>If I had a kid, I think this quote would sum up my state of mind about it: “I would give up the unessential; I would give my money, I would give my life for my children; but I wouldn’t give myself.”
~ The Awakening (which kinda sucks, by the way, but I like this quote)</p>
<p>But I know I care about myself a bit more than I care about others, and I probably always will. So, no kids for me. </p>
<p>I’ve considered becoming a foster parent for older kids, though. My foster mom says they’re not “wanted” as much as babies, and it’s mostly babies I have trouble with. I like people you can have conversations with. </p>
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<p>But what are they growing up for? So they can have kids themselves and just start the cycle all over again?</p>
<p>I interpret ‘burden’ as increased load. Technically, children do increase the load. It may be negligible depending on your income and assets, but they do not come without costs. </p>
<p>Being rich and powerful is certainly a good solution to that problem ;)</p>
<p>Well, my perspective is that I want to be powerful enough that I fulfill my aspirations while at the same time, provide my children with opportunities to be in a similar place when they are adults. I am interested, for example, in international law, sustainable development etc. along with medical stuff that I’m already involved in. The former cannot be done unless you are powerful, but if you are successful, you can improve the world so your children and humanity has a better one. They can do the same and humanity will ultimately advance.</p>
<p>I am also quite selfish, way more selfish than my parents and I know that I cannot make the same sacrifices they did. Thus, I need to be in a better situation or I will not rear children.</p>
<p>My wording sounds harsh, but my parents have gone above and beyond what most parents consider sacrifices. They moved countries - came into a brand new culture just so I have a better life. My dad, in deciding to do that, was estranged from his family. My mother stayed home with me for 8 years and did not pursue her graduate studies until now. We didn’t get a house until about a year ago. They did that and much, much more. Education really comes first in our family.</p>
<p>I am not so self centered that I think not working for a few hours is an undue hardship or not being able to take vacations or whatever. I just think what my parents have done is just incredible and I don’t know if I can ever do that. I’m just not that strong a person right now. Thus, I do not want to be in a position where I have to make such sacrifices - so that I can provide mine what I was given, without having to go so far.</p>
<p>There are ‘normal’ sacrifices that parenting entails, and I think I can handle that. I just can’t do what they did. Culture and family values/religion play a big role in this and I dunno if it’ll make sense to anyone.</p>
<p>WIt’s great. Smart people refuse to repopulate while those who do not look forward into the future freely have many kids, straining the economy and government. In turn, those children reproduced by “less intelligent” people will be dumber as well, failing to plan for the future and having more kids, repeating the cycle until humanity becomes like the “proles” in Orwells 1984. As someone intelligent, it is your responsibility, given to you by society, to bear responsible, intelligent children to continue humanities advancement. Refusing to have children is really a selfish thing, focusing on your own career and needs, while quickly after you die you will be forgotten anyways. That being said, society requires children produced by intelligent parents. Those given intelligence owe society a favor.</p>
<p>Well the population is seven billion…I mean not having more than a kid or two would be ideal so we don’t exhaust resources. Also, with a high population, some new diseases could spread which would wipe everyone out so… I guess having a large amount of kids is selfish.</p>
<p>I just realized that, in my mind, <em>not</em> having kids has never been an actual option (as in I’ve never actually considered going down that road). I’ve always seen myself as a mom. Now, I have considered adoption, but I never minded the thought of pregnancy either. I’ve also changed my mind on how many I wanted. I used to want a large family (like 6 kids, no joke), but realizing how much it would cost to give them the absolute best life possible (and I mean giving them opportunities to pursue their interests like dancing, music, sports and the like, not clothes, toys, etc) made me rethink. My career choice(s) are mine and involve my interests, and the pay may not support what I originally wanted. And seeing this thread has definitely given me some other things to consider, but I never thought of kids as burdens. </p>
<p>One thing I really believe in though is that having kids will completely change your life, and in some ways it won’t be to your liking. I believe that if you have kids, then they should be the first priority. Hayclon has a really good point in not losing yourself. If you go out partying every night and just go wild every chance you get, then maybe kids can wait or just aren’t for you (and that’s comletely fine IMO). The same can be said if you are a complete workaholic. If you don’t want to slow down, then don’t! Keep going. But I really think that being a parent is right for <em>me</em>. And I don’t see it as civic duty or a selfish whim. As for marriage, I’m pretty sure I want to get married mid 20s with kids in late 20s (whether adopted or biological depends. A lot can happen in 10 yrs)</p>
<p>To be honest, I think a lot of my life choices in general will change between now and then. I mean, we as teens are just now beginning to branch out when it comes to things like this, so who knows what we’ll come across. Keep an open mind.</p>