<p>I am two weeks into a college that is about 30 minutes form my house. I hate it so much. I sit here day in and day out wondering why i'm here. I CAN'T drop out or anything due to my family/society and I judge college drop outs so it'd be so hypocritical. </p>
<p>I have tried being outgoing and i've tried meeting people but I seriously haven't met anyone who I would actually want to be friends with. I am so fake with everyone I know here and I pretend to laugh at their humor and everything. It sucks. Does it ever get better? My living conditions SUCK so much. My dorm room is okay but the bathroom is beyond gross and I feel dirtier after taking a shower. </p>
<p>What can I do to make these four years go by faster? I'm at the point where I hate this so much that I don't want to study but I have no choice because I will be a failure. It's not even like I wanna transfer anywhere else. I just want to graduate college and move on with my life as an adult. Please give me advice</p>
<p>But personally by experience, nothing ever stays the same through even one year in college.</p>
<p>Plus, two weeks is not enough time to meet everyone in college. If you claim you still haven’t met friends, give it more time. If you don’t like ANYONE, then maybe the problem is you, not them. If that’s the case, how are we supposed to help you unless you make the effort to change?</p>
<p>OP,
I think you need to go to the counseling office and get some help. You’ve posted a myriad of threads and it’s hard to tell what’s true and what’s not, but what is evident is that you are a person in personal crisis. </p>
<p>I don’t know if your mother truly is ill or not, but the mental health counselors have seen other students in that situation. They are also experienced in students having trouble making the social and academic transition to college, both things you have posted about.</p>
<p>But I sense that the problem you are facing is within you, and not just Rutgers. Please get some help because things won’t change for you if you just change locations.</p>
<p>What makes you think things will be better after college? You need an attitude adjustment firstly, because if you’re freaking out after 2 weeks counting down the days to 2017…How you gonna cope in the “adult life” when you don’t like your coworkers or boss either? You need to realize college is where you grow up and let go of these notions like “every dropout is a failure, i can’t be one of them.” Your judgments are only harming yourself. </p>
<p>If things are so terrible as you describe, we’d be seeing nothing but complaints from hundreds of Rutgers freshmen. The bathrooms aren’t unbearable and you’re so close to home it doesn’t even really matter. Go commute or something.</p>
<p>Cry me a river. Another Joopstah excuse-filled rant to make him/herself feel better. You live a privileged life (you go to college and have parents that pay for it) and you still complain, smh. You seriously going to quit on college after two weeks? lol.</p>
<p>Why are ya’ll telling joopstah to transfer? He/She hasn’t even been there long enough to make a proper decision about the school. I felt a similar way until this past week I joined a club and met a few new people and caught up with some old high school friends.</p>
<p>The club I joined is a Christian Bible study club (specific to my denomination). That may not be your thing, but I guarantee you anything religious like that, people tend to be friendly and more open. </p>
<p>But anyways, give it some time. I know it’s extremely frustrating (trust me, I KNOW), but thinking negatively is just going to make this situation worse.</p>
<p>It can get better, but it is entirely up to you. Transferring won’t solve anything, by the sounds of it, it isn’t your school that’s causing you to be unhappy, it stems from yourself. As mentioned previously, seek some help. I really like college, though there have been tense and unhappy moments, and I believe you can too.</p>
<p>hey joopstah, i don’t know if you’re gonna get to this thread. but here’s some insight from someone who’s been in a college for 2 years, also living 30 minutes away from home. and what i wanna tell you is that it’s okay. </p>
<p>when i read your post, i basically see where i am now as a third year. i think ur in a good place compared to where im at. you’ll find your friends. i know what it feels like to go through college and be “fake” a lot and I think its normal… cause you’re taken out of your comfort zone and you don’t know how to identify with people around you.</p>
<p>i suggest perhaps keeping in touch with someone back home about your situation (i think they can do a good deal in keeping you sane) and just be patient. instead of being fake, try just slowly easing into conversation. i think being open with someone like a residential assistant on your experience (if you feel you can trust him/her) will be a good choice.</p>
<p>try getting into writing. i know for me, im a pretty passionate writer at times. what that allows me to do is be centered by myself with my own thoughts. often times, especially during a time like college, we get taken away from our comfort as individuals so that time for ourself is important. </p>
<p>do that, trust your instinct with what you believe is right, and i think you’ll be fine.</p>
<p>You will get better I think, a lot of people are really insecure when they start college. It’s a huge adjustment to make. It takes a while to get used to. My advice is not to get worry whether your some stud acing everything and getting laid all the time and to just take it as it comes. I mean make sure you do okay in school since you’re paying a lot to go there, but don’t stress about making friends, just let it happen as it will.
And I don’t think life after college is as different as you think. I’m now starting my 4th year, but some of the people I hang out with are a little older and past the whole college time. We are still both young adults with pretty similar lifestyles, the only difference being that they usually work more while I only work part time and go to school during the day. I think what you’re struggling with most is just being away from the structure of living at home and going to mandatory school all day, where now how you fill your day is up to you, not necessarily college itself. But I think that’s normal for freshmen, it’s a phase I went through and still feel like I’m going through sometimes. Also, I think most freshmen including me as a freshmen come to college a little delusional about the whole thing, expecting it to be a non-stop party while at the same time underestimating the new stresses and responsibilities that accompany it. It’s a great time though because when you are away and have more freedom you get to figure out who you really are.</p>