“I did not see someone who seemed defensive and unable to see his own shortcomings.”
Anyone who says or believes that has definitely not read his book. He’s quite open about his shortcomings.
Harry has been tormented by the tabloids for most of his life. In his book, he recounts that photographers would actually hit or push him in order to provoke a reaction from him that would get them a photo that could bring in enough cash to buy a house. Provocative photos of Royals/celebrities were quite the cash cow. Between his own experiences and that of his mother and family, it’s no wonder he resents the tabloids.
If someone would pay me to write a book about my estranged relationship with my brother I’d do it without a second thought or any guilt. And if you asked me if I’d be open to reconciliation, I’d say yes. To some this might make no sense, but for me it is logical. Yes, three sides to a story and all that, but Harry has shared his side, lived it and believes he has nothing left to give. I get it - he’s waiting for someone to reach out. There is a point where you’re just done.
That is my overwhelming feeling. He knows he’s done a lot of bad things, but he’s tried to understand them in the context of his life. He’s not proud of them, but he’s not ashamed of them either. I feel like he has put in the work to try to understand why he is like he is. I think the time will come when he will regret writing this book as he has, just as Patti Davis regrets what she said in her relative youth. He seems to feel that he is baring his soul in an effort to arrive at a greater good. Right now, maybe it feels like it’s his only option to try to heal and bridge the divides in the family, but he’s only 38. I know a 38yo seems plenty old and to a 38yo it feels like they’ve learned all they are going to learn, but looking at him through 60yo eyes, I do wince a bit. I wish he could’ve waited and seen how things played out.
With my own family, there have been a couple of times when I wanted a clean break, especially with my sister. I’ve always made the joke that we are a Sesame Street skit – one of these things is not like the other, and it’s ME. Anyone looking at my parents would think they were good parents and they were; they just weren’t the parents I needed. I think that Harry feels that way about his dad and the institution. When his mom died, there went the one person he felt was in his corner and otherwise he felt unprotected. Misunderstood. I’m not saying that’s true, but I could see him creating that narrative for himself and I think he’s still too young to exercise the needed forgiveness to his dad and brother. Intellectually, he GETS why they are like they are, but only time will allow him to offer the grace to get over the slights, real or perceived.
Exactly! You said it better than me…sorry @Nrdsb4 with my awkward wording. I meant he acknowledges his poor behavior but doesn’t seem to be making excuses for it…just explaining it through his perspective.
I have to think about that one. (I never read Patti Davis’ book.) Considering future regret is difficult under duress. His decision to do the book may have been done for two reasons…protecting Meghan and his kids from a one-sided tabloid perspective while also providing for his family. I was curious how much security would cost for them and saw figures of $2-3 million per year to around $10 million/yr for someone with a high profile like Mark Zuckerberg’s family.
Especially if you are British! There’s a reason “Keep Calm and Carry On” is such a popular slogan in the UK:
It’s likely that any public disclosure of William attending therapy (even for Harry’s benefit) would be portrayed negatively in the press, so he would naturally tend to shy away from that sort of thing.
And Harry’s need for therapy likely contributes to negative opinions about him in the UK, especially amongst older generations. My mother’s reaction: “he’s behaving like a child and needs to grow up!”
Both William and Harry have advocated for mental health, so you’d think they would want to serve as examples, to address the stigma associated with therapy.
Sounds to me like William’s advocacy is not really directed towards encouraging the use of professional therapists:
“Just having a conversation with a friend or family member can really make such a difference. It’s OK to have this conversation. It’s really important to have this conversation.”
And in the UK this makes sense as most people can’t afford a private therapist and being referred to an NHS one by your GP is a lengthy and difficult process. We have relatives who can’t find a child psychologist for their kid unless they travel to London.
I think it’s possible to be sympathetic towards Harry (and William) for having lost their mother at a young age and in such a horrific way, and to also question his motivation for dragging his family and spilling intimate secrets in a way that is not unlike what the tabloids and British press have been doing to him his entire life and more recently, Meghan. I personally don’t think Meghan was in royal life long enough to garner the same level of empathy as Harry, but it clearly affected her mental health, and that can’t be ignored.
When I saw the Netflix doc I thought, OK, they feel like they need to tell their side of the story, which they did without divulging specific details about who said what and what exactly was said. They could have ended it there and gone on to live the life they keep saying they want to live, here in America. But the book and the interviews about the book, take it to a new level which is unlikely to leave the news cycle any time soon.
Their message is confusing. In the documentary, we see them dodging the press and “running for their lives” to America, where they continue to dodge the press - yet what they have done since, continues to invite the press into their lives, as they feed the very monster that they claim to be escaping from - so which is it?
The dollar amounts that have been floated around about what they had when they fled the UK, Harry’s inheritance from Diana’s estate and additional monies that he may have been given by Charles, would be more than sufficient for most people to live well in America, yet they felt the need to further exploit their situation with the Netflix & book deals It’s hard to know exactly what their end game is.
End game looks like to live in luxury, socialize and collaborate with celebrities, do fluffy feel good philanthropy and flex royal connections for personal gain and to remain relevant. To be fair, that’s pretty much what all royals do, just the big boss has some real responsibilities.
I think your response mirrors the narrative put out by the British tabloids and serves to reinforce the position encouraged by the royal machine.
I see many mentions of Patti Davis and her regrets about publishing a book criticizing her parents and upbringing. I don’t personally see any basis for comparing Harry’s book with Davis’s. I was already an adult for the period of time Davis’s father was in the White House and there was never a focused effort from either the White House or the media to portray Davis as malignant, unbalanced or deserving of vicious attack and bodily harm (see J Clarkson, P Morgan and virtually everything published about Meghan Markle in the Daily Mail). Sadly, that is not the case for Harry, his wife, and even their infant son.
My take on the book, Spare, the interviews and documentary, is that literally no where else could you find any point of view other than that of the Royal firm. It’s truly laughable to say that the family (and William in particular) are maintaining a “dignified silence” when literally everything in the British press (including the BBC) is in lockstep with protecting the institution.
I’m sure everyone who has contempt for Harry and his revelations will continue to be indifferent to the safety and well-being of his family and continue to support the powerful institutions who continue to target them. I’m just personally glad he’s taken steps to reveal his own experience from inside the institution. I think it’s important to have that information out there, even if many prefer to continue to defend the established powers that be.
I believe they want to raise real money (big bucks) for their charities and that they really believe in those causes. I also believe they want to continue to live their lives of luxury too and they they aren’t going to give everything to the causes.
That isn’t that unusual. Many people have causes as their side gigs and a few live quietly and pop out only to raise money. Paul Newman seemed to have a good balance of his private life, his professional life, and his charities. Gary Sinise does it well. Some sports superstars make it work, although they may not live quietly.
Harry and Meghan need to find their balance. They want to be more like Oprah and live large and get attention for their charity work too. But Oprah worked really hard for years before she became a star and could fund those charities. Harry and Meghan seem to want it all overnight.
I think if he was really that concerned about his families safety he would not have written a book, made a documentary, and gone on a promotional tour… further opening their life up to criticism and spotlight. Secondly, they would have dropped the Duke and Duchess titles. He will still always be a prince but keeping the titles is quite questionable.
I think if he was really that concerned about his families safety he would not have written a book, made a documentary, and gone on a promotional tour… further opening their life up to criticism and spotlight
As far as I can see, it made no difference whatsoever whether Harry wrote a book, did interviews, or made a documentary when it comes to criticism and spotlight. Even during the periods when the couple were completely silent, the tabloid media diligently produced negative commentary about them and offered and spent significant sums of money to anyone (no matter how tenuously connected) who would consent to publicly denigrate them (looking hard at “loving father” Thomas Markle and his enterprising and despicable daughter, Samantha Markle). Meghan’s ex-husband is said to have refused $$ to trash her in the tabloids (and good for him). There is now an industry created for the sole purpose of promoting negative press about Meghan in particular, online and through other media, and that industry makes millions for the Murdoch family and others of their ilk.
It’s pretty disingenuous to suggest that they’ve somehow brought this all on themselves. As another poster pointed out, the private security required to protect them costs millions of dollars per year. Since Harry’s dear “Pa”, who still pays all security costs for his disgraced sexual predator brother (also no longer a “working royal”) and who rakes in many, many millions of pounds of untaxed income, has decided to cut him off financially, I don’t see that they are doing anything wrong by making as much money as they can, simultaneously putting their own story out to the public. After all, if you refuse to support the costs of protecting your own son/brother and his family from the danger you’ve played a significant part in creating for them, you don’t really have any standing to complain about how they choose to generate the necessary income to live as well (and safely) as they can. No matter how wealthy you perceive them to be, it’s a tiny fraction of the wealth Charles and William now have. Can anyone seriously make a case that the family have actually “earned “ that wealth?
Well, there is no doubt about how our opinions get influenced by what we read/hear/see in media put out by royals and celebrities (including Harry) and their PR teams because there sure aren’t no peer reviewed scientific and factual studies available on lives of rich and famous, at NHS, WHO or CDC’s websites.
There are plenty of people in the world who are famous and keep a low profile.
I do think if H and M got out of the spotlight the media would diminish. The tabloids are most interested in juicy stories.
As for Charles “cutting H and M off” not sure what the true story is… none of us really know.
There are other ways to make money besides selling your story. Maybe not as financially lucrative…
It’s hard to know exactly what their end game is.