<p>I've read about long-distance relationships that run the gamut. Some work for a few weeks. Some work for a few years. Some end happily ever after. </p>
<p>So ... I'm not sure how many of these LDRs started as "genuine" relationships. Right now I'm in a relationship with someone ... and we want to stay together even as we attend our separate colleges. </p>
<p>I put the word genuine in air-quotes because I have a feeling that most HS relationships are mostly touchy-feely and little else. </p>
<p>Us, on the other hand - we don't do much of the touchy-feely stuff and as we talked, we realized that above anything, we'd wouldn't be able to relate as well because we'd miss out on all the mutual experiences. For this reason I think that we'll probably be able to handle the distance better, but I don't know, well, because I've never done it before. </p>
<p>So, what are your experiences regarding LDRs? For "serious" couples, is there hope? How bad does the loneliness get? Will we likely grow apart, or does distance make the heart grow fonder? What boundaries should we mutually set (e.g. no making out with others or what?) Or should we not set boundaries and leave each other to his and her own judgement (I feel that this is more respectful)?</p>
<p>We are very open with each other and I've actually proposed the immediately aforementioned ideas. I just need some real-world experience because none of us have any.</p>
<p>I was in a LDR for a year and a half before we ended (together for a total of 5 years, 1.5 in college). We had been together since freshman year of high school and had been through homelessness, drug addiction, parental violence, and everything in between. IMO, that’s as “real” as it gets. However, we grew as people and became different. No one’s fault and we ended on very civil terms. </p>
<p>There is no “likely”. There are no “shoulds”. You have to do what feels right to you, not what others tell you. Relationships really have to be shaped by the individuals involved if you want them to survive. At least that’s what I’ve learned. </p>
<p>Thank you for your wisdom! I’m sorry that everything didn’t work out for you in the end, but I am comforted by the fact that your relationship ended on an amicable note.</p>
<p>We started getting serious halfway through senior year, and we both feel that to abruptly cut off our relationship at graduation would be premature. We both agreed that we’d feel great senses of loss. </p>
<p>We’d like to at least give it a shot, and maybe it’ll work out, or maybe it won’t, but in the latter case, hopefully it ends on a positive note, rather than an abrupt, or negative note. Although all good things may come to an end, if our relationship comes to an end, hopefully the end is like that of a beautiful musical composition - pleasing - with a sense of conclusion and closure. Who knows. Perhaps with 4 years we’ll grow apart, or even closer. We’ll see!</p>
<p>The best advice I can give is to not over-think it and try to plan out the future. You can’t pass up an amazing connection and relationship with a person just because you think it may not work out two years down the road. Live day by day, and as long as you’re both happy, keep doing what you’re doing.</p>