<p>My best friend and I have known each other since fourth grade and have been best friends since sixth or seventh grade. We have a pretty unique relationship. We are with each other all the time and never get sick of each other. In all of our years of being friends we have never been in a fight that lasted more than an hour or two. We’re extremely similar but also really different. She’s more outgoing whereas I am more shy, but she takes me out of my shell. We applied to a few of the same schools and I was wondering about your opinions about dorming together. I know a lot of people think it’s a bad idea to dorm with your best friend. We both plan on getting jobs so we won’t be with each other 24/7. We don’t really get jealous of each other and we are both okay with making friends together as well as having separate friends (That’s how it is now. There are people that we are both friends with and we also have our own friends). We have very similar tastes in music and styles and that type of thing. Do you think dorming together would work out?</p>
<p>I think that there are lots of best friends that go off to college together and have an amazing time being roommates. It sounds like you have a good plan to have some space, and you should discuss in advance how to solve problems that come up. But to not dorm together just because some people have had bad experiences seems wrong. What if you DON’T room together and end up having terrible roommates? Maybe look for a suite style dorm situation so you are still being social with others.</p>
<p>Why not? At least you would know you won’t get stuck with someone you don’t get along with or someone who has very bad habits that impact your study time or peace of mind. You can still meet lots of others on your floor and in your dorm.</p>
<p>My brother got stuck with the roommate from hell…live with your best friend!!!</p>
<p>Id say don’t dorm with her- college can be a scary time, and you can end up clinging to each other for support instead of making new friends. I went to BU with one of my best friends, but we chose to live with random roommates. Although there were definitely ups and downs with the random choice, we are both glad we did it because we were able to branch out and have our own friend groups while still having each other to lean on. We also lived in the same building! </p>
<p>I would suggest branching out.</p>
<p>BU might be different than a state school in the sense that students are coming from all over the country. At state schools it is mostly in-state so almost everyone is rooming with someone they know. When you are OOS and go random for a roommate you get stuck with someone that did not have anyone to room with. That is what happened to my brother. And believe me there are numerous reasons why people from his high school did not want to live with him.</p>
<p>Most freshmen at BU in my experience go random or live with someone they met in a Facebook group. BU is a private school so no one really goes by the instate/oos.</p>
<p>I vote with live with your friend, but make specific plans to make additional friends. Figure out how to make that happen, e.g., attend different FYSOP groups, join different clubs, etc. </p>
<p>That said, there are good roommates and bad roommates, but one thing is always true. You survive. DD has had several random roommates because of circumstances - some bad, some good, and one in the middle. Treat them with politeness and respect, and the VAST majority will be tolerable.</p>
<p>My son’s biggest disappointment at BU this year has been his roommate. They have absolutely nothing in common. It’s not so bad that he felt that he needed to find another option. However, they just coexist and he had hoped for a roommate where he would have lots in common and could attend activities together- especially those first few weeks in school. His two friends from high school chose to room together at the state university they are attending. We had thought that this was a bad idea because it might mean that they would not make the effort to meet other people but now my son is very envious.</p>
<p>I can see why that would be envy producing, but frankly, if that’s his biggest issue at BU, he’s doing fantastic!</p>
<p>DD had the roommates from hell for a six week program. As in having to retrieve them from the bathroom because they were passed out on the floor in the middle of the night kind of roommates. She told me about her concerns, I listened and made possible suggestions, and she elected to not follow them. That’s perfectly fine - they were suggestions, and coming from someone with lots of life experience, but no current experience. </p>
<p>Fast forward a year - somehow this roommate and some related issues came up in conversation. It’s been two years now - I still think about it - and she has completely dismissed it from memory as unimportant. Reminds me of advice that I have taken to heart from someone on this board. When they call you with a problem, don’t hang up and think about how to solve it and get back to them with your brilliant solutions. Telling you was likely all they needed - they have moved on. Don’t bring it up again - they have collected new info and (unless THEY bring up again) have solved it to their satisfaction.<br>
This takes discipline for me, but pays off.</p>
<p>Randomness is good. College is where you grow and experience new things. Some will be bad. Some will be good. But unless you step out, you’ll never experience either one.</p>
<p>DO NOT live with your best friend. Live in separate places, branch out, and then combine friend groups. Helps make BU a little bit smaller:) </p>
<p>Having a random roommate freshman year was the best experience of my life. I became great friends with everyone on my floor, and we all keep in touch. Things can go so south so quickly if you bring high school with you to college. Trust me.</p>