<p>I'm new here.<br>
Son is an international boarder this fall as a sophomore.
We got a call from him today, he was so upset about his winter term grade. He got B's and C for all his subjects. He used to be a high honor student in middle school and the freshman year. His adviser suggested he drop from honor classes to regular.<br>
Son mentioned about drop from BS. I really don't know what to do. Will anyone give us some advise?</p>
<p>I really don't know what to do! Either my son ! We are so so upset and wondering if he should drop from BS and back to public school here.</p>
<p>Anyone has similar experience to share ? Or any advise? Thanks !</p>
<p>Have you seen the grade distribution for your son's school? If they don't give many As, he may be fine. It depends on your long term plans for him. If you intend for him to attend college in the United States, he may be fine. </p>
<p>Has the advisor recommended he drop down a level in all subjects, or only in one? Could taking classes in a foreign language be causing the difficulties?</p>
<p>Totally normal. Boarding School is far more difficult than most public schools. Your son needs to adjust to more rigor, more homework etc. The LAST thing you should do is run away from the first set of bad grades in his career. Instead, your son should be talking to the teachers about what he needs to do to improve and then doing it. If the School says drop one or more Honors courses, take their advice. These are crucial learning moments. The last thing you want to teach him is that it's ok to give up.</p>
<p>Agree with the above advice. Leaving the school because of grades is not going to help either the student in dealing with difficulties, nor will it hide the current report card. His records follow him everywhere.</p>
<p>10th grade classes are generally much more difficult and graded harder than 9th grade classes at boarding schools. Boarding schools look at 9th grade as a time of adjustment to the new environment. By 10th grade, the schools look to ratchet up the level a bit. 11th grade is probably the peak workload, with 12th grade being more of a victory lap.</p>
<p>As to the advice to drop down to regular classes from the advisor, have you checked with the various teachers to get their recommendation on each specific class. You pay good money for this education for your son. You should be able to talk to the teachers (on the phone) as necessary, especially when there is a question of whether a class is appropriate.</p>
<p>I think talking to the teachers you will find one of 3 scenarios... 1) Test grades are significantly better that homework. 2) Homework is significantly better than test grades. 3) Homework and test grades are consistent with each other. If either 1 or 2 is true, there is probably some degree that performance can be improved. More effective study strategies are usually needed and perhaps the school can assist with this (extra tutoring if tests are a problem, organizational guidance if homework is the issue). If number 3 is true, it is not clear and instructor guidance is probably necessary to make the decision.</p>
<p>The most important question her is... Is your son learning in the most effective manner in his current classes (is he struggling to keep up)? If not, what (inside or outside of the classroom) needs to be adjusted?</p>
<p>Thank you all for your advice.</p>
<p>We called his advisor and teachers yesterday, son decided to switch some classes to regular but still keep two in advanced honor. He will have meetings with teachers to discuss about his study strategy and find out how to improve. Seems everything is settle down now but somehow, I felt son is unhappy : lack of confidence because of his academic performance. This question has been discussed so many times at CC, I hope someone can give me (or the kids) about HOW TO SURVIVE AT BOARDING SCHOOL ?</p>
<p>Many boarding schools do not subscribe to the grade inflation seen at lower grades. Middle school is about self esteem and making students feel good about themselves. Your son is just having his first taste of the real world (you don't think that all the superior grades in middle school were real do you?)</p>
<p>In competitive boarding schools, the grade criteria is different. Doing the work as assigned is a C. Doing superior work on some of the assignment is an B. Doing absolutely superior work on the entire assignment might (might) get an A. </p>
<p>My daughter's prep school is proud that there has not been a since 4.0 graduate in 2 years. </p>
<p>Does this sort of grading put your child at a disadvantage on college admissions/scholarships/internships. The school will tell you "no;" that colleges know the quality of the academic at each school, as well as the school providing a profile cover sheet to the transcript. On the other hand, large schools will do a first sort by shear numbers, so competitive prep school kids do lose out. Internships, scholarships and other programs with grade point cutoffs are a problem as well.</p>
<p>The solution probably is NOT TO drop advanced classes. Most prep school Advanced class grading is actually easier. In my daughters case her grade improved when she moved UP. Grading curve was easier, she was not bored or annoyed by the screw-off kids, and she was intellectually engaged. She also mentioned that her humor was more compatible with the humor of the kids in the honors program. She firmly wants to stay in honors, what ever the grades.</p>
<p>I had a same question regarding the tough grade. My daughter was an excellent in the middle school getting strainght A+ all the time. Now her grades are As and Bs. Teachers say that those are excellent grades I raised the same question about the college admission. They said that they invite college admission staffs every year and explain how tough the grades are and how the grade distributions are, and they say that it is is not a problem.
However, another concern is that kids lose confidence and they get frustrated since they know it is extremely difficult to get A. Sometimes my daughter says that she is not good at academic any more just because she does not get straight As. I am afraid that it will affect her selfesteem and pride about her self. I thought about pulling her out the BS and putting back into public school. There are many other peopoe who say that pulling kids out of BS is not a good idea. In a sense I agree because kids will carry that experiences for their lifetime. It is a kind of failed experience. That is what I am fraid of. So I am still not sure about what to do. As for the college admission, I am not so sure which way is better. Bs sends many kids to very good liveral arts colleges and they send about 15% kids to Ivy. What that means is that only top kids are very successful at BS. If they are very good at public school, I am sure they can go to all the schools that BS kids go to except Ivy. Of course, there may be other advantages in BS. They can adjust to colege environment better later and they are trained to prepare for hard works and etc. Anyway, I am confused and I still do not know what the best solution would be.</p>
<p>As and Bs are excellent grades, given the probable additional rigor of her school. Besides, part of becoming an adult is learning how to cope with disappointment. </p>
<p>It's just my opinion, but I think you'd be making a mistake to "rescue" her from As and Bs in order protect her self-esteem. What will happen at the next setback in her life? Can you rescue her from that as well? Her self-esteem will be on a better foundation if she is challenged and learns that she's not going to "win them all".</p>
<p>Reading my last post, I see that it may come off as cold. I apologize; that was not my intent.</p>
<p>Let me just reiterate that As and Bs are excellent grades at a rigorous school. Your daughter should be proud of them.</p>
<p>As and Bs in honor or advanced classes at BS is excellent but that will not guarantee you into Ivies. They look for well round students. Community service, sports and other talents are also important. I realized BS send more % of students to Ivies not only because academic, but also good sports players and legacy parents. For me, a teenager without any special background (no legacy, not extreme outstanding academic and after school activities), I knew I must work very very hard to knock the door.</p>
<p>I agree with the above posts regarding grades - but I just want to say that for preps first term, someone told us at the school that they give them a B pretty much for showing up for class. They really give a lot of leeway the first term to help them adapt. Remember it's a really tough adjustment.</p>
<p>skidad, I appreciate your encouraging comment. I like to know if college admission staffs have the same idea. I hope they do, but i am not sure because a daughter of my friends was not sccessful for a good college admission even if she was a very smart kid. My firend thinks that they should not have sent her daughter to the BS believing that she could have gone to Ivy if she had gone to public high.</p>
<p>I agree with mehappykid. As and Bs in honor or advanced classes at BS is excellent but that will not guarantee them into Ivies. Of course they need bunch of other stuffs. However, a good grade is one of the requirement. They should have a pretty good record first and do buch of other stuffs such as community service, sports and other talents. To be honest with you, I do not ask her to go to Ivy. If she is good enough to go to ivy, that is very good thing. But I have seen many Ivy gradautes who are not as successful or happy as other people who went to non-Ivy. Ivy does not guarantee a success or happiness. </p>
<p>I heard different things from photoOp. I heard that they intentionally give a tough grade in the firs term to trains students, and they give a bit more generous grde as they move on.</p>
<p>Anyway what I like to ask is "do kids have a acertain dvantages over public school students for college matriculation in soite of the tough grade?"</p>
<p>"Ivy does not guarantee a success or happiness."</p>
<p>Agreed. So WHY are so many BS people obsessed with the idea of going to an Ivy?? Are people seriously choosing prep schools based how it will effect their college admissions??? Wow.</p>
<p>My intention of sending my D to BS is not just for college admission but to let her be more independent from early stage of her life so that she can grow as a more indepdendent and competent ad a whole person. However, if she goes to Ivy, I will take it as another benefit. Another reason that I want to leave her in BS is that I believe she can be prepared for any hard work that she will face in the college or life. That is why I am concerned about her confidence issue. I think it is really important for kids to have a confidence and self esteem. I wonder how she feels about those grades which is different from straight As. I posted the hread to hear about your opinions regarding the advantages of BS over public schools.</p>
<p>It depends on the public school. There is a huge range in the quality of an education offered by public schools in this country. You are looking for our opinions on BS vs public schools. It's hard for us because we have no idea what kind of education she would get if she goes back to public school. In my case it's a no brainer, your local school may be better.</p>
<p>I will say that straight A's for the sake of straight A's is ludicrous.</p>
<p>In a competitive private school, even straight bs (or second-best, b-like grades) should be seen as an accomplishment, not a failure. I imagine she worked hard and learned a lot in the process. Encourage your child to do her best, which may be a B, or possibly not even a b at some point, but not at the cost of involvement in other aspects of the school. Really, the problem here is that the middle school your child attended throught that giving a child straight a plusses was a responsible thing to do. A's mean nothing if they are given out liberally, if students (and parents) agonize over getting an A instead of an A+, or an A- instread of an A, and see a B+ as an embarassment. </p>
<p>I believe the comment above about giving B's first term meant that some teachers give the benefit of the doubt and give kids Bs, not lower grades, in the first term. Some teachers also avoid high grades at the very start, so kids do not get discouraged when grades drop as work gets harder.</p>
<p>While not boarding, my children's school (freshman and senior) has only had four 4.0 students in 26 years!! That's not to say there haven't been more than a few 3.8's and such, but getting straight A's is nearly impossible. Most importantly my own boarding school experience taught me to reach out to my teachers and really learn how to study.</p>
<p>My advice.. keep your eye on the ball and not on the final end game quite yet.</p>
<p>Grades drop when a student goes to boarding school. it is not unsual to be high honors at an old school and then be getting D's. The student just has to work through it. It might be that the school does not give out A's easily, which is good because there is simethingh to strive for. A's should not be a regular, they have to be something to work towards.</p>
<p>Depends on which boarding school. At the top tier schools, many students experience significant grade drops.
OP: What is an "international boarder"? Is your son boarding at a non-US based boarding school with a different language? Or at a US boarding school and English is not his first language?</p>