Drugs & drinking :) :) :)

Colleges and Universities A-Z Brown University
1

<p>I thought this might be fun to talk about with future Brown students… thus the smiley faces. </p>

<p>Okay, so I don’t consider myself close-minded in the least, but for a multitude of what I consider pretty good reasons, I’m entirely close-minded to the idea of myself smoking pot, doing harder drugs, or drinking underage. The main reasons include: paranoia about not being completely in control of myself; the fact that I have an addictive personality; and my attitude toward the law (that unless there is strong evidence that it should be changed [a la civil rights in the '60s], it should be obeyed. I think that pot should be legalized, but as it hasn’t, and there is no blatant injustice in the laws against it [although they are unnecessary], I am unwilling to disobey the law). </p>

<p>Anyways, I’m positive that Brown is the right place for me (and have committed!), but the prevalence of drugs and drinking here (and at basically any other college) worries me – not because I think I’ll be pressured into doing them, but because I’m afraid of closing myself off to potential groups of friends by being That Girl Who Doesn’t Drink. I don’t want to come across as holier-than-thou or like someone who can’t have fun, you know? Or, like, have nothing in common with people with whom I’d otherwise hang out. And maybe my stubbornness about drinking and drugs is somewhat irrational, seeing as, in moderation, I know that they are practically harmless. But I don’t see myself changing my mind. </p>

<p>Anyone similar out there? Or anyone have differing points of view to offer? Thaaanks.</p>

2

<p>I’m not a Brown student or future Brown student, but I am currently a freshman in college. I can speak for kids who do not drink as, for the most part, I do not.</p>

<p>At Davidson, I am a member of an eating house, which is sort of a non-selective variation of a sorority. Additionally, I did not choose to live in substance-free housing (no banned substances or alcohol allowed on the hall, and you’re not allowed to return to the hall intoxicated). So basically, there is a fair amount of drinking around me, between my eating house and my hall, alone. </p>

<p>Fortunately, however, the real world is very rarely like the movie world, where you find kids standing around an uneasy friend, pressuring him/her to drink if s/he doesn’t want to. When you get into pledging…that’s possibly a different story…but for the most part, you probably won’t find as much pressure to drink-to-fit-in as you might be worrying about now. </p>

<p>People won’t look down on you for not drinking. Some might even look up to you for it. The vast majority of people will not really care that much about what you’re choosing to do. Usually at parties, if someone is asking you if you want something to drink, it’s not because they’re trying to pressure you…it just seems like the normal thing to do, to offer you a drink at the party. If people asking you if you want a drink really gets to you, grab a solo cup, a beer can, or a bottle and fill it with water or soda…then people will stop asking you if you want some, because you already have a drink in your hand. If you can’t make this happen, just continue to politely refuse for every offer of alcohol you get. Eventually, they’ll lay off. Someone who tries to force alcohol or drugs on you when you don’t want 'em is not your friend.</p>

<p>If you’re not into drugs and you find yourself around them, I would say the best thing you can do is get out of wherever you are. If there are people smoking in one room and the party is busted, you can sometimes get in trouble for just being there around the drugs.</p>

<p>I would say that if you’re worried about being ostracized for your choice to not drink, simply don’t advertise your choice. Don’t randomly bring it up to people, and don’t make a big deal over someone offering you a drink. If you don’t make a scene, it shouldn’t get to anyone. </p>

<p>I’ve had alcohol on only a few (less than five) occasions this whole year, and generally in extremely small amounts, and I can say that it’s not necessarily made the parties more fun to be drinking. You don’t have to have a solo cup in your hand to dance. You don’t have to be tipsy to ask out someone you think is cute. Alcohol will loosen you up a bit, yes, but there’s no true need for it. Frankly, there’s nothing fun about not remembering a great night…or about throwing up all over the place…or about being unable to stop sobbing over nothing. If you are going to drink, just know your limits.</p>

<p>You’ve got nothing to worry about :-)</p>

3

<p>Thanks for that! This was an extremely helpful post. :smiley: And props to you for not succumbing to substances that’ll screw with you!</p>

4

<p>^YAY!! If I do decide to go to Brown, you will definitely be my friend! I’m also against drugs and drinking for the EXACT same reasons and have the same fears!</p>

5

<p>I feel exactly the same way :). It’s good to know I’m not the only one.</p>

6

<p>I’m also going to be a freshman at Brown next year, but I have a different view. Just to put my opinion in the context of my life, I thought you should know that I had my first drink in 7th grade at 13, my first cigarette a year later at 14 in 8th grade, and my first joint (weed) at 15 in 9th grade. That being said, my drinking has steadily increased since 7th grade while I haven’t smoked at all in a year.</p>

<p>I’m not going to convince you that drinking and smoking are fine. However I strongly believe that drinking is entirely acceptable. But I thought you should know that since I’ve been around a drinking/drug culture since middle school I’ve seen my fair share of kids who don’t enjoy drinking or drugs. My experience is that these kids are almost never pressured into doing things they don’t feel comfortable doing (with the exception of the occasional ******* who likes to pressure other people). I can tell you that you shouldn’t be worried about being left out or feeling pressured into doing something about which you don’t feel comfortable, for people will generally base their friendships on things not nearly as shallow as drinking and drug use. </p>

<p>That being said, I think you will come to change your mind on your own. Before you turn 21 you will most likely have had something to drink because you will realize that in moderation, it’s entirely harmless and quite relaxing.</p>

7

<p>I don’t drink or do anything else of the sort. My friends do, but I don’t. I’m not totally comfortable with risks of immoderation, or being in any way less in control of my behavior.</p>

<p>Had I permission to bring my car, I’d probably be the designated driver who gets virgin mojitos at bars.</p>

8

<p>I have the exact same question. I’m glad someone has asked it. Now to wait for modestmelody with some words of wisdom…</p>