<p>So, I've been noticing lately how rampant they seem to be, especially anorexia, even though I know bulimia is around too. I have a friend on my cross country team who recently told me that she's suffering from bulimia. She told her parents, who are denying it and won't take her to a doctor, much less a therapist. So, in a way, I'm her therapist, which could be a good or bad thing. Do any of you guys know what kinds of things are good to say to people like this? Oh, and do yall see anything like this going on around your schools? Just a random observation I made, and for some reason felt the need to share!</p>
<p>Well, this is an interesting dillemma. Its infortunate that her parents are behaving this way. Its good that you are trying to be there for your friend, but there is only so much you can do. Eating disorders are not simply girls trying to be skinny, it usually has a deep emotional root to it, a void kind of. I cannot tell what is the right thing to say, I would suggest just listening to her, being there for her unconditionally. But you should really see if there is any way to get her treatment or at least therapy...if its at all possible...Good Luck.</p>
<p>I know this guy who is like 300 lbs and wears a shirt that says "I beat Anorexia"</p>
<p>I'm currently battling an ED myself--bulimia AND anorexia--and its so so so tiring. I am fortunate enough to have a dad who is willing to help and a whole treatment team of doctors and specialists but its STILL incredibly difficult. I can't imagine what its like for your friend. Support her to the best of your ability. </p>
<p>But I must say this..support is in <em>no way</em> a replacement for medical help. People with bulimia/anorexia have DIED after not having it for too long. Bulimia is especially dangerous because it screws up electrolytes in the body and for all you science people out there you know that can mean instant heart attack. </p>
<p>Being a runner myself, having to do sports and deal with an ED is super hard. Do everything you can to help her get through this. If you suspect that ANYTHING is off or she appears to be going downhill...you gotta do something. Whether it be talking to her parents (which will be awkward) or helping her think of ways to convince her parents that she needs help (maybe print out some info online about EDs and show them?)..you must help before it turns into something super serious if it isn't already.</p>
<p>woooo long rant. hah. yeah i sound dramatic but what isnt dramatic about eds?</p>
<p>and joev ^^ i've seen pics of a really fat guy wearing that shirt. it makes me laugh haha.</p>
<p>Wow, I'm really sorry to hear about your friend swimmer1 (and good luck with your recovery Le_Ambulance!)</p>
<p>As previous posters have said, eating disorders are very serious and need medical attention. Could you talk to another adult (ie. school nurse, teacher)? Can she go to her medical doctor by herself (without her parents' permission)?</p>
<p>thanks guys! yeah, I've been talking with her over the past couple of hours. apparently her parents are really strict/fit people. Like, "Emily, if you eat that...you might get fat, and that would hurt your running and make the boys hate you!" I mean, is it possible for a parent to be worse? She's the top runner in our state, and it's just sad to see her performance dropping, which is ironic because she thinks weighing less means faster times, when in reality that's not the case. Plus, her health should come before running! At least that's what I try to tell her.</p>
<p>You need to tell someone in a medical position, whether its a school nurse, or her doctor, someone. She might get mad at you, but ultimately thats a lot better than trying to do this on you own. An angry friend is better than a dead one. Just let her know that you're there for her.</p>
<p>thanks guys! yeah, I've been talking with her over the past couple of hours. apparently her parents are really strict/fit people. Like, "Emily, if you eat that...you might get fat, and that would hurt your running and make the boys hate you!" I mean, is it possible for a parent to be worse? She's the top runner in our state, and it's just sad to see her performance dropping, which is ironic because she thinks weighing less means faster times, when in reality that's not the case. Plus, her health should come before running! At least that's what I try to tell her.
It's bothering me to no end that her parents won't take her to get help. She's obviously in need: I mean if you could see/read all of the desparation emails she's writing me, you would know this girl is at the end of her rope. She's called me at 3 in the morning asking for help. I'm just trying to be that voice that listens, ya know?
On a larger scale, it really depresses me that our society leads girls (and guys!) to do things like this to their bodies. I mean, what message is pop culture sending to them? I think those new ads (Dove i think?) that emphasize realistic women are awesome. too bad it's negated by the hundreds of rail thin, gaunt women that are revered by preteens. Something needs to happen in our society that changes what we view as beautiful! Yeah, sorry this was a rant, too! Oh, and yeah I've seen that picture of the man. Hilarious!</p>
<p>If the parents still refuse to get her help, maybe you can tell a counselor about it?</p>
<p>that's exactly what I was thinking. it's just hard cause these ed therapists cost so much. I really have no clue where to start though! I actually think I might talk to her parents- even though yea it would be awkward. It would be worth it though, for sure.</p>
<p>Yeah it might be awkward, but I bet they will be very grateful to you later on. That's great you're determined to get her help.... you're a good friend. =)</p>
<p>I think you should have your friend go to a school nurse and tell her she needs help. I think then (at least at my school), the nurse tells the parents to get her help, and if they don't, it's consdiered like child abuse.</p>
<p>oh lord, the nurse's at our school are devils. It's a HUGE public school in the middle of the city. Not much money comes into the school. anyways, thanks so much yall for your help! I appreciate it (and I'm sure Emily will, too!)</p>