Essay Tips for You!

<p>Hi. I'm a senior, just heard back from my schools this last week. Someone PMed me from one of the "Class of 2012" threads asking for advice on how to get into that school and I started writing that PM before I realized that maybe other people could benefit from my advice too.</p>

<p>I'm no college admissions officer but like every good Asian, I've probably read more college admissions books than I've ever wanted. And like every good Asian, I realized that most of what's written in the admissions book didn't help me much at all.</p>

<p>I'm just going to present my outlook on the admissions essay--you can take my advice or you could leave it. You can shape my ideas to however you see fit, maybe take some of it and leave the other bits. I just want to try and help ease the process and point you in (what I perceive as) the right direction if I can.</p>

<p>Oh and in case you were curious, I've been accepted to JHU (BME), Duke, and UPenn; rejected from Stanford and Yale. Sure there were definitely other factors in my getting accepted (4.0 uw, 2220, IB Candidate, ECs) but I think there's a lot to be said for essays and that they shouldn't be underrated. Especially at the top tier schools, essays generally create the tipping factor.</p>

<p>On to the advice, yeah?</p>

<p>College admissions officers say that they don't mind reading admissions essays of any kind, but honestly, just putting yourself in their shoes--who really wants to read another essay about their grandmother dying or understanding teamwork by winning the latest soccer match? If there are giant blocks of text in front of me, I'm more likely to just scan through the essay instead of really trying to understand it. If the grammar's hard to decipher, I probably wouldn't spend long trying to read this essay and instead toss it into the reject pile.</p>

<p>All admissions officers have a ton of essays to read--which means a short amount of time allotted to each essay. You have to be easy to understand and incredibly effective with your words. Your sentences have to flow. And most importantly, you have to be /interesting/.</p>

<p>The easiest way to be interesting (I think) is to pay attention to the small details. Don't use sweeping generalities--it makes if seem as if your essay has no substance. Talk about the little things. For example if you were to write about the hospital you volunteer at, write about the worn faces of the patients there, write about the everyday feelings you had while working there, write about how you were working in pediatrics handing out the last cherry flavored lollipop to a little girl who smiled up at you--and you really felt for a moment like you were really making a difference. Write about how your stomach twisted with nausea the first time you looked into a fluorescent light microscope and the pale glow of the fluorescence under the lamp. Paint pictures. Tell stories. Bring your audience into the image. It's the little details that makes the essay human, makes the situation real.</p>

<p>I personally think that it's okay to be poetic as long as you don't overdo it. Keep your essay professional, but don't be afraid to throw in a pun or a well done parallelism. Don't be pretentious. Don't be ridiculously artsy. But don't be afraid either.</p>

<p>College essays are notoriously hard to write because they cover such a broad spectrum of activities, you aren't sure what the college admissions officer will like, and of course, you still have to portray something about yourself. My advice is to pick something specific about yourself that you want to portray to the college admissions officers instead of picking an activity. This positive trait is now the skeleton of the essay--now flesh it out with all those little details that really make the essay something you would write.</p>

<p>Here is the tricky part: you must never forget that your essay must express something about you, your characteristics, or your ambitions. You can give the admissions officers a narrative but what use of it is to them if they can't discern anything about you?</p>

<p>Er. I probably won't be able to give people specific advice about their essays (sorry, IB still owns my soul; but I'll be free during the summer!) but I can try to help with general questions?</p>

<p>I just hope I've helped anybody a little bit. (:</p>

<p>All these views and no responses. Thanks a lot! I made sure to bookmark this thread as I'm writing.</p>

<p>Thanks! I'll think of you as I write this fall. :p</p>

<p>I can use this for my English essay due tomorrow :)</p>

<p>wow. i wish i read this before i did my QB scholarship essay. i was so lost. thanks !!</p>

<p>I completely agree.</p>

<p>I wrote my essay on a very embarrassing experience of passing gas in an elementary English class. It was a very quirky, very funny essay, very ME.
I had about 4 people read it. One was my English teacher, and others were respected adults. None of them really liked it that well.
I stuck to my gut feeling in that this is the one essay that really captures what makes me me, except improved the essay stylistically, so this is the one I used for the common app and for USC. </p>

<p>I got rejected from all the top schools (international w/ signif aid)
but I got a full scholarship from USC.
When I was at the USC campus, my admission officer specifically met w/ me and told me that it was one of the funniest essays she had read. She also quoted a part of my essay, which really surprised and delighted me. </p>

<p>The way I take it is this. If all your other credentials are solid, and it comes down to the essay. As long as you put yourself into the essay, and they accept you. You will find your perfect fit because they accepted you for your personality. </p>

<p>I wouldn't suggest the same for a formal English essay, but it's something to consider for a creative writing class. </p>

<p>^________________________^</p>

<p>Hey, I'm glad to help. :D</p>

<p>Oh geeze, scholarships. I really need to apply to those. XD</p>

<p>@ lulupony - Congrats on the full scholarship from USC! :D I also think that applicants should take risks on their essays and portray who they REALLY are--because if the college doesn't like it, it probably wasn't right for them.</p>

<p>When it really comes down to it, I think that colleges at the top tier get 9283743453 students who are all qualified academically, each one of them with 82974832 EC's and it's really up to the essay to make the applicant memorable. So if you're going to go out, you might as well as go out with a boom. ;D</p>

<p>Great tips these will reall come in handy when i write my essay..i really wont to get into MIT</p>

<p>Another thing that I think helped me get into schools that I should not have (based upon my academics) is that I made some of my essays allegorical, some absuridist, and some rich with satire. In my quest to confuse the admissions officer (or at least make them think), I allowed them insight into some layers of me as a person, not just my observational skills.</p>

<p>The manner in which I constructed my essays were as follows:
I kept all of my ideas and thoughts regarding the prompts in a journal. It grew and combatted and thought, and retorted, and spat and punched itself. It was a constant struggle for understanding, and through that I would not little symbolisms/antecdotes/ideas.</p>

<p>Then when it came to writing my essay, I would take all of this information and spit it out in a more cohesive whole. I maintained an 'idea bank' at the bottom to always be ready to infuse more thought where-ever I so deemed it neccesary.</p>

<p>thanks for the tips!</p>

<p>Hmm looks good but I don't have time to read it now, however, I subscribed it.</p>

<p>Pretentious, unoriginal post about unique, unpretentious essays lauded by similarly unoriginal pretentious posters.</p>

<p>These are great tips for my admissions essay's and i would love to go to MIT. My chances arent very high but with a great essay and good SAT scores my chances go up immensley.</p>

<p>Hmm, I was wondering, what kind of essays are better? Those that introduce abstract ideas, but later furnish with an example, or just a play-by-play of an event with some afterthought?</p>

<p>@ Logos - Thanks for the bump since your useless post didn't really serve as anything else. Good luck finding those social skills, since you're clearly lacking them now. (:</p>

<p>@ Dudboi - I think that either would be good. If you can make the event REALLY interesting and make sure that the adcoms will be hooked on your every word to the very end, I think that example first with a connecting theme at the end tying everything together might make more of an impact. Of course, you run the risk of making your essay feel disconnected so you're going to have to figure out how to work in transitions really well.</p>

<p>illegiblyclear: this was very comforting to read and also very helpful! From one IB candidate to another, good luck in May!</p>

<p>These are some great ideas. I'm definitely going to keep them in mind for when I write an essay for my scholarship. I should get started, but its AP season! Yikes.</p>

<p>I love the idea of keeping a journal of ideas!</p>

<p>Very kind of you to submit your ideas. I emailed them to myself for review this summer when the writing of essays starts.</p>

<p>Thanks! That was surprisingly( and surprisingly because usually essay tips are all full of generic jargon) really informative. I'm always keeping in mind that while an event may seem tragic, sweeping and utterly defining to oneself, those overweening statements of bravado come of cliche and trite to adcoms. Also, girth is another thing- I hate having to cut things out because I'm a rat pack when it comes to writing but editing is absolutely necessary. Concise, easy to read essays that are flavorful and smooth pack the hardest punch!</p>

<p>I think that we can find some relevant ideas in the Dos and Don't.
Enjoy</p>

<p>Essay
The essay required for the Pre-Medical Recommendation Committee evaluation is good practice for the medical school application essay. The Committee or its chair may take the opportunity to criticize what you write. In any case, you ought to get some objective critic to go over your essay once, preferably someone who reads admissions essays.</p>

<p>The essay section of your medical school application ("Personal Comments" in AMCAS) is an important item and must be utilized to sell yourself. You must gain entry to an interview and the essay is the only truly personal statement you will have prior to the interview, and the only one that each member of the admissions committee will see. It is the one item most likely to distinguish you from a vast sea of applicants with credentials similar to yours. It should address points uniquely important about you. Keep it concrete and avoid generalizations. The readers will be interested in what you say as long as you stick to the topic. The topic is you, your interests, your experience, and history.</p>

<p>DOs & DON'Ts</p>

<p>DO fill this section with a well-organized and grammatical essay.</p>

<p>DO draw attention to anything in your application which is at variance with the usual and which might have a negative effect on an admissions committee, e.g. a poor semester. Explain it as best you can.</p>

<p>DO comment on any course you failed or on multiple withdrawals or pass/fail courses.</p>

<p>IF you are a transfer, DO give the reason for your transfer.</p>

<p>YOU MAY comment on extracurricular activities and employment, especially if they demand much of your time and energies during the school year, or if they gave important experiences leading toward a profession in medicine or dentistry.</p>

<p>DO comment on any weaknesses in your MCAT or DAT. Ask the Pre-Med advisor what constitutes a "weakness."</p>

<p>DO comment on time out of school or lack of continuity in your education.</p>

<p>IF married, especially with children, DO comment on how you plan to cope with the demands on your time and finances.</p>

<p>DO explain any medical or psychiatric illnesses.</p>

<p>YOU MAY present the origin of your interest in medicine or dentistry, what you have done to assure yourself that you have a realistic grasp of the profession, and what you envision your role in it will be. Be specific and concrete.</p>

<p>DON'T criticize your school, department, or teachers or assume a generally negative attitude.</p>

<p>DON'T espouse controversial social or political causes. (There isn't enough space to do justice to your viewpoint).</p>

<p>DO type neatly. Fill the space comfortably. Make it easy to read. Do not pad it with useless words. Do not use strange vocabulary. Avoid "awesome," "incredible," current cliches, and "valley speak."</p>

<p>DO remember who your readers are, and that they are hurried and must read many of these.</p>

<p>TIPS ON STYLE</p>

<p>Admittedly, it is hard to write about yourself. You must "sell yourself" without being boa****l or defensive. If you want to list all the many achievements of your life, look upon them as opportunities for which you are grateful, rather than conquests you have racked up.</p>

<p>Do not try to cover too many of the points above. You have only one page. Two or three good points are usually all you can adequately cover in one short page.</p>

<p>One page cannot do justice to a full biography, nor to a definitive treatise on your philosophy of medicine. Most applicants would do better keeping the page biographical. A narrative containing honest, concrete information about yourself is more interesting (believe it or not) than a labored abstract, discursive essay. The readers are interested in learning about you, not about medicine, life, or Walden Pond. At least they aren't interested in learning about those things from you at this point in their acquaintance with you.</p>

<p>The most frequent dilemma for students writing these essays is how to end them. My suggestions are two. First, there is usually no need to summarize a one page essay with some abstract conclusion, so keep it concrete. Second, it may be useful to finish by saying what project(s) of interest will engage you in the immediate future, i.e. the months when you can expect an interview. The advantage to including these is that the interviewer may ask you about something that you are currently doing.</p>

<p>APPLY THESE MAJOR PRINCIPLES</p>

<ol>
<li><p>Concreteness. Reread each paragraph and ask yourself the question, "Could this be said by any of the other thirty applicants to medical school?" If the answer is yes, then drop it.</p></li>
<li><p>Subjectivity/objectivity. Do not evaluate yourself; that is the job of the readers. You can give them the facts, but let them draw the conclusions. If you tell them what conclusions they are supposed to draw, you are usurping their function and they will find you silly or presumptuous. On the other hand, you can evaluate your experiences subjectively in the sense that you can say why or how important an event was to you. That is a legitimately subjective evaluation that only you can make. For example, a major medical experience in your life may have made an enormous impression on you and motivated you to consider medicine, but it would be presumptuous for you to say that it has made you a more sympathetic person or will make you a better doctor.</p></li>
</ol>

<p>MORE ADVICE ON WRITING PERSONAL ESSAYS</p>

<p>In general, the best use of the essay is to make it informative. In the context of how the essay will be read by a busy member of an admissions committee, the essay will be useful if it is about the applicant (as opposed to being about medicine in general), if it is concrete (as opposed to being general, abstract, or philosophical), if it is simple (as opposed to flowery or convoluted), and if it is straightforward (as opposed to self-evaluative or egotistical).</p>

<p>Because it is hard to write about yourself, there are several pitfalls that are common among applicants as they face the discomfort of having to present themselves on one page of an important application. One tendency is to avoid writing about yourself at all. The result is to write abstractly about the medical profession or about the qualities that you believe a good doctor should have, hoping, of course, that the reader will believe that you have acquired or are striving to acquire these qualities simply because you allege to hold them in high esteem.</p>

<p>A second pitfall is to believe that you can share with your readers some philosophical insight that you have gained about medicine, yourself, or life in general. My observation is that even though it is very important that you have gained such insights, the format and context of the admissions essay is such that hardly any reader will do justice to even the best expressed philosophical statement. Besides wasting the space where you may have written something concrete and informative, you may lose your readers' attention and cause them to miss the valuable and memorable items you did put into your essay.</p>

<p>Frequently abstract discussions sound like so many cliches. Often they sound pedantic and therefore inappropriate; an applicant need not instruct a group of doctors on the nature of medicine or about the qualities that make a good physician.</p>

<p>Literary quotations are almost always inappropriate.</p>

<p>In the context of this essay, simple vocabulary is better than trying to impress readers with unusual words (appropriately used scientific terms excepted). I recommend avoiding words that are current colloquialisms such as "awesome," "unbelievable," or "interface." Don't use "pursue" more than once and be sure to spell it correctly.</p>

<p>Be economical. You do not need to tell readers what you are going to tell them before you tell them and then summarize your message again at the end. The essay is only one page so omit the structural statements. Above all, do not tell the readers what conclusions they are supposed to draw from your arguments about how well prepared you are for medical school, and how you will be an outstanding physician. That is the job of the reader and you should let them do their job, namely, evaluating you. Give them the evidence; they will draw the conclusions.</p>

<p>So much for hints on style, now some points about content: students often have trouble deciding what topics to include in an essay. Information about your own life is old hat and may not seem interesting to you, but it will be of interest to someone who does not know anything about you other than the bare facts that appear elsewhere on your application form: MCAT scores, grades, where you are from, and where you have gone to school. Below is a list of suggestions, by no means comprehensive, but any two or three or four may fill a page. Remember that this is the only place where you can guarantee some particular information about yourself will be presented. References may relay some information, but they too may be filled largely with generalities. Also, readers will be interested in knowing which topics you consider important enough to spend your precious little essay space upon. Some topics may best be covered in an interview. However, if you want some topic to come up in an interview it is a good idea to put it in your essay.</p>

<p>• Your family background, especially as it relates to medicine or your education, or if you are an immigrant, will be of interest.</p>

<p>• Your own experiences in medicine, research, volunteer work, or major extracurricular activities around campus, are of interest.</p>

<p>• Hobbies that have been genuinely important to you are fair game.</p>

<p>• Whatever has been a major preoccupation with you over your college years is probably important.</p>

<p>• You may want to explain as best you can any obvious weaknesses in your record. Make such explanations brief and do not use your entire essay on apologies.</p>

<p>• It is usually appropriate to address any discontinuities in your education such as a leave of absence or a transfer of schools.
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