<p>zoosermom, I don’t know what my daugher was awarded because my ex won’t tell me. She will let my daughter look at the letter but won’t let her have it, because she knows she could give it to me and I could make a copy and that would take away her power. I know my daughter is almost an adult and she needs to stand up to her mother, but at the same time it is childish of her mother to even be playing this game to begin with. My daughter shouldn’t have to get into a screaming match with her mother to see documents that are rightfully hers.</p>
<p>Bluedanube, since it is not spelled who pays exactly how much or what for college expenses, it is going to have to go into negotiation. If your ex is not being cooperative when it has not come down to sharing info, it’s not going to be an easy negotiation. </p>
<p>You probably need to see an attorney to request the financials from your Ex. It’s really a simple situation. You need to know her financials, you will release yours as well, get the COA for the college chosen and someone has to make the split. It’s a shame that you were not involved earlier when she chose the schools. Unless your wife makes very little money (including any current spouse’s income), it is doubtful that your D is going to be getting any grants from FAFSA as the PELL only goes to very low income families. She will be allowed to take non subsidized Stafford loans regardless of the FAFSA results. More importantly is information regarding which colleges she is considering, the COA of those schools, and if she is likely to get any merit or financial aid from them. OF crucial importance is how much you are willing and able to pay. </p>
<p>My good friend and her husband let her stepdaughter know that they were willing to pay up to 2/3 of the COA of a Connecticut or NY state college. They did not bother to find out how much the mom or anyone else was going to pay. THey just came up with the numbers of what they were willing to pay. It turned out to be a problem as the D wanted to go to a private school that would not give anything other than loans and cost close to $50K a year.</p>
<p>Your daughter needs to do nothing of the kind. She needs to email the financial aid office at her school and simply ask for another copy or to log on to her school’s portal and print it out herself. I still don’t think you need to see the FAFSA, just the award.</p>
<p>There’s no reason for you to see the FAFSA, especially if she’s remarried. I’m not giving legal advice, but if you’ve been divorced a while, I wouldn’t count on a judge ordering her to give it to you-- again, especiallly if there’s a remarriage. The actual award letter is a different story. </p>
<p>I see a possible compromise here. Ask your ex to let your know the EFC–expected family contribution. IMO, she’s more likely to be willing to share this with you than the FAFSA form. If you know the cost of the school and the EFC, you can figure out the difference.</p>
<p>Personally, I wouldn’t demand to see the FAFSA. I’d send an email saying that before I pay anything, I need to see the actual awards. </p>
<p>At some colleges, you can pay a certain fee–which is usually quite small–to have bills sent to both parents. Then you can see each semester the amount of the bill and the loans and grants applied. If you know what schools your D is interested in, see if they have this option. Even if it isn’t listed as a formal option, you can call the registrar’s or bursar’s office and ask. I think it would solve your problem.</p>
<p>PS: If schools have the information on-line, then just ask your D for her PIN and tell her no PIN, no pay.</p>
<p>I’m going to go outside the box here, but most financial aid/tuition award info is now available online at the matriculated school. Your d is the one that should set up these accounts and passwords. You should only need the password (with your d’s knowledge and approval) to access the online info, view awards, COA, and tutition bills. </p>
<p>I’m assuming your d is being cooperative with you, and not complicit with your ex’s machinations.</p>
<p>cpt, yes, I am fully prepared to go to court to work out a negotiation since I am not getting anywhere with her. I think it’s just a shame that for our daughter’s sake she can’t work something out without having to go that route.</p>
<p>Jonri, that’s all I have been asking for is the EFC number from the SAR. I have not asked to see the FAFSA. I want a copy of the award letter as well. No luck on either front.</p>
<p>zoosermom I will ask my daughter if she can get a copy from the school. I am guessing that she doesn’t even know she can do that.</p>
<p>I wonder who it is with the issue here. Your demand for the FAFSA when you don’t actually need it, seems intrusive and controlling. Is there another motive? The FAFSA really isn’t your business. The EFC and award are.</p>
<p>bluedanube - </p>
<p>we have been trying to tell you - your daughter can easily get this information from the school. All she has to do is call the financial aid office.</p>
<p>I have a college freshman - her application was online and when she was accepted all her information was posted online - including the financial.
They don’t even send bills to me - it is all online under her.</p>
<p>Your daughter can give the school permission for you to have this information. The information on financial aid awards and tuition bills belongs to your daughter - NOT your ex-wife.</p>
<p>zoosermom, as I said in my last post, I have never requested a copy of the FAFSA, I only want to know what the EFC is and what the financial award is so that I can start planning how to finance my daughter’s tuition.</p>
<p>bluedanube - </p>
<p>the efc won’t tell you anything - it’s just a number. The award is what you need.<br>
see my post #29.</p>
<p>BTW - you can tell your daughter that it is ILLEGAL for her mother to electronically sign her FAFSA for her.</p>
<p>Actually, it’s the COA for the college chosen and how much the OP is willing/able to pay that is really the only thing that is the issue. If the student is Pell eligible, it is doubtful Mom is going to have much money to pay the costs, and the OP would know if the income range is that low. If Mom makes enough money so that she is not Pell eligible, the FAFSA EFC is not really of any interest to anyone. It’s just one other measure to estimate the EFC which guarantees you nothing but the PELL if it is low enough. Why do you want to know the EFC? Do you know what colleges she is considering, what they cost, and what you are willing to pay?</p>
<p>bluedanube, your d can also sign a FERPA release that would allow you access to all or part of her academic/financial/disciplinary/health issues, in all or in specific part.</p>
<p>If there is joint medical care involved, you might want the release for medical/emergency info.</p>
<p>Just something else to consider.</p>
<p>So cut out your ex wife and don’t create conflict where it doesn’t need to be. If your daughter can’t/won’t, then you call the office and request another copy, halve the family contribution and make your arrangements. Then email your ex and tell her you’ve made your own arrangements.</p>
<p>Some advice: minimize the drama around this issue. If your daughter has decided on a school, look up that school’s COA, divide by 2. There’s your upper limit of what you might pay. If you’re comfortable with this as both a minimum and a maximum of what you might pay per year, tell your D that this is what you’ll contribute every year and that anything left over after she graduates (or after year 4, whichever comes first) is hers. </p>
<p>If 1/2 of the COA is more than you’re willing to contribute, tell your D that you need to know her total COA, and that D can get it directly from the college. </p>
<p>In either case, you don’t need to pay the entire year at once anyway: see how the first semester/quarter goes, then adjust accordingly.</p>
<p>Don’t deal with your ex at all, especially if D is 18. If the ex feeds on drama, the best thing for you (and most maddening thing for her) is to take away the source of the drama.</p>
<p>JustaMom, thank you, I will ask her to call the FA office at the school. This will cause another set of problems but I am at a point where I need to know what is going on.</p>
<p>I hate that my daughter is caught in the middle.</p>
<p>The EFC is not anything you need to see, unless you want to run your financial numbers through the same calculator to prorate according to your EFC and your spouse’s.</p>
<p>
Why will that cause problems? Isn’t your daughter expected to communicate with her school?</p>
<p>DO you have a number that you are planning to pay?</p>
<p>It is your daughter’s responsibility to see that her bill gets paid. You should not feel badly about this. </p>
<p>Many schools don’t even send bills to parents anymore - they post them online to the kids account and the kids are responsible to see they are paid.
This is all a part of growing up.</p>