Extremely frustrated student

<p>Hi all. I'm an international student applying to:
Yale, Harvard, Amherst, Stanford, and Princeton.
My apps are all fine and have been received by the colleges.
My problem is financial aid. I live with my mother, who is not wealthy. She is an artist, enough said. With her financial details alone, I could qualify for full aid. </p>

<p>Unfortunately, there is also my father to consider. My parents never married; they split up when I was 4. Our relationship is hard to describe. When I was young, I saw him every weekend. But for the last 8 years he has been working in China, coming back every so often. And now I seldom see him. He is often quite cold towards me.</p>

<p>The problem is, he won't provide any financial details. I can't get him to fill out the NCP whatsoever. There is no way he will change his mind. What can I do? Can I get a fee waiver? Write a letter explaining the circumstances? It's difficult, because when I was young, he was not of those dads who ditches straight away and never makes contact with his children. Then again, he's never accepted the responsibilities of a father either. He pays a laughable amount of child support, and never paid for anything like language lessons or music tuition. The point is, he may as well not be my father, for all the support I get from him. But will my connection to him (a completely unprofitable and pointless one) stop me from getting the aid I desperately need?</p>

<p>Please give me advice! I need it fast, as financial aid deadlines are approaching!
Cheers!</p>

<p>You need to contact your schools and tell them your situation and ask them how to proceed. They may allow you some kind of waiver.</p>

<p>thanks! is it likely that I will get a waiver?</p>

<p>vergilfan1, there is no way we can tell you if it is likely or not that the school(s) will grant you a waiver. It is at the discretion of each school to make this determination. Some may do so…and others may not. </p>

<p>I know this won’t make you feel better…but even some U.S. citizens have difficulty with non-custodial parent forms and willingness to pay for college. Most colleges that require the form will want you to make a good faith effort to get the information. That your dad hasn’t contributed in the past doesn’t mean he CAN’T contribute…it just means he hasn’t.</p>

<p>So…contact each college and ask.</p>

<p>If he paid child support, you’re unlikely to get a waiver. Many parents don’t want to pay and their kids just need to go where they can afford unfortunately.</p>

<p>Did you apply to any financial safety schools that you can afford?</p>

<p>My concern is that you won’t get the waiver because your dad has been in your life. Refusing to fill out the paperwork is not enough. If it was, then all NCPs would simply refuse and the process would fall apart.</p>

<p>I have completed these waiver requests as my daughter has never met her…um…“other half” (I call him sperm donor since that’s all he’s contributed). You must contact each college directly. Their processes are different. Many have a form for you to complete, some do not. Most also require that you get 2 letters from various people (minister, counselor, doctor) who can verify your statements. </p>

<p>Bottom line is that, if this person is PAYING for you (child support, whatever)…then the college of course holds them responsible for your tuition as well. If you have not seen this person in many years, and he does not contribute to your upbringing financially, then you will probably get the waiver. That’s my GUESS, anyway. But you will need to show that you do not have contact, and he does not pay. Even then of course, it’s up to the college. Because it would be easy for EVERYONE to just say “meh, he’s not paying, won’t fill it out”. I doubt I’ll know if they accepted my waiver request until/unless my daughter is admitted and we see a financial aid offer. Her academic and financial safety schools are FAFSA only so we may never know. You’ll have to apply, in order to see - I don’t think anyone can guess that. BUT…one thing you COULD do is request a copy of the waiver request. If you read it and find he does not fit the categories (example: I think one question on one school’s form says something like “Have you had any contact with your non-custodial parent within the last 2 years?”)…then you might be able to better tell if you have a chance at being granted the waiver.</p>

<p>thanks for all the helpful advice! Oh, by the way, I have a university scholarship here in my home country enabling me to attend local university for free. So don’t worry, if I don’t receive aid, I’ll just have to give up the Ivy league and stay here.</p>

<p>hmm. The only money he paid us was child support, and in New Zealand it’s a legal requirement to do so. It would be illegal not to pay…</p>

<p>Child support means they’ll probably want him to complete the form. It’s illegal not to pay in the US too. Doesn’t mean that everyone does it. I am proof of that. My D’s Non-Custodial…person has not paid a dime since she was about 2 years old. If you are receiving child support, they probably will not grant a waiver. In my opinion.</p>

<p>How much financial aid do US universities offer foreign students…with or without a NC waiver?</p>

<p>^ There is no one answer for that. Then entire range from nothing to all. Every school is VERY different. Most aren’t government run, they’re “private” companies who each set their own rules. The government run (state) schools typically use state taxes to supplement local students so much of their aid goes to those students.</p>

<p>International students cannot receive any federally funded financial aid. They can, however, receive school institutional aid. Some schools give it and some schools do not…to international students.</p>

<p>^^^</p>

<p>True…</p>

<p>And, some offer merit $$ to int’ls, and some do not.</p>

<p>I think that all the schools i’m applying to (see above) only operate on a ‘need’ basis, no merit scholarships. can somebody confirm this?</p>

<p>The schools you listed meet full demonstrated financial need for US students and they do not offer any merit-based assistance. These same schools don’t necessarily meet the full demonstrated need for their international students. They are also harder to get into coming from the international pool than from the US pool.</p>

<p>^^</p>

<p>True…</p>

<p>I was speaking in generalities for int’ls, not specific to your schools.</p>

<p>Hey but I thought they were all need-blind (except for Stanford). And I thought there was no international quota!? Hey, could everyone who has commented on this post please go to my other posts and chance me? It would be good to have a rough idea of whether or not this is even worth worrying about…</p>

<p>

I think the chances are excellent you can go to school some where for free.</p>

<p>sorry what do you mean?</p>

<p>vergil…I don’t think folks here will “chance you” on this section of this forum. Perhaps others will navigate their ways to the “chance me” posts you have somewhere else. I know <em>I</em> won’t do chances for particular students.</p>

<p>But I will say…you have applied to a number of HIGHLY competitive schools with very low admit rates…some under 10%. Do the math…that means that up to 90% do not get accepted. Many VERY qualified applicants are in that 90% of rejected students. These schools are a tough admit for almost all students. There are no guarantees…and therefore chance me threads are not particularly useful for these highly competitive schools.</p>