Feeling upset about college

Student Lounge College Life
1

Hi, all,

If you can tell by my previous threads, it’s easy to see that I don’t exactly love my college life.

The first semester was absolute hell, and the second one has gotten a (bit) better but it’s still not what I have expected.

I am originally from NC and go to college in southern FL. I had always been interested in art - in fact the only thing I was ever interested in and have ever been good at. I applied to five schools, all out of state since I grew up hating my small town and wanting something more. Decided on Ringling College of Art + Design in Sarasota because it was in a relatively appealing area, and seemed to have the best illustration program to me. Just a bit of background.

Moving along to first semester, I realized that the school was too small both in area and in people. The campus is insanely tiny and there are very few options as far as food / grocery shopping goes, especially since I don’t have a car. There are fewer people then there were in my high school graduating class and it’s just annoying seeing the same people every day, because most of them I just can’t connect with.

That being said, I have a lot of trouble making friends. I’m shy and jumpy, but when I get comfortable with someone I can be very outgoing. I love people and love to surround myself with friends.
I have made a few “friends”, people who invite me to hang out and eat with them, but I just don’t feel any connection to them. I feel like we aren’t similar, and whenever I’m with them I just think about how I’d rather be at home alone.

All of my time is spent on homework. This school is infamous for the large amount of coursework they put on their students - sometimes it’s insane. I’m on spring break right now and have had 3 paintings to finish, so haven’t really been able to enjoy my time at home too much.
And even when I do pour my heart and soul into my work, I end up with subpar grades. The grading system is extremely competitive at this school, and art just seems to come easier to most of the other students (or they constantly pull all-nighters which I refuse to do). It sucks when I think a piece is amazing, turn it in and end up with a C or a low B. I don’t half-ass any of my work. Most of the teachers make me feel really bad about myself and my art.

For some good things - I do like my classes. They’re all art related which is good, despite the insane amounts of work that come with them. Although I don’t have many friends, it gives me more time to focus on my work. I think I’d go crazy if I had to take any gen-ed classes, which is a big reason of why I didn’t go to a typical college.

But the emptiness is always there. I miss home. A lot. All of my friends have stayed in hours-length of our hometown, and get to see each other and their families often. My boyfriend is 10 hours away from me and it hurts so much. I’m dreading going back to school and being alone again in that hellhole.

Of course I’ve thought about transferring. My parents have been super against it from day 1 because I’ve always been that amazing artist kid, and am (considered) very smart. They think if I pack my stuff up and go back home to a more “regular” college (but still studying art), I’ll be giving everything up and kissing a potentially nice job goodbye. So, in other words, they won’t let me transfer.
The part that really cements this is I have already paid the lease for an apartment next year. My parents kind of jumped on it right away, so even if I did want to go somewhere else next year I couldn’t.

I just feel so defeated. There are times where I kind of feel optimistic about my school and really do enjoy it, but at the end of the day I am not happy and don’t think I ever have been here. Spending this break with my boyfriend, family, and other friends has really reminded me how much I love it here and would love to be closer to them. Not to mention a school with a workload that actually lets me breathe sounds amazing. But it just cannot happen.

Any tips? Either on what I should do, or how to make my experience less dreadful. Thanks in advance.

2

You have a bunch of similar posts. Have you sought out professional counseling at the college? https://www.ringling.edu/healthservices

3

As someone with a degree in art and someone who has had many friends and colleagues in different art schools, my experience has been that the workload is intense no matter where you go to school. All nighters are very common. Having class all day and then lab time assigned for the midnight hours is common. Having huge ridiculous time consuming projects is common, and it only gets worse when you get a real job. Most of the people I know work long hours and usually are assigned more projects than there is time for in a day.

It sounds like you aren’t comfortable with putting in the amount of time needed. I don’t think transferring will solve that. Maybe it’s time to look at options besides art or maybe something where art could be the Minor. This is probably not what you want to hear, but if you are struggling this much now, I don’t see how you will enjoy this as a career.

If you do want to stick it out, you need to figure out why your pieces are receiving low marks. Most art professors don’t assign grades arbitrarily. Talk to your professors. Find out why you are loosing points. Is it for turning in work late, incomplete, bad aesthetics / symmetry, piece doesn’t embody the topic, bad craftsmanship, etc? Then you need to determine what you can do to improve in those areas.

As far as the social aspect, I think transferring would make a huge difference. I was going to suggest you seek out social opportunities outside of campus until I read you don’t have a car. Sarasota isn’t an area to live in without a car. There’s lots going on in St.Pete and Tampa, Bradenton has an ice skating rink, even in Sarasota there are some very nice coffee shops and restaurants, the Bayfront Park is a nice place to go, there are museums and lots of outdoor activities boating, swimming, snorkeling, hiking, etc, but without a car, you really can’t get involved in any of that. I’d look for a school located in an urban area where everyone walks and a car would not be needed. This way you’d have options for involvement both on and off campus.

4

Make a friend who has a car. How do your friends get around? I’ll agree it’s hard to get to the places you might like to go without one. Siesta beach is beautiful.

All nighters as Nicole said are universal for most art schools That’s a good place to start to make friends. Participate and get your work done too.

My D went to Ringling for CA. She slept under the desk in the computer lab to get things done. It’s hard work but pays off. I met many of her illustration friends but never one that didn’t stay up all night to complete work.

And critiques are tough. They feel personal because you’ve put a lot of work into something that is your own creation. I understand.
But your professors are trying to make your best art even better. It’s not about you as a person in the least.
My D dreaded critiques—she used to say everyone would feel torn apart, lick their wounds for a few hours, review what was said, then get back to work.
The best students learn through critiques to look at their art more objectively and then try whatever is suggested by the professor to improve even when they disagree with the professor about the assessment My D would take notes during a critique—it made it more objective and she could analyze better later on when she didn’t feel defensive.
Two things may happen. One is that you stretch yourself and your art skill expands and you realize the professor was right. Number two is that your skill expands but you still like your first version better. But you win in both scenarios by growing as an artist. This is why you go to school.

The saddest students in my opinion are those who refuse to grow because they can’t take the suggestions/critiques and try new approaches to their art. Their art unfortunately looks the same after 4 years as it did on day one.

Good luck to you!

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@happy1
Yes. Went for the entirety of first semester, a few times second semester. There’s only so much that they can do unfortunately.

@NicoleGreen
I totally agree with you. I do think that there is a difference in the intensity of an art conservatory vs. a university with an art program, though. Especially since my current one is like, #2 or something in the country. Lots of people (mostly animation majors which I am not) drop out solely due to the high expectations and workloads. Some people can handle it but as someone with anxiety / depression / OCD / e.t.c. I’m just not sure it’s for me and it’s wearing me down fast.

@gouf78
If I end up staying next year, I will have a car. Although most people / my friends are far too busy to go out regularly, even on weekends.
I am very good at accepting critiques and am more than comfortable with it. Although I do think some of the teachers are not fit in what they say, or are wrong and unfair. This is only a small portion. I really appreciate the teachers who back up their grades with both explanations and improvements.
I am often critiqued in class to high praise, both from my teacher and fellow students. But then I’ll get my grade back and it will be very poor, which is confusing.

6

OP, to be blunt – it appears that you are not willing to work as hard as your classmates. That may be the reason for disappointing grades.

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As far as transferring to a different art school because of load, I think the work load is going to be very similar at any top art institute. If you transfer to a regular university with an art program that will be hit or miss. I know some where the work load is actually worse because they make you do close to the same amount of art, usually a full load, but then add in core classes on top off that. At other schools, half your classes are core classes and half art, so in that sense, you are only doing half the amount of art in a semester. That might be helpful to you, except for the fact that you said you’d hate taking any non art classes.

Where I think you might find a benefit in transferring to a different art school is with the professors. It doesn’t sound like you have a great relationship with the ones you have. Finding a school where you feel more comfortable with the faculty and can benefit more from their advice, might help greatly. It doesn’t sound like you are really getting a lot out of your critiques. It also sounds like there is a major break down of communication if you are receiving high marks during oral critiques, but low marks upon final grade. If your professors are unable to explain to you why that is occurring, then it might be time to find new professors somewhere else, as these ones just aren’t working for you.

It’s great you’ll have a car next year, I think that will help if you decide to stay. I used to live in Tampa, and we seriously considered moving to Sarasota, so I’m semi familiar with it. It is a very nice town. I’d try to explore it some, and see if you find anything outside of school you’d be interested in getting involved in. I know you won’t have tons of free time, but I think you’ll be surprised how much simply getting out, getting a change of scenery, can help improve your mood. Little things likes studying or working at the park or coffee shop verses the same old room at school, can make a huge difference. That’s one of the reasons I mentioned the park I did. It’s a beautiful place not too far from campus to sit and sketch by the water. Really peaceful. Great for calming anxiety.

I also suffer from anxiety issues, and it wasn’t until I was out of school and in the work field that I realized art wasn’t the right career for me. I just couldn’t handle the stress. The building could catch on fire, and I’d be calm and in control, but give me a project deadline I’m struggling on coming up with a creative solution to, and my anxiety would go through the roof.

It’s sort of ironic, my sister, who doesn’t hold an art degree, was recently hired as a graphic designer for a fairly high profile company. They had seen work she posted online as a hobby and reached out to her. Her first week at work was definitely an adjustment period. She didn’t realize how stressful the job was going to be. How many projects would be thrown at her at once, and how quickly they’d need them done. I think she had 4 or 5 projects they wanted done on the first day alone, and they didn’t even get her through orientation and her computer set up until after lunch. In general, my sister handles stress well. She doesn’t have anxiety like I do, and even for her, it’s been stressful at times. Overall, she does love her job and says the company is great to work for. She doesn’t regret taking the job, but I can tell you hearing her talk about it, only makes me 100% sure I made the right decision in switching careers.

That’s why I mentioned before are you sure about art as a career. It can be stressful and time consuming. It isn’t really a 9 to 5, leave work at the door type deal. If you are sure, then I think the next step is to decide if this is what you really really want more than anything else. Is the long term payoff of graduating and landing your dream job worth being miserable right now?

As far as I can tell you have two choices.

  1. Stay and try to make the best of a bad situation because your long term goals are more important to you than your current happiness. You don’t seem to like the school, the work load, the professors, the other students, or your social life. It’s not realistic to think so many issues will be resolved or simply go away, so the only reason I see to remain is because graduating from Ringling is going to open doors to your coveted career.

Or

  1. Be ok with not graduating from a top art institute, and find a school that is the right fit for you, whether that’s another art school or even a less intense regular university. Find a school where you will feel comfortable. I don’t see how you could end up any more miserable transferring somewhere else. If you put the research in, you should be able to find a school that is a much better match for you.