Financial Aid Appeal

How does it sound? And is it too long?
Dear Appeal Committee,
I fully understand your reasoning behind my denial for financial aid. At the time of my request, my GPA did not meet the standards set by XXX. I am writing this appeal in order to thoroughly explain the circumstances that led up to my current academic status. I would like to ask you to please reconsider granting me financial aid.

From my senior year of high school on through the 2014-2015 school years, I have had many complications involving my family life. The animosity and tension building in my household reached its peak my senior year of high school; I had no choice but to abruptly move out of my childhood home. Even after my departure from their home, my mother and step-father continued to put strain on me emotionally as well as mentally. At one point, communication between us was minimal if not non-existent. On the other hand, I had my biological father who could go weeks, sometimes months, without speaking a word to me. He made minimal contributions while I attended high school as well as college. All of these factors put a hold on my emotional and mental states.

I thought that going off to college would help me to leave all of this disappointment behind, but I was unable to shake my past. All these factors contributed to a college transition that was overwhelmingly unbearable. The stress and adjustment made it difficult to pay attention in new settings of a college class. When the time came to study I found myself pondering over the turmoil in my family instead of pondering over my studies. Although I was fully aware of XXXs group programs, whether they were for emotional issues or for tutoring, I found myself not wishing to partake in them. I did not want people knowing about the brokenness in my personal life or about the struggle with maintaining a higher GPA. I was feeling loneliness, embarrassment, as well as shame and it showed in my academic performance.

After finally coming to terms with my previous mindset and apprehensions with my relationships, I now realize that I have an incredible opportunity to be a part of XXX’s student body. I now truly believe that, through hard work and dedication, I can actually do something meaningful with my life. To get to that stage, I have to understand where I have faltered. Although I cannot change the mistakes I made in my first year of college, I can at least start atoning for them now by consciously making the decision to stay focused and apply myself. I now understand that tutors, study sessions, and group programs are not there to shame me, but instead are there to help me succeed. In setting aside my previous mindset, I know that I will be able to appreciate and take advantage of all the programs and sessions that XXX has to offer.

I am fully aware that financial aid is a privilege, not a right. I understand that without financial aid, I will essentially be putting myself through college. Keeping that in mind, I am storing up finances in any ways that I can. I live in the very small town of Oakwood, TX so I have been doing odd jobs or manual labor for family and friends in order to save up money. Currently, I have a job position open for me in XXX. Upon return to XXX, perhaps I will have a more reliable means of building funds towards my college expenses. However without financial aid, even with a steady paying job, I will still not have the funds necessary to continue my education at XXX.

I thank you for kindly taking the time to read my appeal letter and I hope you will reconsider granting me financial aid.
Sincerely,
XXX

the letter is too long and really does not say anything

Keep it simple;

kill first paragraph/kill last paragraph , since it had nothing to do with why you were unsuccessful

Concisely explain what happened that contributed to your being unsuccessful.

Come up with an action plan to help you be successful (you failed to do this)

Thankyou very much for your feedback.

@sybbie719

How does this sound?

To the Appeal Committee,
I fully understand your reasoning behind my denial for financial aid. At the time of my request, my GPA did not meet the standards set by XXX. I am writing this appeal in order to thoroughly explain the circumstances that led up to my current academic status. I would like to ask you to please reconsider granting me financial aid.

Upon enrollment to XXX, I was dealing with family turmoil that was weighing heavily on my emotional and mental state. I thought that going off to college would help me to leave all of this disappointment behind, but I was unable to shake my past. All these factors contributed to a college transition that was overwhelmingly unbearable. The stress and adjustment made it difficult to pay attention in new settings of a college class. When the time came to study I found myself pondering over the disorder in my family life instead of pondering over my studies. Although I was fully aware of XXX’s group programs, whether they were for emotional issues or for tutoring, I found myself not wishing to partake in them. I did not want people knowing about the brokenness in my personal life or about the struggle with maintaining a higher GPA. I was feeling loneliness, embarrassment, as well as shame and it showed in my academic performance.

After finally coming to terms with my previous mindset and apprehensions with my relationships, I now realize that I have an incredible opportunity to be a part of XXX’s student body. Through hard work and dedication, I can actually do something meaningful with my life. To get to that stage, I have to understand where I have faltered. Although I cannot change the mistakes I made in my first year of college, I can at least start atoning for them now by consciously making the decision to stay focused and apply myself.

If granted financial aid I will take advantage of the educational aid offered by XXX. I now understand that tutors, study sessions, and group programs are not there to shame me, but instead are there to help me succeed. Whether I am struggling or succeeding in a class, I will take full advantage of the academic aid that XXX has to offer in order to bring my GPA above and beyond the set standards. I will also participate in more extra credit projects and seminars offered by my professors to raise my grades. I am also going to register for classes during the winter-mester and may-mester in order to improve my GPA.
I thank you for kindly taking the time to read my appeal letter and I hope you will reconsider granting me financial aid.
Sincerely

OP- here’s the deal.

Your family turmoil- not relevant. Your stress- not relevant. Loneliness, embarrassment and shame- not relevant.

To the appeal committee-
This letter outlines the steps I will take to bring my GPA up to the required level to reinstate my financial aid, and I am grateful for the opportunity to appeal your decision.

1- Attend office hours, review sessions, and work with the tutoring center when necessary.
2- Register for winter-mester and may-mester to help get me back on track to graduate on time, and to improve my GPA by better academic performance. I will continue to attend the group sessions and access the other resources in place.
3- Work with my adviser on course selection to make sure that I’ve got a manageable workload and can succeed in the classes I take.

I am excited and energized and want to take full advantage of the academic opportunities at XXX. Thank you for considering my appeal.

Leave the atonement, brokenness, disorder out of the letter. That’s what counseling is for.

And make sure you do in fact attend group or individual counseling sessions and use the tutoring resourcees available so you can be successful and leave the past behind you! These resources are there to help you!