<p>I think it depends on the kid etc. My D calls once most days – she is a freshman. Sometimes we send an email. Since she is a Freshman, I am assuming it will fall off in time as college becomes normal routine. My S contacted me way less often. Basically, I let them do the contacting.</p>
<p>My ds communicates several times a day with various members (brothers, parents, etc) of our family – by phone, skype, email, text, facebook, etc. But he’s a very gregarious, communicative type and is probably communicating with his friends even more.</p>
<p>My D has been in college for a little over a month, and she’s very inconsistent with contact. One week she called every day, one week she only called once. But she does send off a text or an email if she needs to, and I even got one letter! I try NOT to contact her unless there’s something I really need, or I’ll text her when I know she’s had a sports event and give her encouragement.. just a ‘good luck today!’ or something, so she knows I’m thinking of her. </p>
<p>It can be several days without contact, and I’m totally ok with that. I think if it was less than once a week I’d get a little nervous.</p>
<p>My freshman D has been at school about a month. We don’t hear from her nearly as much as we had thought/hoped. She calls every couple of days, but usually just for a specific question and rarely has time to really talk. Very busy, always on the go. Seems to be adjusting well and loving her new experiences. Mixed feelings for us, we’re very happy that things are going so well for her, but a little sad that she doesn’t have more time to share these new experiences with us. We are debating whether to try to require her to call us once a week at a pre-arranged time, or just let her have her space.</p>
<p>You should learn instant messaging. It was the most successful way to have a little contact from our freshman. Not long conversations, mind you. Turns out that she thought emails took too long to read and so wouldn’t read 'em, much less reply to them. </p>
<p>She would call, but usually as she walked from one place to another. Kids nowadays are always multi-tasking!</p>
<p>like jude, our D1 is very inconsistent with communication, but that’s fine. </p>
<p>Believe it or not, she contacts us more now than she used to initiate conversation when she was living at home…No really long conversations (we’ll probably wait until she’s home on break), but lots and lots of texts, IM’s, video chats (with her sister), etc. If I need to initiate or have a question that’s not urgent, I usually e-mail so she can open it at her leisure.</p>
<p>The first week my mom called me daily (I also called her a few times to ask dumb questions about where to get something or what to do about certain things) and then she finally calmed down. Now we talk on the phone about every three days. I’ll occasionally text her with something like “hey can you call X and take care of Y?” or “I got X% on my test!!!”. We pretty much just call when we have something significant to talk about and we never really talk for more than 10 minutes.</p>
<p>My D calls once a week, and will text occasionally if she needs something or information quickly. She called yesterday while walking from one activity to another. I keep a list at home with things I want to remember to tell her or ask her about in these weekly calls. I had a roommate once who talked to her mother every day on the phone, I thought that was excessive.</p>
<p>My daughter who is a freshman calls me everyday, much to my surprise. I was expecting me to be the one to initiate the calls just because she has seemed to crave the independance since her older sister went to college in 2006.</p>
<p>I think mine has lost his cell phone and is now totally on college e-mail. I have not heard from him in a week.</p>
<p>My oldest daughter, now a Junior calls for brief chats every day, sometimes on weekends, several times a day. She and I have always been chatty together. </p>
<p>My youngest daughter, a freshman might call once a week, ususally when theres a question or she needs something. Never was a chatty kid and very independent. </p>
<p>I fire off a brief chatty email to both about three times a week. Not expecting a reply, its for me and to let them know Mom is thinking about them. Funny they still want mail from home, cartoons, notes and small care packages…
That doesnt seem to go out of style, least not with my girls…</p>
<p>My D, a freshman for a month, has gradually decreased her calls from daily, to not at all this weekend. The calls are usually brief, while walking somewhere, and always initiated by her. She and I will occasionally text each other with an observation or joke. Her brother seems to see how she’s “doing” (? mood or something) daily on Facebook. I suspect he will never communicate if and when he leaves home. At 15, when he travels, his only messages are texted; "Pick me up "or "Can I go to. …“s house?”</p>
<p>I have 2 S’s. One a freshman and one a senior. </p>
<p>Senior S has sent maybe 3 emails total throughout college. He calls sporadically. I would say we talk every 7-10 days. We text once in a while but only if there is an important message, never just to say “hi”. </p>
<p>Freshman S has been at sch. since mid Aug. I think he has called us twice (for information, not chat). He doesn’t do email either. I have called him about once a week. A couple of calls have been good (he was talkative). A couple I could tell he was obviously not interested in talking to me at the time. Have texted some. Sometimes he replies, sometimes not.</p>
<p>My friend next door talks/IM’s with her soph. D almost daily.</p>
<p>S, a Senior, has fairly consistently called about once a week; he IM’ed a lot as a freshman when he saw I was online, but as the action has shifted to Facebook (which I don’t have and don’t want), he rarely does that anymore.</p>
<p>Unlike most Freshman females described here, D was adamant about not wanting us too involved in her life and went almost incommunicado for the first 3 weeks of school. Now she calls when she is frustrated with something academically, which is happening more than once a week at present as she adapts to the first crunch time and the differences in academics in college. (As for texting, although she had 900 texts her first month on campus, only 3 were to me.) Hopefully we can find some kind of middle ground over time and I’ll occasionally get to talk to her when she feels like things are going well.</p>
<p>OP here-thanks for all of the replies. Glad to see my S and his lack of needing to talk to me as often as I would like is normal (especially for boys!).</p>
<p>He has never been much for talking on the phone. I have no desire to get involved with Facebook and I’m pretty sure that’s his favorite way to communicate with friends.</p>
<p>It’s a funny thing about cell phones–sometimes I really think it has created a strange dependency between young adults and their parents. But, on the other hand, I’m so glad we have them because getting in touch at short notice can be accomplished. I have four really independent sons, three of whom are in college now. I sort of wait for them to call, but they can go up to a week or two without communication. At ages 23 and 21 I don’t think that’s wrong. I’d rather wait for them to really want to communicate, but I do push it and call them if it’s been a while. I’m really happy that their lives are full. The third is a freshman and we have heard from him about twice a week for the first month of school, usually at my initiation. As long as he happily takes my calls, I figure I am doing well!</p>
<p>My d, a freshman for two weeks, called a number of times during the first 2 days to ask where I put certain things that I helped her unpack. Then on Sundays a longer phone call to let us know how she is doing. Our contact has been complicated by Hurricane Ike- I am in Houston, she is in NJ. We only just got power restored today, so the home phone was out and the cell phone was sporadic. </p>
<p>I intend to email for things that require information based stuff- today I emailed the medical insurance info that she forgot and directions on how to get a prescription filled. I will also include general chat from my end. </p>
<p>We pretty much agreed that she will call at least once a week on weekends to let us know what’s up. She has also emailed a couple of info- only type things, like the orchestra is going to Europe in Jan, she wants to go and oh guess what, it will cost $1700.00.</p>
<p>S, as a freshman last year, dutifully called on Sunday the first 3 weeks. It was obvious that these calls on a set schedule and whether there was anything to ask or say, or not, were mutually painful. </p>
<p>I said OK-- lets just communicate when and however we feel like it. There was not a lot of communication. He didn’t ever contact us for “how do I’s”</p>
<p>This year the political events and economic news (he’s an econ major) have resulted in a flurry of emails.</p>
<p>BTW–we took a father-son only trip to Costa Rica at the end of the summer after the freshman year. Face to face, we “caught up.” Apparantly, we both like talking better face to face than daily or weekly phone or internet.</p>
<p>My freshman daughter was calling me multiple times a day the first week or so - mostly noodling over her class schedule. Now I usually get at least a text or email every day and a good phone call every few days. She webcams with her little sister pretty much every evening. She sounds really happy there and busy. I missed her a lot the first week but now I’m feeling as if everyone is where they need to be. DD2 is really blossoming with the stage to herself at home. </p>
<p>I finally sent a care package on Friday. That’s a lot of work!</p>
<p>Two sons: I usually hear from them once a week, more if they are sick or want to share some news. My junior will call if he is excited about a class or a discussion he had with a professor, the freshman: not so much. We text and email sometimes, though emails to them never get an answer. They will usually always text back immediately. I occasionally send them a note or news clipping they might be interested in, which usually results in no phone calls, texts, or emails.</p>