My boyfriend came to my graduation, not his parents. I went to his graduation, but my parents didn’t.
True. Plus, if it were me, I’d rather just have my family and my boyfriend…
Is this graduation in December? Or not until the spring?
This might have been answered already.
My DH and I traveled to our daughter’s boyfriend’s graduation because he told us he was proposing afterwards. We got to meet most of the immediate family before the wedding festivities, which was nice. I doubt we would have gone otherwise, unless he especially wanted us there.
I asked this on various occasions but don’t recall seeing it answered. Because if Spring, I thought let time and the relationship play out a little!
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I think it’s really important to get her parents’ feedback. As much as the event is about her, it’s also quite possible that it also important to the family - perhaps in a way that would not fully welcome you.
The fact that you would be there not for your own child’s celebration but their daughter’s could make your attendance feel graver in a way. Or you could be crashing a rare family gathering prompted by the graduation.
Otoh, if they want to share the event with others to make it more celebratory, you would increase the happiness quotient.
The graduation is to celebrate the graduate, but in fact, it’s a rite of passage that is also important to the family. This one marks a special shift in life staus – end of student-hood and launch to real life, a permanent address that isn’t yours, etc. If the GF parents want to do this without you, there will be another that carries less emotion and sentiment.
I really like @cinnamon1212 's advice. It gives everyone room to say what’d be best for them and to think the best of each other.
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Also, if GF’s family lives far away, having everyone meet at this occasion may actually be the most low key way to do this, rather than having either set of parents traveling by plane to meet up. Let us know what you decide.
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We did not go to my future dil’s graduation. We knew they were about to get engaged and had only met her family for 5 minutes at an airport once. They had been dating for 4 years. The reason’s we didn’t go were 1) it was a plane ticket for us. 2) Son was studying for vet school finals which were the next week, 3) She already had my son, her parents, 4 siblings and one set of grandparents coming from a couple hours away to the graduation. We met them over the summer this year after the kids got engaged when we already had a trip planned to visit and her parents decided to drive up to see us. Worked out well. I think it is what the GF and her family think is best.
I just don’t want to miss the follow up report if they wind up going!
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