<p>Basically, all of my college friends have been warning me to not spend money on a girl unless we are in a serious relationship and that a lot of college girls tend to want guys to spend a lot of cash on them--they said girls mostly will want guys to take them out to eat which gets expensive pretty quickly.</p>
<p>How accurate is this? I would think that since most people in college have a limited amount of money that it would be acceptable to go Dutch most of the time?</p>
<p>my boyfriend rarely pays for me aside from the veryy occasional dinner or concert ticket and i'm fine with that..we're both poor college students!
i always end up paying his cover at parties, though, because he never has cash, which annoys me sometimes haha</p>
<p>i think it is different with each girl. if you are the type to pay for everything go ahead. i think you will be able to distinguish someone who is only hanging around to get the free meal and someone who is actually interested in you. continue to do what you are used to</p>
<p>You need other people to warn you that?</p>
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You need other people to warn you that?
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<p>No, I created this thread so that I could get an idea of whether or not it is something that is common.</p>
<p>A lot of girls are shallow and expect free things. A lot of guys are dumb and will regularly provide. It's pretty common.</p>
<p>I broke up with a guy largely cause he thought money should be a turn on. He expected his family's big yacht to have a different effect on me than it did. Really nice guy, we're still friends, but it just killed the chemistry.</p>
<p>Traditionally, you should go dutch no matter WHAT the situation.</p>
<p>Even if the person's a weirdo/loser and the date was crap, you should still pay for your half in order to prove that you have some dignity, and that you appreciate the fact that there is no such thing as a free meal. It shows that you're mature and independent, and if the date was horrible, hopefully it'll rub off on them.</p>
<p>well, honestly though, if you ask someone out and you chose the restaurant, you don't really have a right to ask them to go dutch. If they offer, you can accept (I personally wouldn't, but I'm not saying I'm right) but it's not fair to ask someone to pay for something they didn't really have any say in.</p>
<p>If you asked her out, but she suggested the place, then it would be fine to suggest splitting.</p>
<p>There are definitely girls out there like that. But it's pretty obvious who they are and you can avoid them. Personally, I get offended if a guy tries to pay for anything for me if we aren't at least good friends or specifically on a date, and I still refuse to let him pay all of it.</p>
<p>In my opinion, those guys who let that kind of girl do that kind of deserve what they're getting.</p>
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it's not fair to ask someone to pay for something they didn't really have any say in.
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<p>Saying "no" isn't having a say?</p>
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In my opinion, those guys who let that kind of girl do that kind of deserve what they're getting.
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<p>Yeah I agree--caveat emptor.</p>
<p>The old days were much simpler.</p>
<p>Easy, maybe it's because I come from a family with enough money and have enough friends without money that I've seen this type of situation even among friends, and would definitely not want to put a date through it.</p>
<p>"Let's go out to dinner, I know the perfect place" we go, we sit down, we look at the menu, in your opinion, this place is wayy to expensive, you would never have chosen it. Are you going to honestly say "can we go somewhere else, this place is too expensive." I mean you could, but it would be extremely awkward, and I think it's kind of rude to do something like that at that point (maybe I think this because I also know how the other person is thinking). Because YOU asked her out and YOU chose the place, I don't think it's fair to assume she's going to pay her way.</p>
<p>Now I guess that example is a bit extreme becaus not only did you choose the place but you didn't even tell her what it was before you got there. If you're really hoping to go dutch, you need to at least throw out an "is this place ok?" so that if it's too expensive, she can make up a reason why she doesnt want to go there.</p>
<p>No matter how little you can afford to pay for the date, there is always the chance your date could afford it less. For me, I've always seen this as a potentially awkward situation that I'd rather avoid, which is why I simply only suggest/choose restaurants with prices I know I can treat her to or less.</p>
<p>I believe "gold digging" insinuates that the other party has some sort of financial stability...which is rarely the case, especially in college.</p>
<p>my boyfriend always tries to pay for things, but i insist on paying for around half of our dates. just seems fair. i ddin't mind when we were just dating, but now that we're in a relationship, it's only fair that we take turns paying since we spend so much time together going out</p>
<p>Easy, I think you need to teach the OP a thing or two about the term "AFC status" and how to avoid it haha.</p>
<p>In the old days, I had a job that paid about four times the cost of tuition at BC so I'd just pay for the dates - I think that was kind of assumed back then.</p>
<p>I think the person asking should expect to pay, but the person being asked should also expect to pay their own way. There are just way too many different rules/expectations. Personally, though, I think I'd rather go dutch on a first date just because I'd feel too awkward having him pay my share.</p>
<p>The dynamics do change when you're in a relationship, but the main idea is still to keep things pretty even.</p>
<p>wow..deja vu..do we have nothing better to talk about than who should pay for a date? hahah</p>
<p>Ugh I hate worrying about this on first dates with people. Like at the end of the semester I literally had NO money and this guy took me to a really nice restaurant. I never would have gone there on my own. I wasn't sure if he would pay or not. So I just had a $20 salad and then he thought I was anorexic.</p>
<p>BUT I wouldn't say letting your date pay for dinner is gold digging. Colleges don't have the best sugar daddy/mama market.</p>