<p>irap3pillows,</p>
<p>I don't know what your parents did to you to make you so hateful, but why don't you just walk away and make your own way in life. If you dislike them to deeply be a man and tell them and leave them with their money......Say it to their face!</p>
<p>It doesn't MATTER what college you go unless its a community college or a bad state university. The whole point of college is to NURTURE your interests and find what "lights the fire within you." For example, Harvard sucks at engineering. Georgia tech kills Harvard in engineering. People are so hung about the name(especially asians) that they don't really think about life. Under many circumstances, nobody cares if you went to harvard or any other school(unless you pursue a career in politics or law). The truth is that F= ma no matter what institution you go to. In my humble opinion, many people who go these fancy smancy schools elite schools don't understand how the real world works.</p>
<p>no, at gmu, F = vt</p>
<p>Lord... you are right in most cases but a Harvard degree DOES matter somewhat, believe it or not. Saying "under many circumstances, nobody cares if you went to harvard or any other school" is false.</p>
<p>Econ at Harvard will open MANY more doors than going to a decent place like George Washington U.</p>
<p>not undergrad..only graduate school</p>
<p>Arti, I have not read this entire thread but I have read your post. I'm a Korean-American with a similar dilemma. My parents, both being Korean, push me and push me to the edge. Often times it gets to the point that even though I know they are just trying to motivate me, I still consider methods of escape... such as suicide. In fact, right after school today I got in another argument with my father and ironically enough, I stumbled upon this thread. His tone of voice is naturally offensive, loud, and often times threatening. When I read your post, however, I realized that I was not the only one in this position. Just like your's, my father also has the attitude "Ivy League or Community College." Our family is above middle class yet he refuses to buy me a car even after "promising" an Audi of my choice if I reached atleast 2100 on my SATs (which I did/surpassed.) On top of all this, I have an older sister who attends the University of Washington, drives a car (2003 beetle,) and did not score as high as me on the SATs. Sometimes it's so difficult for me to understand why he does the things he does and, although it may sound odd, just looking at his face makes me want to drown myself in the lake we have in our backyard. Other times, though, I "sorta" understand where he's going and why. Most likely I have never met or will meet your parents, but I think our fathers both have similar mindsets. They think we can achieve (whether we realistically can or can not) and they want to give it all they got for us to "have a better future." Although many others have posted here that attending an ideal college such as Harvard is not necessarily a guaranteed success, I have noticed that many Asian parents/people automatically think so regardless of validity. I love my entire family dearly, but it's days like these when I think I cannot take anymore. I can't talk to my sister because she only tells me "oh it's because they love you," I can't talk to my mother because she says the same, and I can't talk to my father, which should be self explanatory. Arti, I hope you get a chance to read this and I guess that we should both, along with anybody else with this dilemma, should keep our heads up and try to understand rather than be understood. My parents never had the "opportunity" that you and I share and it's possible that your parents never had either.</p>
<p>Harvard doesn't guarentee success. Ivy league doesn't guarentee success. More people get recruited to banking out of NYU Stern than out of Brown/Dartmouth, yet Brown/Dartmouth is an ivy (talking about undergrad). Tell your parents that and tell them to get over it.</p>
<p>BTW, I love my parents. I used to have that problem until recently (refer to previous posts), they caved in like a week ago and actually don't mind if I go to NYU Stern instead of a more prestigious college. And it just so HAPPENS that NYU Stern is my first choice :)</p>
<p>Not really... Im not a HYP person myself. If I got Harvard, Id choose Stanford, Rice, Tufts and the rest of my list over it</p>
<p>Me neither. If I was in the position to go to Harvard, I'd go to UPENN:Wharton. MIT had undergrad business that's just as good, but it's MIT. I don't like science nerds. And most of all, I HATE science.</p>
<p>Oh, that feels good. I think I'm the only asian person at my school who hates science.</p>
<p>haha good luck klee...</p>
<p>i kinda feel bad for asian parents. seriously, i was such a good kid but their pushing kind of drove me to the edge. im now the asian parent's nightmare: straight As, 2300+ SAT, non-math/science, and recreational drug user. i think if my parents had been a little more easygoing i would've turned out better. ironic.</p>
<p>To jimbob1225: lol!</p>
<p>Haha, both parents used to be like Harvard/Yale/Princeton and UC's (Berkeley, LA, Davis), NOW! But my dad's better now...though I'd say he looks too much into rankings. My mom still acts the same way and doesn't want me going out of Cali, while I want to get out ASAP, because of brand names. She for one didn't even want me applying OOS, haha. Too bad the tuition flies up 95234% if I go OOS, which has a big chance of happening since I've only been accepted OOS so far. If I get in Berk or LA, I'll probably go though. I'm not going to have my parents pay like 60k more over 4 years just for one reason.</p>
<p>Bay Area = awesome place Neo Yoyo. And the rest of Cali is awesome too. You can't beat NorCal though...</p>
<p>Anyway, good luck with Berk or UCLA--both are awesome schools though all I hear is negatives about Berk from students, weird. Have fun wherever ya go. As a 14-year Cali resident, I didn't want to go OOS at all, but then we moved to the other side of the country and now I'm seriously liking up North. UPenn is lookin' good for this social stoner...</p>
<p>I think what you fundamentally have to understand is that Asian parents, by large, look for security for their children. For example, look at the traditional list of vocations that Asian parents tend to be supportive of (in no particular order): Engineering, Medicine or Teaching. Part of this is driven by their own experiences, assuming that they are immigrants, and part of this is also the fact that these vocations tend to be the most secure, especially medicine.</p>
<p>Similarly, there is a tendency to believe that schools such as Harvard and Yale will ensure a successful career, which it doesn't, but it does serve as a reasonable sign post. On average, somebody at Harvard is more likely to be "financially secure" than somebody who goes to a state university (ignoring debt).</p>
<p>Hence, there is a general distaste of the humanities and liberal arts as being majors as well as careers for Asian parents, given their relative insecurity, since they are broad, and it's difficult to gauge demand in any one of those, although you may be very successful nevertheless.</p>
<p>This is coming from somebody from an Asian family himself. I think it ultimately depends on how you family is like, but it is fair to say that most Asian families lean towards what I described above.</p>
<p>From an Indian perspective, what most South Asian parents I know want for their kids is to get a fancy degree in a stable field (doctor or engineer for us) and then pursue whatever the hell we want (like art or music) but have this degree as a safety throughout life.</p>
<p>You might be Chinese if:
1. Your mother has a shorthaired curly perm that may be dyed.
2. Your dad is some sort of engineer.
3. Your parents still tried to get you into places half-price saying you were 12 when you were really 13+.
4. You ask your parents help on one math problem and 2 hours later they're still lecturing you.
5. You have a 40 lb. bag of rice in your pantry.
6. Everyone thinks you're "Chinese" no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from.
7. You've had a bowl haircut at one point in your life.
8. Your parents enjoy comparing you to other kids.
9. You've had to sit through karaoke videos with scantily clad, ugly Asian women attempting to dance and walk around a temple, forest, or library.
10. Your parents say, "Don't forget your heritage."
11. You or your parents drive mostly Japanese cars.
12. You've learned to keep bargaining even if the prices are already rock bottom.
13. You've had to eat parts of animals they don't even put in hot dogs.
14. At least once, you've started a joke with "Confucius say...."
15. You know what bok choy is.
16. You've gotten little red envelopes with money inside around February.
17. Piles of shoes tend to make it hard to open the front, back, and closet doors.
18. You hear your name + eee (optional) + ah! every time someone calls you. For example: Joy + eee + ah
19. You have no eyelashes and / or no perceptible eyelids.
20. Idiot people try to impress you with pathetic imitation Asian languages, like the ever- so-popular: ching chong woo bok chi, etc.
21. Your parents say leaving rice in your bowl is a sin.
22. The Bio lectures on marine life (seaweed, sea cucumbers, and octopi) were last night's dinner.
23. Your ancestors 1000 generations back invented the back scratcher.
24. Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 12 midnight to say, "In China (or other native country), we studied even more."
25. Your parents expect you'll be best friends with any one off the street in any given area as long as they are Asian.
26. An Asian woman comes on campus and people ask: "Is that your mother?" Well then, "Is it your sister?"
27. Your relatives' houses smell like incense, mothballs, or both.
28. Your parents say, "Calculus? I took Calculus in 8th grade!"
29. Everyone thinks you're good at math.
30. Your parents' vocabulary is filled with "ai-yahs and Wah's."
31. You like $1.75 movies.
32. You like $1.50 movies even more.
33. Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Asia with fuzzy bunnies, vinyl ducks, and English words that make no sense, in great colors like yellow, pink, magenta, orange, and the ever more popular lime green.
34. Your parents insist you marry within your race.
35. You never order chop suey, sweet and sour pork, or any other imitation of oriental food.
36. You either really, really want to go to UC Berkeley or really want to stay away from it.
37. Your parents have never kissed you.
38. Your parents have never kissed each other.
39. You learned about the birds and the bees from someone other than your parents.
40. "You want a stereo?!!! When I was your age, I didn't even have shoes!!"
41. People see a bunch of scribbles on a chopstick and ask you to translate.
42. You have to call just about all your parents friends Auntie or Uncle.
43. You have 12+ aunts and uncles.
44. At expensive restaurants, or any restaurant for that matter, you order a delicious glass of water for your beverage and NEVER order dessert.
45. Your parents simply cut the green/black part off the bread and say, "Eat anyway. It's still good."
46. The vast majority of the people related to you wear glasses.
47. You will most likely be taller than your parents.
48. Your parents have either made you play the piano, the violin, or both.
49. You get nothing if you do well in school, but crapped on if you don't.
50. When going to other people's houses, you always have to bring a gift.
51. The male members of your family still pull their socks up to their knees.
52. Your family owns a tennis racquet, golf clubs, or both.
53. Your family always cheers for the Asian athlete on TV.
54. The furniture in your house never matches the wallpaper, the carpet, the decorations, or any of the rest of the furniture.
55. You have rocks, sticks, leaves, and strange-smelling, unknown substances in your pantry for use as medicine.
56. You own a rice cooker or two.
57. You buy soy sauce by the gallon.
58. Your family owns butcher knives bigger than your head.
59. Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrible the weather was in their native country, and how much they still appreciated going.
60. Your parents buy your clothes and shoes many sizes too big so you can "grow into it" and wear it for years to come.
61. Your parents believe in feng shui.
62. Your parents are very conservative and think that tank tops/halters/spaghetti straps show too much skin.
63. Every time your parents lecture you, they always make up excuses that relate to everything you've done in the past.
64. You eat rice everyday.
65. When you were little, your parents beat you with sticks and other stuff.
66. The adults fight for the bill when you go out to dinner.
67. When you get a grade of 98 on a report card, your parents ask you, What happened to the other two points?
68. Your parents like to watch Asian language movies with English subtitles.
69. You or your closest friends drive supped up Acura Integras, Toyota Celicas, or similar sports cars, with oversized spoilers, large decals all over, and Asian calligraphic stickers on the back window.
70. You and your friends hang out at places that serve tapioca milk tea.
71. When you were little and your stomach was upset, your mother rolled a handkerchief filled with a hardboiled egg enveloping a silver coin over your stomach. If the coin turned dark, your mother said you had hot wind which surely could be treated by the following in #72 below
72. Your mom thinks herbal teas and tiger balm are cure alls for whatever ails you.
73. Your parents favorite grocery store is in Chinatown (or insert native ethnic group)
74. You have newspapers in your home that have very little English in them.
75. Your parents pronounce their rs like ls. Example: Chevlolet instead of Chevrolet
76. You dont have a nose bridge.
77. You have a major Class 3 under bite, which your parents say is O.K. as long as you can still gnaw the meat off a drumstick. Forget you have the jaw line of a chimpanzee.
78. Your mother wears knee-hi hose with the rolled top showing at the calf.<br>
79. The male members of your family still wear while socks with black dress shoes.
80. Your favorite restaurant meal, by far, is dim sum.
81. You dont mind eating braised chicken feet. In fact, you kind of like it
yum.
82. In your family a dog is a delicacy, not a pet.</p>
<p>Me=The typical asian parents' worst nightmare</p>
<p>SAT: ~2200
GPA: ~3.6
Worst Class: Physics, Math (hate teacher)
Best Class: APUSH, English
Intended major: Finance/International Business
Intended career: Investment Banking
Least favorite classes: Science, Math (because of the teacher)
Favorite classes: English, History
Dream School: UPENN-Wharton (notice it's not HYP, or MIT, and it's a BUSINESS school)
Probably will end up: NYU-Stern (notice it's not HYP,and it's a BUSINESS school)
Highest degree I plan to pursue: MBA (notice it's NOT in medicine, engineering, or other science)</p>
<p>Ewww.....Science....I HATE SCIENCE WITH EVERY FIBER IN MY BODY. So an MD or an engineering degree AS A SAFETY...NOT AN OPTION.</p>
<p>forget ivy, go to Rice</p>
<p>Forget Rice, go to Wharton.
Wait...Wharton is an ivy. Oops.</p>
<p>HYPSM..... what does that mean??????????...HYSPM-------harvard, yale, stanford, U Penn, MIT??????????????.... an hypothesis</p>
<p>the P stands for Princeton. correct me if i'm wrong.</p>
<p>Post 217...You forgot some.</p>
<ol>
<li>When your parents tell you Syracuse is a Third tier school and can keep a straight face.</li>
<li>When your parents group HYP in a tier and everyone else in another.</li>
<li>When you make a joke about students at Brown (you said "Brown students"), my parents think you're referring to African American students</li>
<li>You get crapped on if you get into HYP, disowned if you don't.</li>
</ol>
<p>Chancellor_Phoenix: Sounds about right for a majority of Asian families, though I'd have to say my parents are slightly different. While they do think in terms of security and that the more well-known colleges will ensure success, they're actually pushing me towards liberal arts (economics), which I'd have to say is probably in the minority.</p>