Grade my APUSH essay?

<p>Please grade my essay i want to see what i think i got :) Thanks!</p>

<p><a href="http://apcentral.collegeboard.com/apc/public/repository/ap11_frq_us_history.pdf%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://apcentral.collegeboard.com/apc/public/repository/ap11_frq_us_history.pdf&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>The political parties formed after the ratification of the constitution at George Washington's detest, contributed none to the development of national unity; in fact there was a lack of unity during the period of 1790-1840. The political parties originally formed were the Federalists and Democratic-Republicans. Their ideals for how government should be run were highly different and this led to no unification. The Federalists under John Adam's presidency would begin sectionalism in which politics would support their region rather than as a whole country; this hurting national unity. During the French Revolution the political parties in the US were divided whether to support or oppose the revolution. The federalists under Hamilton (more likely to support Great Britian) and the Demo-Reps (more likely to support France). On the brink of the war of 1812, the country would be divided between the south and west war supporting republicans the war hawks, and the Federalists who lost power when the US won the war. </p>

<p>The Election of Andrew Jackson and the division of the Whigs who opposed his polices would hurt national unity even under the Jacksonian era of "the common man" and, increased political participation. Also in 1828 the deemed "tariff of abomination" clearly showed that the division of political parties led to the division of America, in terms of national unity because the political parties had different sectional interests and not national interests. </p>

<p>The political parties hurt the development of national unity in the period of 1790-1840. The political parties divided the country into northern ideals and southern Jefferson based ideals. Because of the political parties there was no development in US national unity between 1790-1840.</p>

<p>Are you answering the political party question from 2011?</p>

<p>If you are your answer is good but try to make a seperate short intro to answer the question. Your long 1st paragraph is a bit confusing.</p>

<p>You seem prepared :slight_smile: but isn’t the AP in may.? God you are a true overachieving CCer :wink: </p>

<p>Good,luck</p>

<p>Sent from my Desire HD using CC App</p>

<p>bumpbumpy.</p>

<p>You need an intro and have your thesis in the intro</p>

<p>intro is suppose to give some background info on time or date</p>

<p>Essay should be longer, should be formatted into 1 intro, 2-3 bodies, 1 conclusion</p>

<p>bodies should be given a topic sentence and focus on one specific idea</p>

<p>Democratic Republican should be shortened to Republicans, and not Demo-reps</p>

<p>You also need a lot more information</p>