Grade my Essay?

Test Preparation
1

<p>I'm an international student from Europe, and I'm willing to take the SAT soon. My English teacher usually corrects my essays, but she doesn't really have experience in the organisation of an SAT essay. Here it goes:</p>

<p>Some people believe there is only one foolproof plan, perfect solution, or correct interpretation. But nothing is ever that simple. For better or worse, for every so-called final answer there is another way of seeing things. There is always a “however”.</p>

<p>Assignment: Is there always another explanation or another point of view? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on the issue.</p>

<p>Essay:</p>

<p>When we solve a problem,or plan or interpret something, we come up with ideas expressed from our point of view. However, it is very difficult to establish whether our solution is unique;in other words, there’s a “however”. I believe it is possible for people to come up with different points of view for several reasons.</p>

<p>Firstly, each person may have different trains of thought when dealing with an issue, whether it requires a subjective or objective solution. For instance, For instance, many literature texts are interpreted and reviewed by critics, although it is possible that many reviews can slightly alter the meaning the author had originally conveyed, or differ from each other in detail. Other examples can be found in anthropology. For example, a study suggested that a tribe from Central Siberia had many similarities with one in Southwestern United States,such as language and dialect. Some researchers believe that there had been a migration from Siberia into American territory, while others point out that this movement took place the other way around.</p>

<p>Secondly, coming up with a foolproof plan or a perfect solution requires a great deal of knowledge, thus one is likely to face a “however”. For example, I once handed in a math assignment, and the next day the teacher arrested my attention on the last problem. The teacher appreciated my solution, “however” he stated that the task could have been solved with a much shorter solution, which used concepts I hadn’t read about before. Regarding such matters which changed history, one striking example is Einstein’s theory of relativity. After Newton established the laws of classical mechanics, for many centuries and decades the scientific community believed that time is absolute.In other words, this idea conveyed that time was flowing at the same pace anywhere in the Universe. However, in 1905, Einstein proved this concept to be false. He argued instead that time is relative, thus building the foundation of the theory of relativity. This was a breathrough in the scientific field, consequently, the entire notion of time was put under a big question mark.</p>

<p>In conclusion, I believe it is impossible to label something as interpreted or planned in a unique way. Whether a task can be solved in an alternative way, it is not necessary that the original one is wrong.</p>

2

<p>Bump. Anybody? </p>

3

<p>Bump 10char</p>

4

<p>Your intro is good, but the conclusion is lacking. It is bad form to use "Firstly, “Secondly”, and “In conclusion”. Your body paragraphs are quite general and don’t focus on one example or argument, but rather used several examples that were not explored in depth. You should choose one strong example per body paragraph and explore how it applies to your argument. </p>

<p>Otherwise, your writing is pretty good, though there are some casual idioms and the expressions “for instance” and “for example” are a bit overused.</p>

<p>8</p>

5

<p>Thanks a lot ! :slight_smile: I’m used to the writing format of the Cambridge examinations, hence I usually write “Firstly” and “Secondly” in the paragraphs of the body; I’ll practice other essay assignments and try to focus more on one example in each body paragraph.</p>

<p>Anyway, thanks again for the feedback!</p>

6

<p>I have another essay; instead of starting a new thread I’ll just post it here.</p>

<p>Technology promises to make our lives easier, freeing up time for leisure pursuits. But the rapid pace of technological evolution and the split second processing capabilities of computers that can work virtually nonstop have made all of us feel rushed. We have adopted the relentless pace of the very machines that were supposed to simplify our lives, with the result that, whether at work or play, people do not feel like their lives have changed for better.</p>

<p>Adapted from Karen Finucan , “Life in the Fast Lane”</p>

<p>Assignment: Do changes that make our lives easier not neccessarly make them better? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue.</p>

<p>While technology has certainly made our lives easier, it is a questionable matter whether it has made them better. For centuries people strived to create tools and gadgets which they could use for their benefit, ranging from agricultural tools to electronic devices. However, it is almost certain that the consequences of many advancements on the modern society outweigh its benefits.</p>

<p>Consider, if you will, the Internet. Undoubtedly, it is one of the most powerful inventions that humankind created. It is possible to acces information from all over the globe in a matter of seconds, thus you virtually have all information you need at your fingertips. We can learn at a faster pace, communicate with people across the world, and practice a broad range of online activies, from searching the weather forecast to buying a car. However, in spite of all the benefits that the Internet brings, consequences may be deleterious for most users. Due to the wide variety of activites that are offered, many people, especially the young generations, choose to spend their time surfing on the Internet. Consequently, they refrain from activites which improve their health and social skills.</p>

<p>Another striking example is the use of communication devices. In recent years, companies produced phones that can carry a considerable amount of tasks, in some cases even better that computers. While these “smartphones” have enriched our social lives, as this technology makes it possible for us to socialize more than ever, they also bring many disadvantages. Probably the most striking one is the erosion of privacy. We can have access to the digital world anytime during the day, as a result the line between the one’s life at home and one’s work life becomes blurred. While a smartphone or a tablet allows me to access the Internet and communicate with somebody from anywhere at anytime, it prevents me from fully concentrating and performing the task I set out to do.</p>

<p>To sum up, many advancements in technology have made our lives easier, but it did not make them better. Due to this ease, man is likely to be less productive and less devoted to work, ultimately leading himself to self-destruction.</p>