<p>Topic: Is progress possible without sacrifice?</p>
<p>Prosperity takes sacrifice. One can never achieve a goal without first sacrificing something. Two of John Steinbeck's great novels exemplify this unique phenomenon. History has also proved this to be true. Rosa Parks, a social rights activist, had to sacrifice her well-being for a utilitarian goal.</p>
<p>In John Steinbeck's The Grapes of Wrath, the Joads family starts off going through the Great Depression. They hope to better their life by leaving their house and moving to California. This leave shows that it takes sacrifice to progress. Later in the novel, the whole country, including California is in a penury. Rosa-Sharon, a pregnant lady who's husband has left, is faced with the ambivalent task of giving breast milk to a poor starving man. She sacrifices her reputation to save the man from death.</p>
<p>Rosa Parks,a key social rights leader, was forced to sacrifice her well-being by refusing to move where she was sitting on a segregated bus. Her sacrifice played a crucial role in getting slavery abolished. Her sacrifice lead to the understanding that all women and men are created equal.</p>
<p>Another novel written by John Steinbeck, Of Mice and Men, shows that one may have to give the ultimate sacrifice to make progress. In this specific book, this is exemplified when George kills Lenny, his dear friend who is on the run because he accidentally kills a woman. Lenny is mentally challenged and George knew that Lenny has to be killed so that he avoids a hard life in torture and eventually death by the woman's husband.</p>
<p>The Grapes of Wrath, Rosa Park's refusal to change her seat, and George's sacrifice of Lenny are just three sacrifices that were done for the greater good of society as a whole. In Of Mice and Men, Lenny is sacrificed to save him the imminent torture that was bound to happen. Literature and history have proved that sacrificing leads to progress. When sacrificing, one must ruminate on the overall benefit, and not what one is giving up at the time. Society greatly benefits from such sacrifices.</p>
<p>You didn't really say what Rosa Parks's sacrifice was exactly. "Her well-being" isn't really concrete. </p>
<p>I think the general idea is good, but I think you could have really explained Rose of Sharon's sacrifice better. She's not at all embarrassed to breast feed the starving man and I don't think she would have been. However, in the beginning of the novel, Rose of Sharon was fairly selfish, and so breast feeding a starving man is overcoming herself in a sense. In fact, she's so poor, she's willing to sacrifice what little she has left for the good of others. It's more than just overcoming embarrassment and to say that would to belittle her character. </p>
<p>I generally think that the ideas are there- you just need to articulate them a little bit better and think a little more deeply if you want those 6's.</p>
<p>"In John Steinbeck's The Grapes of Wrath, the Joads family starts off going through the Great Depression. They hope to better their life by leaving their house and moving to California. This leave shows that it takes sacrifice to progress. Later in the novel, the whole country, including California is in a penury. Rosa-Sharon, a pregnant lady who's husband has left, is faced with the ambivalent task of giving breast milk to a poor starving man. She sacrifices her reputation to save the man from death." This paragraph needs work. What were the sacrifices? What did they have to do with progress? Why were the sacrifices necessary? What would have happened without sacrifices? How do you know? So what if California ends up "in a penury"? What does that have to do with sacrifice? Then you end by talking about Rosa-Sharon, which has little to do with your thesis. You should have focused on one or two major incidents in the novel and then discuss them in detail by explaining what the sacrifices were, what the effects of the sacrifices were, and what would have happened if there weren't those sacrifices (how do you know this?).</p>
<p>Rosa Parks,a key social rights leader, was forced to sacrifice her well-being by refusing to move where she was sitting on a segregated bus. Her sacrifice played a crucial role in getting slavery abolished. Her sacrifice lead to the understanding that all women and men are created equal.</p>
<p>She was forced to sacrifice her well-being? Her sacrifice played a crucial role in getting slavery abolished? Her sacrifice led to the understanding that all women and men are created equal? I don't think so. I think it's time you look at a history book.</p>
<p>Again, you need to go into more detail about the things that I mentioned about the first body paragraph.</p>
<p>Also, does it make sense to talk about a Steinbeck book in one paragraph, then skip to Rosa Parks, then go back to Steinbeck? Doesn't make much sense to me.</p>
<p>Thanks for the comments, I changed up one paragraph (just for practice) and I'd appreciate if you can comment on it also:</p>
<p>I changed this:</p>
<p>Rosa Parks,a key social rights leader, was forced to sacrifice her well-being by refusing to move where she was sitting on a segregated bus. Her sacrifice played a crucial role in getting slavery abolished. Her sacrifice lead to the understanding that all women and men are created equal.</p>
<p>To:</p>
<p>History has also shown that progress requires sacrifice. Rosa Parks was a key civil rights leader and secretary to the President of the NAACP. On December 1, 1955 she was arrested for disobeying a bus driver when she was told to move to the back of the bus to make room for white people. Her refusal acted as a catalyst for the successful Montgomery bus boycott. The African Americans in Montgomery did not use any form of public transportation for 381 days, sacrificing their privilege to accomplish the goal of desegregation. They knew that in order to get what they wanted, they had to give something up. Rosa Park's act of civil disobedience supplemented by the Montgomery Bus Boycott, eventually led to the signing of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 which banned segregation in schools and public places.</p>
<p>Pretty good essay. Your revision of the Rosa Park's paragraph is good, but I would try not to use so many facts like boycotting for 381 days. Also, write your paragraphs in order of when you stated them in your introduction (i.e. The Grapes of Wrath, Of Mice and Men, Rosa Parks). Finally, I would try to use different authors.</p>
<p>Okay, it sounds like you just copied this straight out of the encyclopedia. Anyway, I still don't like it that much. It's better, but an essay is supposed to be an argument, not a history lesson. You need to direct your facts to your thesis. Show how all those facts you gave support the thesis. A few days ago I wrote something about this. You should read other essay posts before you go on.</p>