Grade my SAT essay please

<p>I'm not a native speaker but I try to be natural in language use. </p>

<p>Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and the assignment below.
We would like to think that progress causes problems to be solved completely, and sometimes that happens. For example, some diseases that once posed a serious threat are no longer a problem, thanks to modern medicine. Some problems can be solved, and they go away. But as often as not, problems exist in a chain of cause and effect: for each problem solved, a new one develops.
Assignment: Does progress reduce the number of problems in the world, or does solving old problems just lead to new ones?</p>

<p>The past decades have seen rapid development in science and technology. With the advent of new facilities and equipment such as the Internet and automobiles television, many people are optimistic that all of us will live in a utopian world in the near future. However, I believe that progress creates new issues that are hard to solve. The cases of Internet and cars will show this.
It is above doubt that the Internet has simplified people’s lives to a large extent. People can send an email instead of writing a letter; people can watch a movie online instead of being crammed in the movie theater; people can shop on Amazon instead of walking to the downtown. Lots of problems are solved by the Internet. However, we should also be aware that at the same time, it creates new problems. One of the problems is the false information. Internet enables all people to post whatever they like, without prior censorship. As a result, some people who want to use the Internet to make profits or achieve something else may intentionally post fabricated things on the Internet. The false information will mislead innocent and vulnerable Internet users into trap, causing either financial loss or misguided emotions. No doubt, the Internet has solved many problems that were impossible to figure out in the past. But at the same time, new ones, such as fabricated information, emerge.
With the improvement of living standard, cars have been affordable to more and more people. Indeed, automobiles have solved several problems such as communication problem and travelling problem. As the country on the wheel, the US has had a developed road system. Nevertheless, there are many problems. First, even though cities are expanding and people are moving outward, the downtown areas of many big cities are very crowded. In some extreme cases, it is even faster to ride a bike or walk than to be locked in the traffic. In addition, the pollution due to petroleum burning is more and more evident. Although some hydrogen fuels have been proposed, none of them are as efficient and cheap as petro. Therefore, we have to endure polluted airs for some time. Therefore, although the cars have improved people’s lives by accelerating the life pace and expanding circle of travel, many issues have more or less counteract the advantage. Moreover, these issues are hard to solve: traffic jam requires a new city planning solution and technology to reduce pollution is immature. Hence, cars have brought new challenges to the society.
The side effect of progress is evident not only in the Internet and automobiles, but also in every technological advance. Thus, we cannot deny the new problems that accompany the progress.</p>

<p>The majority of your problems are due to the fact that you are not a native English speaker. That said, the errors you make are relatively minor. There are enough of them to lower your score a bit, but the essay is still a strong one. The strength lies in the fact that you have significant ideas developed by facts, reasons and examples. In short, your content is good and the presentation is generally competent.</p>

<p>Your second paragraph is not as strong as the first. Some of your points are not as clear as they need to be. (What is the ‘communication problem’? What is the ‘traveling problem’? Why did you mention the roads?) Once you got started, the paragraph improved, but I suspect you were more comfortable and confident writing about the internet than you were about cars.</p>

<p>I think this essay would score a 10.</p>

<p>You have some good ideas but should work on articles, plurals and idioms.</p>

<p>Articles: downtown, not “the” downtown
society, not “the” society
progress, not “the” progress
“a” trap, not trap
false information, not “the” false information</p>

<p>Plurals: “living standard” and “problem” should be plural
“airs” should not have an “s”</p>

<p>Idioms: “the country on the wheel”–I’m not sure what you mean
“expanding circle of travel”–I know what you mean, but it is not a phrase I’ve ever heard</p>

<p>Despite my criticisms, you have good ideas and lots of potential. I could not write an essay nearly as good as this in any language I’ve studied!</p>