Grade this ACT essay! I love hobos!

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
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<p>This is my first practice essay. I have no idea if it is okay. Please help out.</p>

<p>Some specific questions: I didn't really have any "specific" details.... is that okay? I also used "we" a lot to address the reader. Is that okay?</p>

<p>PROMPT: Many high school libraries use some of their limited funding to subscribe to popular magazines with articles that are interesting to students. Despite limited funding, some educators support this practice because they think having these magazines encourages students to read. In your opinion, should high school libraries subscribe to popular magazines? </p>

<p>My Essay:</p>

<p>Whether it be classic literature, comics, or popular magazines, reading will always hold vast benefits. At home, students are not very motivated to read due to more "fun" activities being available, such as video games, social interaction, or sports. There is only one other place where students stay for a significant amount of time out side the home: school. Thus, school should be the designated place for students to read, even if it costs the school to spend its limited funding on subscribing to magazines. This spending is worth it as it enhances imagination, which allows students to live healthily in their life full of rules and restrictions</p>

<p>The imagination is a magical thing. From when children are just infants, they imagine fantastic schemes of heroic deeds, romantic relationships, and ideal circumstances. Indeed, this unchecked imagination that we all harbor is perhaps what sets us apart from animals. Reading fosters and embraces our imagination. Many of our imaginitive schemes have their origin in books. When we take many book-originated ideas and combine them to create an original idea-that too is our imagination at work. Thus, is vital to feeding our amazing imagination. [Side note: Damn it! I didn't put reading in the last sentence. "reading is vital to.."]</p>

<p>A healthy imagination is vital for a good reason. Kids are constantly restricted, and imagination sets them free. When a student wakes up, he or she is forced to eat breakfast, get dressed, and go to school. At school, the student is forced to abide by teachers' rules and work. At the home, the student is bound by the parents' restrictions, which may range from doing chores to sleeping before 10. The one time the student is free is when his imagination is set free when he or she reads a popular magazine article. Because it is interesting, the student will process the information and think about it. He or she may ponder about future technology if the article is on a new video game, or imagine new football strategies if the article is about football. All of this is necessary - a student must use his imagination, elicited from reading magazine articles, in order to survive another day of confinement and restrictions. </p>

<p>In the end, reading magazine articles proves to be vital for two reasons. One is that it helps us build a healthy imagination. The other is that this imagination is vital for children to live their lives, which are full of rules and restrictions. These benefits are well worth a portion of schools' limited spending</p>

<p>2.3 pages. Grade out of 12? Please tell me what I should do to get an 11/12 on the ACT essay!!</p>

<p>[I posted this on the SAT forum as well since the ACT is super inactive. The act essay comes pretty close in the grading so you can grade it to SAT standards.]</p>

<p>[the title "i love hobos" has no relevance to this thread and was used to catch your attention]</p>

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<p>Sorry, but this essay isn’t good. It’s completely off topic. You are writing with the assumption that magazines help imagination. Okay… no specifics AT ALL. You don’t have an example of magazine, a moment when a magazine inspired you or someone else. It’s just generic crap which offers close to zero substance. The second paragraph is where it goes way off track. In that paragraph, it seems like you are trying to respond to the prompt: Is imagination necessary for one to be successful? Your arguments are very weak and lack solid substance. I would center my argument more around these: School supplied magazines are convenient for children rather than them subscribing. Where kids may not read books, they can find a whole host of interesting articles. They can be a powerful learning resources. This is my honest opinion. </p>

<p>You should use concrete examples supported by experiences or data of some sort and the writing should directly rather than indirectly respond to the prompt. I don’t know scoring but I would give an 8-9</p>

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<p>Wrote this without reading the post above:
Use concrete examples. For either paragraph, for example, you could have used a personal example to illustrate a point. Do not use vague generalizations or an exploration of the concept. Use psychological examples that you’ve learned-something more definite. Also, having three less supported examples might be a more useful alternative although two well supported examples is fine. Definitely try to use a personal example or something like a science or news example. I’d give your essay an 8-10 (when I took ACT in 7th grade I said generic things as you did, worse language, and got a 7.)</p>