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<p>Do you honestly believe some of the crap you post?</p>
<p>oh get off my case.
especially if you're just gonna say, ooh look, she posted crap again.
if you don't like it DONT EFFING READ IT!!! :mad:</p>
<p>put him on your ignore list</p>
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oh get off my case.
especially if you're just gonna say, ooh look, she posted crap again.
if you don't like it DONT EFFING READ IT!!! :mad:
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<p>Worriedsenior wrote what I was thinking of posting. I felt that I couldn't add much to it. Besides, your posts make it seem like you live in some sort of sugar coated world.
_____________________________</p>
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<p>Helicopter parents...geez. Really? ***?! Maybe it's because I don't have that type of parents? I don't know. You're suppose to have some sort of career or at least well on your way towards one by the time you graduate, right? I sure hope so. That means that you can probably be able to pay off your loans. Right? </p>
<p>If they stop paying your tuition then you figure out a way. Probably easier said than done. However, you can always stop, get a job, wait to become independent, continue with school. It'll probably suck, sure, but that's life. </p>
<p>I've overheard some kids talking about how their parents check up on them. They log on to their URSA, MyUCLA, Courseweb, EEWeb, etc. and check on their grades. That's some overboard **** right there. </p>
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<p>I agree.</p>
<p>well, most people aren't prepared to completely split off from their parents over one disagreement.
if everyone who had a major fight with their parents went and made themselves independent, we wouldn't be having this discussion. OP would have simply broken off ties and then there would be no issue.
but parents can and do play a major role (and they don't need to be helicopter parents to have an involvement). bottom line is, it's good for parents to be involved. and i'm not saying overinvolved, just involved. which generally means looking out for their kids.
unless parents are being completely unreasonable, then you get the bad along with the good. only alternative is getting nothing at all.</p>
<p>liyana, I completely agree that we should work things out with our parents. It's prob best if you can convince your parents that this girl is worth it to you. I'm saying that OP lives away from home and his parents can't and shouldn't choose your mate for him. </p>
<p>What I got from your first post was a "ZOMG what the F am I am going to do if my parents cut me off and make me go home on the weekends." That I do not agree with. People should grow up and become more independent of their parents. I'm sure the parents would like to know that their kids can live on their own, I mean they'll have to someday.</p>
<p>*** is this? Has mme gone soft on us?</p>
<p>eh, emm's just disapparated again. she goes through phases.</p>
<p>i wasn't saying that parents would take drastic actions, i'm just saying, parents can. just cuz someone is in college doesn't mean they can totally ignore their parents' wishes. but i do very much agree that there's a balance, and your last sentences sum it up. i would also like to thank you for replying without attacking, unlike some people on this board >.<</p>
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[Quote]
Originally Posted by worriedsenior
I'm financially independent. But is it that hard to stay in school if your parents refuse to pay your tuition? Loans, fin aid, claim independence in taxes/fafsa. Though you may not live extravagantly, getting by should not be a problem.
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<p>paying 40k a year is kinda difficult for some students...</p>
<p>Agree with MadeInChina. 40K a year would be possibly take 10 years to save up a return the loan.</p>
<p>I don't know .. take your choice. If your parents don't like your gf now, I'm sure there will be inconvenient troubles in the future (if you continued to stay together). Better to end it here than later.</p>
<p>loyalty to your peers.</p>
<p>love for your elders (love doesn't mean you always have to listen to them)</p>
<p>wow this is ridiculous, maybe its because i have the best parents ever.... people need to learn to be independent and make their own decisions otherwise youre never going to learn. parents need to lay off a little and let you make some major mistakes, how else are you going to learn anything? and to the parents who are checking ursa and myucla and *<strong><em>, wow! if youre not making the grades here and/or you dont have your *</em></strong> together by now then what are you doing in college?</p>
<p>and i agree wit supery00n, love for your elders and respect for them is completely different than leading your own life and making your own mistakes. i have the utmost love and respect for my parents but i dont necessarily always agree with them; sometimes, going against their decision has proved better for me, and they have definitely realized that. this campus if full of immature people who really arent ready for college.</p>
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Mr. Puppet, what is love? :confused:</p>
<p>Etti, where are you?</p>
<p>yeah, i appreciate the posts...</p>
<p>but for all of you saying that i am immature, too independent, a parent's baby (<strong><em>?)...you don't even know who i am or the depth of my situation...i would like to personally meet all of you who think i'm just a kid, in real life on campus...we can talk and i can guarantee you that i've been through rougher things in life than you have, so don't even give me that </em></strong>***</p>
<p>obviously these negative responses are from the ones who have never been in a serious relationship (and probably won't anytime soon)...so you don't even realize what i am going through at this point, and you can't relate, so that's understandable because i wasn't expecting condolences from anyone...</p>
<p>it's one of the hardest things to end a relationship when you both still love each other...even now we're both really good friends...but we need more room to grow and find ourselves before we find each other...we need a little space...</p>
<p>in terms of finance? that is just retarded...that argument has nothing to do with this whatsoever...please be more knowledgeable about the situation...because love and money don't correlate, and neither do relationships in life...</p>
<p>and for those that believe i didn't fight for my relationship to my parents? don't make me laugh...there were many factors involved in this break-up..and my parents disapproval was one of them because ultimately if your parents do not believe in my relationship right now then my relationship will not last...i understand that there is a certain line that your parents cannot cross...but when it comes to relationships, you better sit down and listen to your parents because they're not ********ting you and they have experiences beyond us...initially i was rebellious of course, but you need to open up your mind and heart on the matter and realize what is best for the relationship...of course it hurts me so much that i had to break her heart...but it would have been worse if the bond was for years...most of the girls sympathize and understand this situation because they have had their heart's broken for various reasons and they know what it's like...of course the guy's haven't because they have never had to break up a relationship from my situation...understand before you judge</p>
<p>time will heal</p>
<p>aww... i hope you find happiness etti! if i were in your situation i would too be heartbroken but, you're right - time will heal. good luck!</p>
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I'm financially independent. But is it that hard to stay in school if your parents refuse to pay your tuition? Loans, fin aid, claim independence in taxes/fafsa. Though you may not live extravagantly, getting by should not be a problem.
[/quote]
Aside from the topic ...</p>
<p>If you want to make that statement, then give your car back to your parents. Never go back home. I think that will hurt you and help you realize what contributions your parents make. You can't treat your parents like they're tools to USE for your wellbeing, and push them away when you feel independent.</p>
<p>I think most parents are conscious about their decision, since they've gone through more experiences and have lived longer than you have. [not all parents .. I'm excluding some who make poor decisions] Listen to what they have to say. It may seem like you're a mama's boy, but in the future, you won't regret it.</p>
<p>Is it worth it to lose some financial (down payment for a house ... )
assistance, other assistance, over love which will be "history" in the future? (no reference to etti, sorry don't get me wrong)</p>
<p>There is a different response for each person ...</p>
<p>Etti is right .. better to end it now than later when you get deeper in a relationship. I think better things will come if you wait.. just wait for the right timing.</p>
<p>All you people saying "you're independent enough to make your own decisions mama's boy" blah blah blah...sheesh get over yourselves. If you think you have gained so much wisdom in 18,19,20 years, how much wiser do you think your parents are, considering they're probably what, more than twice your age? Unless you think your parents are stupid? Read what boelter hall said: "You can't treat your parents like they're tools to USE for your wellbeing, and push them away when you feel independent. I think most parents are conscious about their decision, since they've gone through more experiences and have lived longer than you have." No offense (ok maybe a little), but a lot of you sound like you think you're some old sage from the far east giving million dollar life lessons.</p>
<p>if your parents didn't like her in the first place, i'd say you might have a bit of a problem with choosing the girl. i mean really, unless she's a bad influence, parents won't <em>make</em> you break up with a girl because she's not funny, has no manners, something lame like that. so in that sense, yes, you should break up with her even without your parents urging.</p>
<p>as for you two being in love. depending on how long you're together, as i'm sure you realize, your concept of love grows with every day. 6 months may seem like love, but after 2 years, you realize that was simply puppy love, and that now you love them more than ever. that also might mainly have to do with our young age, but i think 18+ and after a year or so you are allowed to claim that you truly love someone.</p>
<p>now. i'm assuming you're also breaking up due to long-distance college relationship? if not, please ignore my input.
if you are really in love, not what you think is love "now" but a love that can't grow any bigger a year or 2 from now, then i think you should be able to work out the long distance relationship. if you are too afraid to even try to make it work, aside from your parents wishes, then maybe you really aren't in love. i understand you care deeply for her, and i'm not saying it won't develop into love if you continue, but maybe you're just not there yet.
if you ARE really truly, absolutely, in love with her, then i think you should do whatever it takes to be together. the internet is a wonderful thing, if you can talk jsut as much as friends, then what's to stop you from being together?</p>
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<p>Do you really want to know?
<3</p>