<p>I need help. I am currently brainstorming for my essay to UC's. (I know I am a little bit late but I am not that late haha)
Okay so I'm writing my essay and I seriously want people's opinions. I am going to post my essay. It is NOT my final essay by any means. I have to edit it like 300 million times still. It has no structure really, but it has most of the ideas that I want to include in it. Give me any feedback and if you have any corrections or proofreading please don't hesitate to let me know !! :D</p>
<p>Describe the world you come from for example, your family, community or school and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
It is commonly thought that the peers one surrounds themselves with, and the community that he or she is a part of, makes one who he or she is. This cannot be completely true for my situation. My story is a little bit different, but also makes me unique. I grew up in an urban city that did not provide a highly educative system, but as a young child I had already begun to take interest in my studies. My mother was always working to provide for my sister and I, and while she was working my grandmother took care of us. As a first generation child in the family, most of the adults had no true desire to make sure that we were on top of our studies and becoming educated little kids. I apparently did not need that. I began to bother my mother and grandmother and aunt, whoever was around basically, to listen to me recite a stack of books as tall as my shoulder. I would constantly correct my mothers bad English, but this never seemed strange to me. My dreams have been shaped from these little things. I cherish my desire for a better life through education. I have always wanted to be better than the typical person flying by life. I dedicate my motivation to do better to my parents. My family, although not the walking example of success, have showed me that I want something better for myself.
The world I belong to has never been a stable one. Since I have a single mother it was never an easy thing. Even though my mother made barely enough to get us by, she did want something better for her children. She would sacrifice her own down time to pay off for my violin lessons, dance class, recital costumes, instruments, and other expenses that came with those activities. I thank my mother for that because if it was not for her I would have never been able to experience the most memorable experiences of my life. I learned to have passion for everything I did. I knew that I really was not in any position to be in part of these great teams and that is where my drive towards improving myself and applying myself to each extracurricular I did. These activities that I was a part of sparked a lot of ambition and I felt like I could conquer the world. My aspirations have changed as I grow, but the one thing that has not changed is my dedication to everything that I do. After becoming a vegetarian in the summer of 2010 I also realized that I wanted to make a difference in the lives of animals undergoing cruelty. I am very compassionate.</p>