<p>It seems as if I forgot how to enjoy myself when I'm alone. I used to look forward to alone time because I found people suffocating and I was poor at social situations. Now that I have friends, I feel depressed when I'm alone. I know I can just read a book or watch TV, but it can't keep my interest long enough to satisfy me.</p>
<p>I know I could just call people, but I'm not close enough to anyone to do that yet and I have a lack of transportation to go anywhere else anyway. I don't want it to be forced and I'm afraid of boring people because I'm not a good event planner. </p>
<p>How do I get used to being alone? I feel like a loser because I don't have any friends to hang out with on the weekends to do stuff that normal college students do. I've pretty much been in acquaintance mode for months and I wish I had a friend where I can just pick up the phone and call them everyday without it being awkward. I guess I don't have much of a life after all :/</p>
<p>So how do I spend time alone? I feel like I'm giving up on my goals of having a real social life, but I need to get used to being alone for now as change does not happen overnight...</p>
<p>you spend your alone time on the internet ,
that way you’re still talking to people even when you’re by yourself ,
oh and congrats on having friends</p>
<p>The reason you don’t enjoy it is because you seem to think that if you spend any time alone, you’re a loser, so you’re insecure about the action itself. That’s really not good, because it probably means you’re becoming a needy person who HAS to have company in order to not feel like you’re weird. Or maybe it’s because you’re spending so much time alone that you’ve become sick of it. Either way, I guess just try to be more yourself with people and things will fall into place. People will start to call you and include you in plans, and you’ll feel more comfortable calling them and doing the same. If you’re afraid of boring anyone or forcing things, that means that up until now you probably haven’t been acting like yourself. Just relax, because when people relax that’s when they’re able to start making jokes and start being able to think on their feet and come up with natural responses to what people say; when you sit there and try to come up with a “witty” or “interesting” response to things that people say, or when you’re constantly worrying that everything you’re saying is boring, that’s when you actually become boring. Also, remember that everyone needs to spend alone time every now and then, so it’s not weird.</p>
<p>The key is to always have something to do, since the cause of your loneliness and feelings of insecurity stem from boredom. You see people wandering the streets in groups of friends, but what you DON’T see is the people who, like you, are alone in their rooms/in the library/etc. So stop feeling self-conscious and realize independence is as important–rather, more important–to survival in our society than is social networking, as odd as this may seem. Don’t feel like you have to depend on the presence of others to be happy. Yes, seriously.</p>
<p>As for finding friends, just call those classmates up. Or ask them when you run into them next time. Go join a club. Attend an advertised event on campus. It’s not that hard to find people to go out to eat with…but it IS much harder to find a true, close friend you can tell your deepest secrets. So don’t expect the latter to happen quickly, and two months is certainly not enough time for the kind of relationship I believe you are looking for…the kind you’re used to from high school, I guess.</p>
<p>But my weekends are usually jampacked working so I don’t care much. Inherently, I am an introvert and so I tread very carefully in situations with other people but I wouldn’t call myself “shy”. Common social behaviors that are second nature to some people are more difficult for me to master (i.e. going out to lunch with a girl from my hall who I don’t know very well). College is a great place to branch out, but my personality isn’t going to change that fast, if at all. I know my limits and can act accordingly though :p. And secretly, I love spending time with me :). I use my alone time to get my crap done, then work on socializing. </p>
<p>I’d suggest getting involved with an organization or something that allows you to meet people in a more structured environment, then moving out from there to other stuff. It helps me, anyway :p.</p>