<p>I agree with the comments about letting him ‘fail’ and find his own motivation, and the article link posted above was excellent. I wish I had backed off my oldest son (now a HS senior, admitted to 7 colleges so far including his top choice :)) sooner! I worry a little that I’ve been too helicopter-y and he will struggle in college. Love it when he pushes back at me now and says “I’ve got this, mom”.</p>
<p>But I also know that positive motivation helps, because my freshman “B” regular track son became a junior “A” / AP student. Three “carrots” did the trick, YMMV: 1)money (I offered him cash junior year, ONLY for an A for the FULL YEAR, classes like gym and electives didn’t count. He got 5 of them!); 2)visiting beautiful college campuses and meeting beautiful college co-eds at schools that were just a tad out of reach for a B student (we started sophomore year - will be starting freshman year with next son!) and 3) getting a job as a busboy at a restaurant - taste of the real world.</p>
<p>I’m sure some folks will jump on me recommending paying for grades, but it works with some kids. My son likes to have the best of everything, so I knew it would work for him. He loved buying Ray Ban sunglasses and his own iphone with the money he earned. I view it like a real world lesson: work hard, perform, and you earn more; you also feel a sense of accomplishment when you buy yourself a treat that isn’t just handed to you. And paying only for the final yearly grade allowed me to lay off somewhat in worrying about every homework and test grade - and caused him to begin to pay attention to them!</p>