<p>OP, please let us know what happens after your mother calls the dean. I think you may be right that the situation has already been decided. I think that your roommate is probably on the way out of college, and it may happen sooner than you think.</p>
<p>^That sounds likely.</p>
<p>and probably explains why nobody wants to violate the roomie’s right to privacy by explaining that since she’s already heading home, they are not going to take immediate action unless she appears to be imminently dangerous.</p>
<p>I think you are smart to start disengaging yourself. It will help you mentally and logistically, and it will also perhaps force the issue on her side, if no one is there to bail her out. Good luck!!</p>
<p>Just talked to my mom who said she called but the Dean was not available so she left her name and number. I did get an email from my resident director asking me what hall I wanted to be in next semester and he said he would really try and look… So I guess that is better than nothing. Only time will tell how this all works out. </p>
<p>I think regardless of how this turns out you have comported yourself well. As a parent I have been impressed with your maturity and caring. Let us know how this turns out and good luck with your studies.</p>
<p>^ Ditto what Sue said. If I were your mom I’d be very proud of you. Heck, I don’t even know you and I’m very proud of you :)</p>
<p>I do hope of course that all the history with roommate and issues and reports to RA and Resident Director have been documented and I would keep at the Dean of Students to see how quickly he/she responds to both you and to your parents. One of the above posters had a very good summary of what needs to be accomplished in either a phone meeting or an in-person meeting and then reiterated by your parents/mom. Also whatever the outcome, I would ask they verify whatever they decide to you in an email so if not resolved satisfactorily you have a paper trail.</p>
<p>@kgal1996: I’ve followed this thread silently and I’m extremely impressed with the way you’ve handled the situation. I know people double your age who don’t have half the maturity. You’ve taught me a lot and made me a little more sensible 
Hope everything works out for you and your roommate! You’re wonderful!</p>
<p>I believe this roommate will not be back next semester if she cannot pay her bills and therefore cannot register. So, if you can endure the situation through the end of the semester, you likely can stay in your Honors dorm room with a new roommate. Try not to switch dorms. I believe the RA is bullsh*tting you about sincerely seeking an alternative dorm.</p>
<p>Also, your university definitely has written policy about how to deal with “students in crisis” (roommate). Your mom and you should ask for that policy if you can’t find it online. Read it and ask yourself: Has protocol been followed (as evidenced by what you see happening with your roommate)?</p>
<p>I am stunned by the ham-handedness of your school’s student support system staff and admins. Keystone cops. A tragedy in the making. </p>
<p>Hello everyone. As of today there has been no further action by the school as far as communicating to us a plan for next semester. I am getting a little anxious because the deadline for submitting room changes is this coming Wednesday and the semester ends on December 12 (you have to move to your new room by end of this semester). So there is not much time for me to figure everything out in the midst of finals and stuff, like if they tell me I can’t get a new room - that is not much time to get my parents up here for a meeting or something.</p>
<p>I have been home for break but I have seen my roommate posting such depressing things. For instance</p>
<p>“Please don’t send me back to (our college)”
“My physical and mental health is a mess and none of my friends talk to me anymore. I’m pretty sure by the time any of them decide to help me its going to be too late… way too late.”
“I have nothing and nobody to live for anyway, I’m going to die anyway, why bother?”</p>
<p>So OBVIOUSLY the situation is not getting better! I am so frustrated that the administration seems to think this kind of posting is “under control” and normal! To me this is so obviously suicidal and depressed I can’t believe a bunch of adults don’t see it. I have thought about sending a copy of these posts to my RA/director/dean but I feel like it would have no effect because it seems they have made up their minds. I am counting down the days to when this semester ends. </p>
<p>P.S. and thank you for the kind compliments. </p>
<p>That is so alarming on so many levels. Can you make an appt with the schools counseling services because of the stress it is causing you and bring these posts as well. </p>
<p>Please show your parents, screen shot it and send it to the dean of students. </p>
<p>OP, did the Dean ever return you mother’s call? If I was your parent, I would be down there standing on someone’s desk at this point. You have done everything that could reasonably be expected of any person, let alone student. Your parents need to be a serious squeaky wheel.</p>
<p>“To me this is so obviously suicidal and depressed I can’t believe a bunch of adults don’t see it”</p>
<p>What are your own parents advising you to do? I know your mother called the Dean, did she follow up? </p>
<p>That’s very worrying. I agree you should let someone in authority know about the posts you’ve seen. </p>
<p>I continue to hope that the school IS paying attention and that your roommate has had some counseling. I mean, just because someone who’s depressed has seen a therapist doesn’t mean they’re suddenly all better and not depressed any more. But posts mentioning thoughts of suicide do warrant some kind of intervention. </p>
<p>Totally agree, scmom12. If at all possible, maybe one of the OP’s parents could accompany her back to school and get this sorted out in person. At least that’s what I would do for my child, if at all possible. School needs to present a viable relocation plan to OP and her parents, that is acceptable to all concerned. In addition, while there, I would show those latest posts to school officials. This girl is crying for help and it seems the only one who can hear her is OP.</p>
<p>The Dean never returned my mom’s call. Right now my parents are telling me just to focus on finals and if nothing happens this week they will take some more action. To us this is all just a pattern and if I try to let someone know about the posts I will be brushed off as usual. I think I may email my director the posts anyway. </p>
<p>I agree that emailing the posts is the most you can really do right now.</p>
<p>Good luck during finals, and your parents are right – you should try not to let this stress you out and distract you from your work. </p>
<p>About submitting the request to change rooms – do you have to know what room you’d be requesting, or can you just submit a generic request? If the latter, you might want to get that in by the deadline. Although nobody knows what will or won’t happen with your roommate, you know you don’t want to continue in your current situation next semester. It would suck if you had to move out of the honors dorm, but maybe you could move back in next year?</p>
<p>Maybe it’s possible to request a move contingent on an honors dorm placement. There must be someone leaving at the semester for one reason or another.</p>