How to be friends with Asians? Dating Asian guys?

Pre-College Issues High School Life
21

<p>MissTi: "Why would you want to be friends with and/or date someone who you think is racist or is that disrespectful and close minded?"</p>

<p>I think you've hit the nail on the head. I wish I could think more like you! I have to work with these kids on a day to day basis, and do talk to them frequently, (other than this "asian obsession" they have, these kids are really cool/intelligent interesting), so any insight on understanding their behavior is helpful. I guess I'm just the kind of person who likes to be friends with everyone. ^^;;</p>

<p>Thanks everyone for your comments/advice so far! They have helped me understand the minds of these kids at my school a little better. I'm certainly not someone who ONLY wants to date asians/be friends with asians, but I think I understand more now how to deal with these types of behaviors should they arise again. :)</p>

22

<p>black girls are not hot
hispanic definitely
NOT BLACK</p>

23

<p>About the speaking Chinese thing, sometimes it's just natural to speak in your native language with other people who speak it. I don't think they're doing it consciously to annoy you or something. When I'm around my Chinese friends, I just lapse into speaking Mandarin for no reason at all.</p>

24

<p>yanners: I can understand that (English is technically my second language too), but I'm not so sure if that's the reason. All of the asians I know speak English better than Chinese. Take this situation for example:</p>

<p>Me, a Cantonese-speaking friend, two Ma friends and two white friends are sitting around talking about class. Suddenly my two Mandarin speaking friends (who speak English better than they speak Mandarin) switch to Mandarin in mid sentence and seem to make a joke about something. This happens very frequently. I'm a little annoyed but don't say anything, but my Cantonese friend is kind of ***<em>ed says something like "hey guys, that's not cool, we don't speak that language". One of them laughs and says in a condescending tone "Well it's not our fault you don't speak Chinese, Lucy</em>", and continues to talk in Chinese with the other guy.</p>

<p>That is usually how these kids speak Chinese. A lot of my non-Mandarin speaking friends (even some asian ones) comment on how annoying it is that some of these people will just randomly start talking in Mandarin, even though they were born here and speak flawless/native speaker English. What do you think about it? How should I/my other friends react to this?</p>

<p>I have half a mind to just start randomly speaking in my language in front of them and make a joke just so they can see how it's rude.</p>

25

<p>irap: you don't think beyonce's hot? lol</p>

<p>
[quote]
VH1 voted her the number 1 hottest hottie/100 of 2004; and BET voted her #2 out of 25 shades of fine women for 2005; and ETV voted her #4 out of 101 sexiest celebrity bodies of 2006.

[/quote]
</p>

26

<p>beyonce is a differetn case i meant most black girls arent hot...</p>

27

<p>Sometimes I speak in Korean with my Korean friends b/c otherwise, my Korean will get rusty and accented. Somehow, despite being born in Canada and speaking predominantly English since school, I have kept a very native-sounding accent, and I don't want to lose that.</p>

<p>But most of the time, I speak in English to all my friends. And I agree that it is extremely rude for Chinese kids (or whatever ethnicity) to purposely exclude others by reverting to their native language when English will perfectly suffice. It only creates boundaries between them and the non-Chinese community. This is not a culture-destroying extreme process of assimilation; it's just common manners to allow everyone to know what the hell you're talking about. </p>

<p>
[quote]
black girls are not hot
hispanic definitely
NOT BLACK

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Says you. I despise Asians like you (if you are Asian). You probably whine about every perceived injustice from the "white man", yet you embody all of his worst prejudices thoughts. You're just a typical white racist in an Asian body.</p>

<p>I perceive the aforementioned attitude to be prevalent in older immigrant Asians, like parents. They always complain ad nauseum about the "suh yyang nom", which literally means "white bastards" in Korean, whenever they perceive the slightest slight (whether it be a rude cashier or a bad driver). But their racial attitudes, especially towards blacks, are identical to the typical white racist. I mean, for all their supposed hardships as minorities, they cannot have one iota of sympathy for their oppressed brothers and sisters? Apparently, not.</p>

28

<p>Irap3pillows, yes they are. Ha ha not only Beyonce, Tyra Banks and the America's Next Top Model Gir I forgot her namel. :]</p>

29

<p>Yeah, not to mention that Beyonce also got #3 on VH1's 100 Most Wanted Bodies, and Jennifer Lopez got like .. #17</p>

<p>And there are more than Beyonce, and here name was Eva, sneakiie ;) </p>

<p>Everyone has their own opinion, but it's not good to be so close-minded.
In fact I'm listening to a song now, "open your eyes, open your mind"</p>

30

<p>your talking about celebrities
have you seen hot black girls in general? NO</p>

31

<p>bouncechrissy, what skool u goto? can i get a #? ;) man i wish i can think up of a pickup line</p>

<p>for real, its like that at our skool, cept i'm the chinese guy that talk out loud in chinese in class alot</p>

<p>if the azn at ur skool r like me, they wouldnt have any problem going out w/ u... but a few my chinese friends... might not go out w/ white girls...</p>

<p>maybe when they got a lan party or study group u can go to so u interested in getting closer (ok thats a joke)</p>

<p>but fo real, we do alot of <em>fun</em> stuff in groups (and yea lan parties), usually only chinese ppl get invited... but they would never plainly reject sb cuz they aint chinese</p>

<p>and good luck... what college u think ur going to? :wink:</p>

32

<p>Yes, I have seen "hot" black girls. She's from my school. =] You need to travel more, Irap3pillows. :P! </p>

<p>Thanks Sarorah! :] Yes, Eva is pretty. Eva is an example of a "hot" black girl before she became a model! :] So ha!</p>

33

<p>o yea, speaking chinese... idk, if they start outta no'where thats freaky cuz everyone i know, if a conversation starts in english, the only way it turns to chinese is if sb just comes into the coversation and breaks into chinese... then other ppl may or maynot start speaking chinese</p>

<p>but i definately spend at least 90% of my time in skool talking in chinese... cuz all conversation just starts there</p>

<p>guess i can forget that #</p>

34

<p>Irap, those black girls in those music videos are FINE (not all of them, but a lot of 'em).</p>

<p>Black girls are hot. Okay okay, so... maybe most of the time (from what i See) they're more like BUTTERFACES, but hey. And need we remind you that the girls who got onto America's Next Top Model are NOT celebrities. (They are now if they won)</p>

<p>In my school, I can only pick up a handful of black girls I think are hott. I can pick up maybe a little more mexicans who are hott. Asians - I can pick up less than the # of black girls who are hott (though they are generally "cute"). HOtt white girls out number the other races. But though the minority population of my school seems to be pretty even, there are still more white people. (In total, more minorities, but when you divide them up, more white people).</p>

<p>UHm, what was my point?</p>

<p>Ya, I was going to add that it IS a racial thing. See that asians hang with asians, blacks with blacks, mexicans with mexicns, and whites with whites. Well, I noticed that usually with whties, it really ISN'T a racial thing to THEM, but minories don't join their group as often because it may be a racial thing to the minorities. If that makes sense. I'm probably making a full of myself. Whites are like... conditioned to not be racist and then allow other races to do whatever they want. That's why no WHITE HISTORY MONTH for yoooz.</p>

<p>If you want to hang with the aznz, get one of the nerdy aznz in your class to be your friend. There are Cool aznz and Nerdy aznz and they all hang together (that's how it is at my school).</p>

<p>Yeah... well... flames?</p>

35

<p>Quitejaded, you're my hero. :)</p>

36

<p>Haha! okay cool :)</p>

37

<p>
[quote]
Ya, I was going to add that it IS a racial thing. See that asians hang with asians, blacks with blacks, mexicans with mexicns, and whites with whites. Well, I noticed that usually with whties, it really ISN'T a racial thing to THEM, but minories don't join their group as often because it may be a racial thing to the minorities. If that makes sense. I'm probably making a full of myself. Whites are like... conditioned to not be racist and then allow other races to do whatever they want. That's why no WHITE HISTORY MONTH for yoooz.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Here's an interesting thought: who creates the racial cliques? The majority (whites) or the minorities (black, Asian). </p>

<p>There's no white history month because European/white American history is the status quo in the American curriculum.</p>

38

<p>I think everyone does. Everyone in the racial cliques will create stereotypes. The reason there is no white history month because the white people didn't change anything. I mean the white history month is more like July 4, the Independence Day. o_O; You learn about who did what and stuff like that.</p>

<p>Happy Martin Luther King, Jr changed United States. Black History Month is created because the blacks did something that changed the United States, too. </p>

<p>o_o Do I make any sense at all?</p>

39

<p>I feel minorities drag it out and enjoy it. Yes, there's still some racist problems, but this time, giving black race credit because a black person invented peanut butter isn't going to help. Anyone disagree?</p>

<p>And you know what I mean. There's not "White Club" or "Whte Entertainment Television".</p>

<p>There's a "Hispanic Month" in March or May. I don't know what THEY did. Black History month, you're supposed to learn about King, Jesse, Carver, X, etc..</p>

40

<p>Who are you?</p>

<p>First of all...Fob's are immigrants a.k.a. Fresh off the boat. There are many kinds of fobs</p>

<p>Twinkie
- Besides your nationality, there is little to distinguish you from white people
- Your significant other is not Asian and never has been
- You have few Asian friends, if any
- You are embarrassed at family events because you cannot speak your language and everyone has to switch to English to communicate with you
- You have no idea that the other types of Asians on this list even exist
- You think Hello Kitty is dumb and do not know what Sanrio is
- You are the only Asian on this list that does not know what Bubble Tea is
- You drive a Ford or some other domestic car and if you drive a Honda, it is stock</p>

<p>Asian-American
- You claim yourself as Asian, but real Asians think you're whitewashed and non-Asians see you as a foreigner. You fit in nowhere
- You have heard of Bubble Tea but have never actually had any
- You are confused about your cultural identity and express this frustration through spoken word performances at your college
- You read A. magazine and think it's great
- You do not know who Leon, Aaron, Sammi, Hikki, or Kangta are
- You are only vaguely aware of the other Asians below</p>

<p>Yap (Young Asian Professional)
- You are in one of these professions:
a) Medicine / Pharmaceutical
b) Engineering
c) Finance
d) Investment Banking
e) Accounting
- Most of your wardrobe was purchased at Banana Republic
- You go to "mixers" on Thursday nights to meet other Yaps and talk about the Dow Jones.
- You did exactly what your parents wanted you to do and as a result, your life is hella boring
- Your apartment/home is decorated almost exclusively with stuff from Pier 1
- Your parents always talk to their friends about how much money you make. If they don't, then you're a dissapointment</p>

<p>Fob (Fresh Off tha Boat)
- You were not born in America
- You know who Leon, Aaron, Sammi, Hikki, and Kangta are. In fact, you have seen them at Atlantic City or Las Vegas recently
- You speak your native language fluently and so do all your friends
- You do not have any non-Asian friends
- Your parents do not speak any English
- When you speak English, you like to make everything plural
- You get extremely good grades in school
- You cannot dance
- Your fashion sense comes from whatever country you're from and you incorporate nothing from American fashion into your wardrobe</p>

<p>SuperFob
- Your command of the English language is minimal and you don't care
- You like dim sum chicken feet
- You do not own a single CD, VCD, Video game, or DVD that isn't bootlegged
- Your only hangout is Chinatown
- All the lights in your house are fluorescent
- You dry your cloths outside your window
- You need a haircut
- You either smell like cigarettes or food</p>

<p>Fobabee
- You are an Asian-American or Twinkie who has recently "awoken"
- You have a newly found fetish of Asian girls/boys
- You have taken the Asian Studies course at college
- You are trying to learn as much as possible about your culture to make up for your lifetime of trying to be white (Twinkie ; Banana) or Black (Chigger ; Tea egg)
- If you are lucky, you will grow to become Fobulous</p>

<p>Gangsta Fob (Fobsta)
- You have shot another Asian
- Your favorite hangout is a pool hall
- When you talk, you sound like a cross between a Fob and an urban black kid
- Your hair looks silly, but no one will tell you because you'll shoot them
- You have a serious gambling problem
- You are a Rice-boy, but your mods are cheap and are never painted to match the rest of your car
- No one tells you your rice ride looks cheap because you'll shoot them
- You want to have a Tab girlfriend, but can only get Hoochie Tabs</p>

<p>Tab (Trendy Asian B*tch)
- You shop at A/X, Bebe and Club Monaco
- You only wear black and will occasionally wear white to "mix it up"
- You do not weigh more than 105 lbs
- You have never paid for dinner at a restaurant in your life
- Platform heels are your favorite
- You are a makeup expert, in fact, you appear completely flawless
- You do not smile in public
- You are the object of desire of all Asian men and you know it
- You smoke
- Your cell phone is completely customized
- On the inside flip of your cell phone is a sticker pic of you and your man
- Somewhere in your purse is a Sanrio item
- You only date Asian and will only date a boy with a nice car
- You are often seen with Rice-boys
- You never travel alone. You are either in the company of other Tabs or your Rice-boy boyfriend</p>

<p>Hoochie Tab
- You are an import car model
- Your boobs are not real
- There are naked pictures of you floating around on the internet somewhere
- Stiletto heels are your favorite
- Your role models are Francine Dee and Kaila Yu
- Your boyfriend is a Gangsta Fob
- You cheat on your boyfriend/girlfriend
- Unlike most Asians, you do not do well in school</p>

<p>Rice-Boy
- You drive an Asian import. Usually a Honda or Acura
- Your souped up car (known as a Rice-ride or Rice-rocket) is unrecognizable from it's original stock form
- Your exhaust pipe is big enough for your head to fit in
- The spoiler on your car looks like it was made by Boeing
- The interior of your car also looks like it was designed by Boeing
- You always drive like you are racing someone
- You are not afraid of dying in a crash, but you are afraid of speed bumps and parking lot on-ramps
- The only other person besides yourself who can sit in your car is your 105 lbs Tab girlfriend. If anyone else sits in your car, the entire bottom of it will be touching the ground
- Even though your car is a Honda, it goes faster and is worth more than a Lotus Esprit
- If you drive a Civic, your dream car is a Supra. If you drive a Supra, your dream car is a Skyline (which you can never have). Poor Rice-boy.</p>

<p>Fobulous
- You speak perfect English and you are fluent in your native language
- You have Asian friends as well as non-Asian friends
- You listen to Asian pop as well as American music
- You are equally aware of both popular American culture and Asian pop culture
- You are a good dancer
- You date Asian by choice even though you could rock the opposite sex of any other race
- You are a good designer and have superior Html skills
- You have an Apt107 page AND an AA page and the guest books in both are packed
- For you, FOB stands for Fabulous Oriental Being
- You have lots of Asian pride</p>

<p>Pob
- A Filipino fob.
- Words that start with F tend to be pronounced with a P. (**** you..Pobarized version: PUCK you)
- Full accent</p>