<p>ohhhhh goodness, tell your son i am so unbelievably familiar with the story it hurts me!!</p>
<p>prestige v fit was my biggest struggle last year, and i chose fit. one day someone asked me "if both schools were seriously called UVa, which one would you go to?" and i picked what was, at the time, not only a fit but also my safety (whereas UVa was my dream, reach, number 1, you name it).</p>
<p>i wonder what makes the harder one so much better? pride is a huge thing for sure, but really...college is what he makes of it. you can tell him that, but it's almost better to save your breath because he won't listen :)</p>
<p>here's another way i "justified" choosing the fit over the reach: while i could academically succeed at UVa, i could academically excel at my school now. and let me be the first to say that academically excelling first semester takes a lot of weight off my shoulders and allows me to focus on other non-academic aspects of college. you know like, leaving home for the first time, completely rebuilding my core of friends, loving my sorority...etc.</p>
<p>so, perhaps, if he did a lot of academics in high school, he would really benefit from going to a school that doesn't stress academics as much. it's really a refreshing eye opener for me to realize that the world really doesn't revolve around grades and courses and that it's okay to have fun at school or go to a football game or go to a kegger on a monday night just for the hell of it.</p>
<p>remind him that college is a package and a whole experience and then see if he still wants the top one. if he's picking it just for the name, encourage him to look somewhere else. if he really likes it and it just happens to have the better name, maybe he really could belong there!!!</p>
<p>all the best,
kristin</p>