How to make someone realise what they can do...

Chance Me / Match Me!
1

<p>My friend is, like me, a junior in a very competitive (selective) IB magnet at a public HS. Her profile is like...
3.9ish GPA
High 2100s SAT (800M, CR mid-high 600s after 2 tests)
internship at NIH for about a year and a half now, will go to work paid over the summer for the second time, now
pretty much all AP classes, likely to get 5s in 4-5 of them this year
3 years of cross country, 1 varsity (only junior on girls' varsity), but not really recruitment-competitive
born in Russia, has lived primarily there, Switzerland, and in the US. Moved to the US around 6th grade, didn't speak english before. was accepted to a competitive IB magnet school 2 years thereafter. thus, she speaks 3 languages: german, russian, and english (4 if you count french, which she is basically fluent in. passed AP in 8th grade).
speaks english fluently, but CR-kind of stuff is rather hard for her.
teaches Art of Problem Solving to little kids every weekend, also teaches french to little sister and her friend.
All As in math and science so far (struggling with physics this year)
looking towards Bio-engineering.
Hoping for schools like tufts, columbia, MgGill, JHU, maybe Harvey Mudd (trying to convince her MIT).</p>

<p>this girl has amazing potential and talent. she works very hard and is very self-driven. </p>

<p>From what she's told me, in a Russian household, you're pretty much never told that you're special. It's not that you're neglected or unloved, but your parents don't smother you with praise every time you do something right (or pretty much ever). Her parents love her, and they don't berate her for failure and incompetence (hell, they hardly pay attention to her schoolwork) but being told that you're special and unique is just something that they never do, and that Russian parents never do. If you do something great, hey, maybe that means you're not so average. But it never makes you a special kid in anyone's eyes.</p>

<p>Because of this, she really doesn't believe she has any chance at anything other than our state university (state school is very good in engineering, but there are places she'd rather go). All those other places are for people with real talent, whereas she just gets the grades and scores she does through either luck or a whole lot of work. I realise that the places I listed at are reach schools for anyone, and that even with her stats, she could very well get rejected.
However, she is quite unique in her work ethic, linguistic ability, ability to overcome her English barrier, and area of interest, and I think she legitimately stands as much a chance at getting in to some of these schools as any other competitive applicant. She's going to apply. However, if you don't believe you stand a chance at a school, you can't write your applications with passion, which makes it even harder to get in. </p>

<p>Finances will likely be an issue, which makes places like Columbia and MIT more attractive, as they are so generous with aid.</p>

<p>How do I convince someone like this that they have the potential to do well and to get in to these kinds of schools? She is able to do so much more than she thinks she can.</p>

2

<p>bump 10char</p>

3

<p>Tell her to come on here and create a ‘Chance’ thread with all of the colleges she wants to attend.</p>

<p>Then someone is bound to tell her she is gonna get in.</p>

4

<p>she’s done that, didn’t get many responses, and otherwise doesn’t post on CC that much.</p>

<p>i don’t know whether that’s for the best or not. it could give her either the right perspective (she actually has something going) or the wrong one (omg, people are panicking with stats equal or higher to mine and people are saying they won’t get in anywhere. im screwed!)</p>

<p>i know people who have been on this site for a long time and who say that she’s definitely got a shot at where she’s looking, but it doesn’t help much lol.</p>

5

<p>bump again</p>

6

<p>She has many reaches already on the list you give. It sounds like she’s being reasonable. A 2100 is unlikely to get her into MIT unless she has a hook or amazing accomplishments in a math/science related activity.</p>

7

<p>hmom:
High 2100s. 2190, to be precise.
I’d say that she has a pretty good hook (teaching, speaking 4 languages, english being her 3rd, manages her top grades along with XC in the fall and what is essentially a part-time job for her at NIH). That and she’s a young woman interested in the maths/sciences, and who gets very good grades in an essentially all-AP schedule, including in subjects like history and a very difficult english class. doesn’t guarantee anything, but makes her a little bit more unique.</p>

<p>I realise that most of those are very reachy (namely Hopkins, MIT, Columbia) for anyone. Less reachy include UMD, BU, CMU (not sure how interested she still is, but she visited and liked it), perhaps Northeastern. But I think she has a legitimate shot, or at least as much of one as any other competitive applicant. She just kind of immediately dismisses the prospect of getting in to somewhere as prestigious as MIT or Columbia. I don’t think she’s guaranteed. I honestly don’t know if she’s likely. But I don’t think it’s a laughable prospect. And it becomes more impossible to get in to such places if your application makes you look like you don’t think you’re worthy.</p>

8

<p>bump… 10char</p>

9

<p>Footballer, the things you list as hooks are not hooks and are not unusual in the world of top schools. 2190 is a good score but below median at MIT, Columbia and probably HM. She is certainly a credible candidate anywhere, but I think she has realistic reaches.</p>

10

<p>I was under the impression that managing to have an active and interesting life outside of school while averaging 1 B a semester in a full IB programme was indeed unusual.</p>

<p>My goal here isn’t to convince her that she’s going to get in to these top schools. I don’t know if she is. I think she has a shot.</p>

<p>What I’m trying to convince her is that the state flagship isn’t her only option with her record; academically, and maybe financially.</p>

11

<p>I’m glad that you’re doing such a nice thing for your friend and that you have such faith in her abilities. However, in the end, it is her choice. State universities are cheaper (you mentioned financial aid), so this might play a big role in her decision. I can relate to her; my parents are never ever condescending, but they don’t lather me with praise either. However, I’m actively pursuing some Ivies because this is something I really want to do. I really don’t think her parents have so much to do with her decision.
But on another note, maybe try tell her that she has nothing to lose. Since her goal is an in-state university (and her stats will probably get her in), why not try for something higher? An extra application could lead to a whole new life. I think she should definitely explore all available possibilities.</p>

12

<p>Actually, given substantial financial need, places like MIT and the Ivies, with their big endowments from legions of successful graduates, can give financial aid as to make it either of only minimally greater, equal, or even lesser cost. </p>

<p>Her parents aren’t telling her she could never get in to places like MIT or Columbia (well, her dad would, but it would probably be half-serious sarcasm). </p>

<p>She’s probably going to apply. She visited columbia and really liked it. I just worry that she’s going to write those applications kind of thinking “yeah, right, as if,” which kind of diminishes your chances from the start.<br>
she’s just kind of resigned to going to state school (not the worst option she could have, but she isn’t really liking the place) instead of thinking she has an honest shot at getting in to a place that is really good and may even have boatloads of aid to give out.</p>

13

<p>When I worked in admissions we really enjoyed the occasional modest candidate! She’ll be fine.</p>