I’ve been at college for about a month now, and I’ve somewhat struggled socially. My roommates and I are friendly but I wouldn’t hang out with them. I’ve met a couple of kids that I hang out with every weekend but that’s about it. I’ve met so many kids but I end up just getting their Snapchats and we don’t end up connecting again. I’ve involved myself pretty well, I went on one hike through my hall, and on another through the hiking club. I enjoyed the hiking club but none of the kids were really my type. I guess I’m just worried that I’m never going to find a group of friends. I’m hoping that when ski season starts that I will meet a ton of people in the Freeride club. I’m also trying to find some kids that like to watch football, but it’s kinda hard to just force that. I guess I’m just wondering how normal this is. Is there anything more I can do to try and find my group of people? Should I just stick with my two friends for now and let my group of friends form naturally? How worried should I be?
This may seem like the obvious answer, but it is the obvious answer. Get involved in things that you are interested in that are more long-term focused that you are interested in. A hike or a ski trip is a good start, but the easier ways are going to be through actual clubs - like the Freeride team, a part-time job on campus where you cross paths with a lot of similar-minded people (say maybe the Athletic Center or University center- checking people in you see a lot of the same faces over and over again and also get to know your like-minded co-workers) or even go into a leadership role with one of the Adventure clubs (where you meet everybody as they come in). If you are into football - get on a flag football team or join a intramural sports team. If you see study groups pop up for classes - hit those too.
It does take effort and there will likely be some awkward introductions/early goings but more is more in this case. The more people you cross paths with the more you are going to have the chance to click with. And Freshman year is important. It is where most (not all) of your friendships happen.
It is 100% totally normal to be feeling this way. It might seem like lots of people have “found their groups” but everyone is feeling this to some degree even if they don’t seem like they are. It just takes time. My D19 who is at a really large school is feeling similar. She likes her roommates, but they’re both foreign from the same country and so have a lot in common with each other, not so much with my kid. It is a really respectful, nice, pleasant living situation but like you, she doesn’t really hang out with them and is a bit envious of those who have roommates who do hang out. I remind her about all the drama she’s heard about from friends who have “friend” roommates and she’s happy that she’s been free of that.
You’ve been doing the right things with trying out clubs. The suggestion of a P/T job is a great one, too. That’s where I met my crew when I was at college. Also, as you get more in depth with a major, you’ll meet people that way (at least I did).
Bottom line, know that it’s 100% normal, that it takes time and it’ll be a little bit up and down and that’s okay.
It sounds like you are doing all the right things. I’m sure by now (6 weeks after the original post) you have met more people or are so busy with class work that you aren’t looking for more ways to spend your time.
I just saw a facebook posting for the CU ski buses to several of the major resorts, and only $10 through the Herd.