I am a junior in college. Everything is going great, etc, but this year, I am living in a dorm again after living in a suite last year, and I hate the cramped feeling that comes with it. I do not have a roommate, but even living in a single feels restrictive to me. My room is very small due to the fact that it’s a single, and I am on the ground floor in an all guys building, so I know the weekend noise will at times be bad. I do not have a kitchen and am unable to cook, so have to eat every lunch and dinner either at the dining hall or at a restaurant. I sacrificed quality in order to not have a roommate, which I know is a good thing, but my dad asked me over the summer if I wanted a one bedroom or 2 bedroom apartment off campus, and I said he didn’t have to. However, I did not realize how important this extra space would be to me. It would be so much more private and I could cook, and some of them would be cheaper than the dorms. I am also on an entirely sophomore floor, and seeing my friends’ apartments made me resent having to come back to my dorm. I was up until 5am last night afraid that if I didn’t say something last night, all the apartments would be gone, which is not true. I do want to mention to my parents that I want to try to look for a place a block or so off campus, but I’m afraid they will not be ok with it since I didn’t say it in the summer. My dad would have to pay the rent since I realistically can’t. I feel bad asking them when the semester has already started, but how can I approach the subject? And should I start talking to agents on my own to get a head start anyway? I did live in a dorm freshman year, so it’s not like I can say I’m not trying since I have done it before. Also, on my campus, very few juniors and up live in halls. They either live in suites or off campus. I’d be fine with a suite also if any of my friends had an open spot, but as of now, none do.
First you need to find out if you can cancel your dorm contract. Once you have that information tell your parents you reconsidered and, if it’s still an affordable option for them, that you’d like to explore it. You may have to wait until next semester or even next fall, depending on your contract, but you can get the discussion started. Good luck.
Start off by talking to your parents and asking if they would let you move next semester. Tell them what you wrote here. If they agree you can start looking for a good living situation (maybe someone you know will leaving campus for an abroad program next semester and you can live with friends).
I imagine your parents have paid for the dorm for this semester already. It is probably unlikely, but if you can move into an on-campus suite that would be a good answer so ask ResLife about any openings. IMO it would be completely unreasonable to ask them to double pay and get you an off-campus apartment this semester especially since it was your decision to stay on campus.
Communication is important so making sure that you are telling them what you told us here is key. If you cannot cancel the dorm contract for this semester, next semester is always a possibility.
Does your school offer on-campus apartment living? My son lived on campus all 4 years - he liked being close to everything. He lived in a 3 bedroom apartment with a full kitchen and washer/dryer. You sound like a great young person - tell your parents now how you are feeling so you can all come up with a plan for next semester, and contact campus housing now via email to see what your options are. Save your email communications so you have a record of what was said.
My kid is currently a sophomore. After living in the freshman dorm last fall, she and some friends came up with a plan to live off campus in an apartment this year. (She attended boarding school, so last year was her fifth year of dorm living – I understand the desire to leave the dorm.) I told her that I’d support the plan IF she could put together a PowerPoint presentation (no, I’m not kidding) showing the pros and cons of moving off-campus, the financial benefits, and contingency plans (like, what happens if one of the kids goes on medical leave and leaves school – who picks up their share of the rent?). I am told that I was NOT the only parent of this group to ask for such a presentation. As it turned out, the kids couldn’t get their act together in time for the housing deadline last spring, and so my daughter is living with a roommate in a brand new sophomore dorm this year. She now has plenty of time to put together a plan for next year. (There is no way I would have supported her moving off campus last year when dorm fees where already paid. ) If you present the plan to your parents in a fact-based rather than emotion-based manner, you’ll have a better chance of success, I think! Good luck!
Yes they do, and I was in it last year. But if I do that I could be stuck with 3 random people that I don’t know if I’ll like. None of my friends have open spaces. So I’d have to stick with the lesser of 2 evils if I didn’t get my own place.
Well, I asked the question yesterday, and the answer is no. I did use all the reasons I talked about on here, but they said I was out of line to even ask and that it wasn’t happening. I don’t have a choice but to stay in the dorms for all of this year, unless I can find an internship that will enable me to afford rent myself. I can’t believe how much I miss living in a suite. I had 7 suite mates, but at least I had a buffer of a living room and kitchen between myself and the hallway. In the dorm, despite having my own room, I still feel like everyone is on top of me, and there’s absolutely nothing between me and the hallway. At night, if there is noise in the hallway (which so far there hasn’t been too much), I have no way of escaping it, even with headphones or the RA, since they really can’t control 60 or so guys. Not being able to cook for myself also blows, because the dining hall food here is exceptionally bad, and I am unable to have a microwave in the room.
Does your dorm not have a single kitchen in it? Or even a microwave in a common area?
Since you have your answer, just try to make the best of your situation. So many kids would LOVE to have a single.
You may want to talk to ResLife to see if you have signed up for your room for the semester or for the year. If you have just signed up for the semester you might ask around and see if any friends have an opening next semester (perhaps someone is going abroad for a semester). Otherwise, make the best of your situation. Never forget how fortunate you are to have the opportunity to live and study at a 4 year college.
@happy1 I’m pretty sure it’s for the semester. However, I don’t know of any friends that have openings in their suites,and the people I know going abroad are living with strangers. I’m absolutely sure there would be a spot somewhere in a 4-person suite, but I can’t decide if I want to take that gamble living with random people for the size upgrade. They could snore, be disrespectful, loud, etc. I still have time but it would be great to have a bigger space.
@suzy100 nope, no stove, and one floor lounge has a microwave, but it doesn’t work. To be able to cook for myself would be amazing, and it would likely be cheaper and of course better than the dining hall. Takeout gets expensive, so I rarely do it. Again though, there is nothing I can do, because I doubt that a part time internship during the semester would pay me enough to be able to afford the monthly rent and deposit on my own.
You said yourself, “I sacrificed quality in order to not have a roommate.” You made a choice, and now you are understanding the consequences. It’s a bummer that you resent your friends’ apartments, but you’re learning the hard way: you can’t have your cake and eat it too. Unless you have your own source of money, you are stuck for now. The grass isn’t always greener, so maybe you can do as @happy1 suggested and look for a vacancy for next semester.
I called the housing office and asked them if there were any vacancies in the suites currently, and there aren’t any. However, I will have to go back and check periodically, as they are not able to tell me even if one becomes available. The worst part to me about the dorms is the lack of privacy and potential for noise. I haven’t been sleeping at all because I think to myself that if the floor gets noisy, there is no way to escape it, since the hallway is right there, and even headphones probably wouldn’t help. This is also an all guys floor, which are known to be louder. I like to have the ease of mind when I sleep that I won’t be disturbed, and I don’t have that in a traditional style dorm, so that has been impacting my rest. I got 5 hours last night and physically feel like crap today (as anyone would after so little sleep). Stupid but true
OP, get some good headphones. They really work.
Order a white noise machine from amazon.
Can you put a small microwave and refrigerator in your single?
@momtogirls2 only a refrigerator, no microwave allowed. I plan to put a refrigerator in eventually, so I can at least vary my lunches. I can keep salads, lunch meats, etc. Dinner is a different story, however. And microwaves are not allowed in the rooms.
Nah just get the White Noise App for your phone.