<p>I feel like such a failure right now. I got into one of my top choice schools and was really excited about college the entire summer and had so many plans; good grades, friends, boy friend and etc. And I feel like I am failing at all already. I've fallen in love with a guy who doesn't even like me a bit and wasted so much time thinking about him instead of doing my work. Plus I've just been really lazy. I didn't do any readings and I don't do my homework. I didn't do any today either. All I do is to stare into the space in classes, take a nap, eat and sleep. I just feel so stupid. I am hating myself. It's only been three weeks but I already feel like I've ruined my college life. I want to start college over. I want good grades, I want to work out and be social. Right now, I am a loser loser double loser. Do I still have a chance to make good grades this semester? Or do I still have a chance to make my college life happpier and more efficient? I was just feeling so down and depressed that I might have ruined everything already. I don't know what my clasess are up to and I didn't try to make friends because I was so focused on one guy who doesn't even like me. And I feel so fat after eating 4 bagels.</p>
<p>Now Help me Please. Help me Get my life straight. Help me start over please. Give me some advice!</p>
<p>Ah…like…do the reading? Do your homework? Talk to people around you? Join clubs?</p>
<p>SERIOUSLY. You know exactly what ALL of your problems are. You know that you’re being a lazy ass. You know you’re wasting life on some whatever guy. You’re not even struggling academically/socially, you’re just not doing anything.
In the end, you’re the only person that can change yourself. No amount of “asking for help” and waiting for some enlightening advice is going to get the job done. If you want good grades, stop whining and pick up your f***ing textbooks.</p>
<p>Unless the guy was gay (or you’re a guy and he was straight) this shouldn’t be an issue considering college guys’ sex drives. I’m guessing your number one issue is your appearance. Working out should definitely help with that. Then you’ll feel more confident and it’ll be easier to do your homework, although you should definitely start doing that now.</p>
<p>youaremine - you are 18 or 19 years old - you haven’t ruined your life in just three weeks of being lethargic! Don’t beat yourself up for having a rough transition into college. I think going and talking to the people in your school’s counseling service is an excellent idea. Also, make yourself go to class and do your homework. You can always start working out and socializing in a month, but if you spend another month digging yourself into a hole academically, it will be more difficult to correct. </p>
<p>Stop beating yourself up and seeing yourself as a loser! Get a fresh start today and move forward. Jump in now and start doing your work. It’s not too late now, but it will be in a month or two (at least for this semester’s grades!). </p>
<ol>
<li> go to your counseling office and talk to them</li>
<li> take a walk every day</li>
<li> start doing your work</li>
<li> smile at people </li>
<li> shift your goals a little to more immediate things (instead of picturing yourself having it all - the grades, the boyfriend, the friends - picture what you want by the end of the week - you went to every class, did the homework, walked or worked out a few times, and smiled and chatted some)</li>
<li> Keep things in perspective - you haven’t set the tone for your entire college career, you’ve just survived a rough transition. One you can look back on at the end of the year and feel proud that you turned it around!</li>
</ol>
<p>You said that having a boyfriend was one of your goals? Take a look at yourself and try and figure out why this is so important to you. Chances are the answer lies somewhere with low self esteem and the feeling that having a man will validate you. It smacks of desperation. Don’t go there! You are only 18 years old. You’ve got to find yourself first. You’ve got to work on becoming a well-rounded, successful, confident individual first. Once you do that is when men will become more attracted to you. Ironically, then it may not seem quite as important.</p>
<p>uh oh. That’s a big problem. You may feel inclined to ignore my advise, but just think about it. Love is actually a very strong word. People mix love with lust all the time. I’m not trying to say I thoroughly understand how you feel, I’m just saying that people use the word “love” for all the wrong reasons, all the time. Two high school couples may say they love each other, but do they really? I’ve been where you are right now (in fact I’ve been through worse), so my advise:</p>
<ol>
<li>get yourself some self confidence one way or another.</li>
<li>find good friends</li>
<li>either make a move or move on. If you stay in between for too long, you’re screwed.</li>
</ol>
<p>
this isn’t a place to be funny. you just made yourself a huge d0uche bag</p>
<p>No one enjoys doing work, you just gotta push yourself to do it.
Doing work sucks. I’ve had a hard time this semester doing anything but once I started I got back into the flow of things. Don’t blow things out of proportion.</p>
<p>LOL! 3 weeks and uve ruined your 200-week college life??! Loose wait, get motivated. get confident. join clubs. get freinds. BE SOCAIL; not passive. And everything will just get better. But confidence comes before everything. You havent ruined anything yet. So i hope ur motivated- good luck!</p>
<p>Emory?! I got accepted there and was gonna go! But it was TOO DANG EXPENSIVE.
anyways. not about me. it’s about you. I agree with the sane people who have posted wise advice on here. It’s just general you-already-know-this stuff. Do your work, make small talk with people you randomly meet, do a free exercise class (like Zumba!), don’t focus so much on boys. I’m trying to do that and it’s quite hard. You just have to think you have 4 more years + the rest of your whole friggin’ life to meet a mate. But you only have a set amount of time to do well in college!</p>
<p>I completely understand what you are saying. I have been in school for a week and a half and I am already behind, BUT there is hope! All you have to do is sit down and DO THE READINGS. USE office hours! I hate my college so much and my motivation to transfer is what will allow me to survive this year.</p>
for now learn how to start loving yourself.</p>