I am a transfer student. Enjoy my essays.

Colleges and Universities A-Z University of Chicago ✅
1

<p>Here are my essays. I would like some feedback despite having turned them in a month ago. But I think they are pretty good, so enjoy? I just put in the first and third essays.</p>

<li>How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning,
community, and future? Please address with some particularity your own wishes and how they relate to Chicago,
including why you want to transfer.</li>
</ol>

<p>I visited the University of Chicago last year when I decided to accompany my parents to a family wedding, to gain an
idea of what the university is about.
What I encountered was something totally beyond my expectations.
I met students that were completely dedicated and focused and along with a tour of the campus, it completely
expanded my thoughts about the University of Chicago. From that point I knew that the University of Chicago was
the school that could offer me the environment, people, future, and most importantly the education that I had always
wanted. The decision to attend the wedding was the best decision I have ever made.
To date, my entire formal post high school education experience has been at my local community college, De Anza
College. I have taken my experience and education at De Anza community college and applied it to my everyday life.
This academic experience, although a brief one, has afforded me the opportunity to be considered and hired for a
part time position with NASA - one of my greatest accomplishments to date. I am grateful for what I have attained
from my community college; however, I feel that the experience is lacking several components that only a full research
university can offer. After visiting the University of Chicago, I know that indeed my feelings are correct.
The main reason why the University of Chicago became my number one choice is the fact that on my visit I witnessed
an environment where people are extremely passionate about learning and dedicated to furthering their education. I
have found that when I am passionate about something, I am overwhelmingly dedicated to it almost to an obsession. I
also know that when I work alongside people who are equally as passionate about those things it helps motivate me
to work and learn at a higher level than I would have thought possible. Chicago offers me a focused academic
environment housing students who have consciously decided that higher education is of the utmost value. After
witnessing the environment of the University of Chicago I feel De Anza College, despite all the opportunities it has
afforded me, no longer quenches my desire to further my educational and cultural experiences.
This ethos that I observed at the University of Chicago is exactly what I want to become a part of at the
university. The academics at the University of Chicago are unparalleled, especially in my major of economics, a field
that I found to be my calling in the time I spent at De Anza College. The University of Chicago can provide an access
to world-class professors and a history in that field that will better equip me than any other college I can think of.
Along with this kind of environment that is intensely focused on education, Chicago inspires a student culture geared
towards learning. This dedication by the university can be concretely seen in the low student to professor ratio and the
student commitment can be seen in the amount of students constantly studying in the library. Another opportunity the
university offers that I will most certainly take advantage of is the extensive study abroad program in the United
Kingdom and Paris. This, I feel, will allow me a worldwide point of view that many people lack and also an invaluable
experience to learn in different styles and issues that may not be covered in the United States. The university will also
fill in my knowledge of economics and general education by coloring in the lines that I have set out for myself by
reading economic texts outside of my classes, and the framework De Anza College has created for my education.
Of course the University of Chicago is not solely based on academics alone. On my visit I felt that the university
and its students also exhibited a strong attitude towards extracurricular activates and cultural endeavors. I noticed
that in addition to their studies, Chicago students are passionate about art, music, and sports. This appeals to me
greatly as I genuinely love all three categories. If admitted I will take advantage of the many intramural and
extracurricular sports programs offered, specifically rowing and fencing. The art and music scene of the Chicago
metropolitan area will inspire me to continue my photography and push me to further master the trumpet by interacting
with other students and people who are similarly interested in these fields.
The way I ultimately feel about the University of Chicago and what it offers to me in terms of education, environment,
and future opportunities in comparison to other universities is similar to a forest ecosystem. I feel that other universities
take a linear, by-the-book approach to education in which there are predetermined and predictable tracks for
students, with no room for individual variation in the programs. These universities can be likened to a Christmas tree
farming field, where all of the individual trees are brilliant but they all look more or less exactly the same with only
slight differentiations. Whereas, the dynamic environment and student body of the University of Chicago, along with
its style of education and educational quality, is like a rain forest, thriving and alive with unique and interesting
individuals and exciting ideas around every corner working in a complex symbiosis with each other. Put in those terms
I would prefer to be in the rain forest where individual skills are nurtured and thrive and where students are just not
equated as numbers but their individual questions and ideas are considered. That is why the University of Chicago is
my top choice for higher education.</p>

2

<p>Superstring theory has revolutionized speculation about the physical world by suggesting that strings play a pivotal role
in the universe. Strings, however, always have explained or enriched out lives, from Theseus's escape route from the
Labyrinth, to kittens playing with balls of yarn, to the single hair that held the sword above Damocles, to the basic
awfulness of string cheese, to the Old Norse tradition that one's life is a thread woven into a tapestry of fate, to the
beautiful sounds of the finely tuned strings of a violin, to the children's game of cat's cradle, to the concept of stringing
someone along. Use the power of string to explain the biggest or the smallest phenomenon.
Inspired by Adam Sobolweski, Pittsford Mendon High School, Pittsford, New York
Essay Option 4</p>

<p>The most significant string is not a high tensile ultra strength line found inside one of the Golden Gate Bridge’s
suspension wires. The most significant string is not strung across the bridge of a fine piano or violin by a luthier and
tuned to create a perfect pitch and sound. The most significant string that is the biggest phenomenon is temporary and
arises out of biological means, it is the umbilical cord. This cord is what allows every human to successfully give birth
to offspring and it is what nurtures the fetus every second of its critical development inside the womb. The cord
connects the fetus to its mother and it provides all the necessary ingredients to allow for a normal and healthy
development of a fetus. Without this cord it would be impossible to sustain a pregnancy for humans and other
placental mammals. The cord connects the mother to the center of the fetus and is the primary pathway for a
mother’s body to communicate with the developing fetus inside of her stomach. The umbilical cord can be seen in
other iterations but in those iterations it serves as a critical life line as well. We can see this cord when the astronauts
take space walks, as it tethers their space suits to the “mother ship” of the space shuttle. It also appears with divers
who are supplied precious oxygen and heating from the surface when they go down into the depths of water.
There is a synthetic version of the umbilical cord as well. It is so aptly named “the leash.” It is when mothers strap
their toddlers down to a tether and constantly keep them at a predetermined radius.
I was a victim of the toddler leash.
I could easily blame my mother for being a bad parent and instilling a stigma in me when I was a kid by
subconsciously trying to alter my perceptions in order to constantly keep me within a predetermined distance. But I
won’t. Her reason for doing this to me was to keep me safe and secure with a visual sight. Her connection with me
and most other parents have replicated the umbilical cord in order to constantly feel connected with the child and
when they know the whereabouts of the toddler and that he or she is safe, it gives piece of mind to the parents,
similar to an umbilical cord being the dependable life line between mother and child. This is the ultimate form of
flattery for the umbilical cord because it is being replicated outside of the womb, which shows that the connection
between mother and child still remains after birth. Such is the physiological power the umbilical cord plays in the
birthing process.
Back in the mother’s womb the child has gained enough strength to be birthed and is it when the mother gives birth
that the umbilical cord, the catalyst for providing life for the fetus, is clipped like a ribbon in front of a new building
from the mother and the infant. In the past this integral part of the birthing process was thrown away after it had
served its use for 9 months or less. It seemingly has no more value after birth, until now.
With new research shedding light on cloning and stem cell research it has been found that umbilical cord blood houses
primitive and undeveloped stem cells. These blood cells, which is referred to as cord blood, can be used to “grow”
different organs and even body parts because of the versatility of the stem cells acting as almost a “carte blanc” for
medical scientists. Also parents are now opting to keep the cords in frozen storage as a precaution in order to use it
to stimulate bone marrow growth or other vital cells should the child be diagnosed with a cell related disorder such as
cancer. Although this scientific breakthrough is still in its infancy and there is sizable political controversy surrounding
stem cells and cord blood it is, in my opinion, the next biotechnological step in science. All this centralized in a string
that is no stronger than a shoe string and no longer than the length of your computer mouse cord.
This proves that the most tensile or the most delicate and intricate of string systems such as a suspension bridge or a
grand piano pale in comparison with the large phenomenon that occurs within the human body. The umbilical cord
provides sustenance and life for the fetus and is the main instrument in bringing a new life into the world. That is why
the umbilical cord, a comparatively small string made up of basic organic molecules, is the biggest phenomenon of a
string and displays the power of a string in its most ultimate form.</p>

3

<p>When do transfers find out?</p>

4

<p>I applied EA, so Mid to late april. Normal deadline is mid to late may.</p>

5

<p>What do you think about my essays? You seem to have a good pulse of Uchicago.</p>

6

<p>Solid essays. The first obviously shows your desire and a great amount of passion for ChiTown. I liked the second one too....if that were a casual news article it would have interested me. I liked how you mentioned the creative ways in which the concept of the umbilical cord is still used as a life line even after we leave the womb. The stem cell thing is a hot topic and its always interesting to read about. Good work; you make a sexy candidate I think.</p>

<p>Haha, I did laugh at this though: "There is a synthetic version of the umbilical cord as well. It is so aptly named “the leash.” It is when mothers strap
their toddlers down to a tether and constantly keep them at a predetermined radius.
I was a victim of the toddler leash."</p>

<p>Oh, I remember those things.</p>

7

<p>No offense, but when I see long posts with lot's of line breaks, it drives me crazy to try and read them. I just won't bother, and I'm sure a lot of people feel the same way.</p>

<p>Otherwise, I'd read them and give you an opinion. </p>

<p>Hint: Try using the edit button to fix up all the line breaks.</p>

8

<p>Ill post better formated ones when I go home. I am at work and these macs are messed up with PDF files.</p>

9

<p>I visited the University of Chicago last year when I decided to accompany my parents to a family wedding, only to gain just an idea of what the university is about. </p>

<p>What I encountered was something totally beyond my expectations.</p>

<p>I met students that were completely dedicated and focused and along with a tour of the campus, it completely changed my thoughts about the University of Chicago. From that point I knew that the University of Chicago was the school that could offer me the environment, people, future, and most importantly the education that I had always needed. That decision to attend the wedding was the best decision I could have made. The many things I observed and introduced to in my trip allowed me to decide why the University of Chicago is the school I would prefer to go to over any other university and the reasons are copious.</p>

<p>I have taken my experience and education from my attendance at De Anza community college and applied it to my everyday life. This academic experience, although a brief one, has afforded me the opportunity to be considered and hired for a part time position with NASA - one of my greatest accomplishments to date. I am grateful for what I have attained from my community college; however, I find that the experience is lacking several components that only a larger university can offer, and after visiting the University of Chicago I feel that it can uniquely offer those lacking components. </p>

<p>The main reason why the University of Chicago became my number one choice is due to the fact that on my visit I witnessed in that environment people who were extremely passionate about learning and dedicated to furthering their education. I have found that when I am passionate about something, I am overwhelmingly dedicated to it almost to an obsession. I also know that when I work alongside people who are equally as passionate about those things it helps motivate me to work and learn at a higher level than I would have thought possible. Chicago offers me a focused academic environment housing students who have consciously decided that higher education is of the utmost value. Unfortunately not everyone displays a dedication and passion to learning and I feel that De Anza College, despite all the opportunities it has afforded me, no longer quenches my desire to further my educational and cultural experiences. </p>

<pre><code>This ethos that I observed at the University of Chicago is exactly what I want to become a part of at the university. The academics at the University of Chicago are unparalleled, especially in my concentration of economics, something that I found to be my calling in the time I spent at De Anza College. The University of Chicago can provide me access to world-class professors and a history in that field that will better equip me than any other college I can think of. Along with this kind of environment that is intensely focused on education, Chicago inspires a student culture geared towards learning. This dedication by the university can be concretely seen in the low student to professor ratio and the student commitment can be seen in the amount of students constantly studying in the library. Another opportunity the university offers that I will most certainly take advantage of is the extensive study abroad program in the United Kingdom and Paris. This, I feel, will allow me a worldwide point of view that many people lack and also an invaluable experience to learn in different styles and issues that may not be covered in the United States. The university will also fill in my knowledge of economics and general education by coloring in the lines that I have set out for myself by reading economic texts outside of my classes, and the border the college has created for my education.

Of course the University of Chicago is not solely based on academics alone. On my visit I felt that the university and its students also exhibited a strong attitude towards extracurricular activates and cultural endeavors. I noticed that in addition to their studies, Chicago students are passionate about art, music, and sports. This appeals to me greatly as I genuinely love all three categories. If admitted I will take advantage of the many intramural and extracurricular sports programs offered, specifically rowing and fencing. The art and music scene of the Chicago metropolitan area will inspire me to continue my photography and push me to further master the trumpet by interacting with other students and people who are similarly interested in those fields.
</code></pre>

<p>The way I ultimately feel about the University of Chicago and what it offers to me in terms of education, environment, and future opportunities in comparison to other universities is similar to a forest ecosystem. I feel that other universities take a linear, by-the-book approach to education in which there are predetermined and predictable tracks for students, with no room for individual variation in the programs. These universities can be likened to a Christmas tree farming field, where all of the individual trees are brilliant but they all look more or less exactly the same with only slight differentiations. Whereas, the dynamic environment and student body of the University of Chicago, along with its style of education and educational quality, is like a rain forest, thriving and alive with unique and interesting individuals and exciting ideas around every corner working in a complex symbiosis with each other. Put in those terms I would prefer to be in the rain forest where individual skills are nurtured and thrive and where students are just not equated as numbers but their individual questions and ideas are considered. That is why the University of Chicago is my top choice for higher education.</p>

10

<p>The most significant string is not a high tensile ultra strength line found inside one of the Golden Gate Bridge’s suspension wires. The most significant string is not strung across the bridge of a fine piano or violin by a luthier and tuned to create a perfect pitch and sound. The most significant string that is the biggest phenomenon is temporary and arises out of biological means, it is the umbilical cord. This cord is what allows every human to successfully give birth to offspring and it is what nurtures the fetus every second of its critical development inside the womb. The cord connects the fetus to its mother and it provides all the necessary ingredients to allow for a normal and healthy development of a fetus. Without this cord it would be impossible to sustain a pregnancy for humans and other placental mammals. The cord connects the mother to the center of the fetus and is the primary pathway for a mother’s body to communicate with the developing fetus inside of her stomach. The umbilical cord can be seen in other iterations but in those iterations it serves as a critical life line as well. We can see this cord when the astronauts take space walks, as it tethers their space suits to the “mother ship” of the space shuttle. It also appears with divers who are supplied precious oxygen and heating from the surface when they go down into the depths of water. </p>

<pre><code>There is a synthetic version of the umbilical cord as well. It is so aptly named “the leash.” It is when mothers strap their toddlers down to a tether and constantly keep them at a predetermined radius.
</code></pre>

<p>I was a victim of the toddler leash. </p>

<p>I could easily blame my mother for being a bad parent and instilling a stigma in me when I was a kid by subconsciously trying to alter my perceptions in order to constantly keep me within a predetermined distance. But I won’t. Her reason for doing this to me was to keep me safe and secure with a visual sight. Her connection with me and most other parents have replicated the umbilical cord in order to constantly feel connected with the child and when they know the whereabouts of the toddler and that he or she is safe, it gives piece of mind to the parents, similar to an umbilical cord being the dependable life line between mother and child. This is the ultimate form of flattery for the umbilical cord because it is being replicated outside of the womb, which shows that the connection between mother and child still remains after birth. Such is the physiological power the umbilical cord plays in the birthing process. </p>

<p>Back in the mother’s womb the child has gained enough strength to be birthed and is it when the mother gives birth that the umbilical cord, the catalyst for providing life for the fetus, is clipped like a ribbon in front of a new building from the mother and the infant. In the past this integral part of the birthing process was thrown away after it had served its use for 9 months or less. It seemingly has no more value after birth, until now.</p>

<p>With new research shedding light on cloning and stem cell research it has been found that umbilical cord blood houses primitive and undeveloped stem cells. These blood cells, which is referred to as cord blood, can be used to “grow” different organs and even body parts because of the versatility of the stem cells acting as almost a “carte blanc” for medical scientists. Also parents are now opting to keep the cords in frozen storage as a precaution in order to use it to stimulate bone marrow growth or other vital cells should the child be diagnosed with a cell related disorder such as cancer. Although this scientific breakthrough is still in its infancy and there is sizable political controversy surrounding stem cells and cord blood it is, in my opinion, the next biotechnological step in science. All this centralized in a string that is no stronger than a shoe string and no longer than the length of your computer mouse cord. </p>

<p>This proves that the most tensile or the most delicate and intricate of string systems such as a suspension bridge or a grand piano pale in comparison with the large phenomenon that occurs within the human body. The umbilical cord provides sustenance and life for the fetus and is the main instrument in bringing a new life into the world. That is why the umbilical cord, a comparatively small string made up of basic organic molecules, is the biggest phenomenon of a string and displays the power of a string in its most ultimate form.</p>

11

<p>i second that emotion JohnM. i like to keep my posts short and sweet. kinda like my nose hair.</p>

12

<p>There, those are formated correctly.</p>

13

<p>He was asking them to be formated correctly then he would read them. So I just did.</p>

14

<p>Danoush,</p>

<p>I'll be 100% honest. I liked the second one a lot, but was somewhat bored by the first one.</p>

<p>Your style is something that intrigues me. Most students go to the extremes of being flat out whimsical or flat out philosophical. You seem to escape both pigeonholes. I liked that, and it really worked for the second essay. Even though the 2nd essay was pretty long, I actually wished it could be longer. Like Esquared mentioned, it was like reading an interesting magazine article.</p>

<p>The first one, on the other hand, communicated your reasons pretty clearly, but I think you could have distilled it to about a third of the size. You could have also tried to show why you want to go to Chicago rather than just telling. </p>

<p>But rest easy, the combination is solid. You seem more mature than most students, and I think that will be seen as a plus. Also, the fact that you live in California (unless you are at a different De Anza college than the one I am thinking of) and have actually visited the Chicago campus is a good thing.</p>

<p>BTW, De Anza college? I'm in the bay area too. I'm actually trying to transfer from Skyline College. :)</p>

15

<p>Yup. DA student. Also work at NASA alongside Uchicago graduates and I actually work on a project in conjunction with Uchicago's Yerkes Observatory.</p>

16

<p>Thanks for the comments JohnM.</p>

17

<p>Anyone else?</p>