<p>When I first started posting on CC, my daughter was in jr high and although I was nervous about her dream of studying oboe performance, I supported that dream. We, with the help of many on this board, formulated an academic plan (and she's tried not to feel guilty about not taking every Honors and AP course imaginable) and set to work. There were some things she wouldn't give up that for a few more weeks are eating into her precious time. Of course there's always homework.</p>
<p>From outside sources we've got the assurance (however much you can be assured) that she is capable of going down this long road. School, of all places, has become a different story. She's taking Music Theory and participates in Wind Ensemble, yet feels under constant pressure to find room for Chorus, Pit Orchestra and Marching Band. Most of the top music students participate in all of these. Of course she feels she has a much more realistic understanding from reading certain books, this board, talking to people and other places on what she needs to do. She understands the unbelievable competition. I would say she's one of the top 4 musicians in her school, I don't know maybe first. I think she has the best attitude in that she doesn't go around acting like a prodigy. I don't really want to out myself and location but depending on who reads this the following will give it away-- in the local youth orchestra she has been principle for two years and is given much in terms of encouragement, positive feedback and encouraged to pursue her dream. Her private teacher encourages her and says she is capable but worries about all classical musicians "having a paycheck". But she has never discouraged her from going forward. </p>
<p>In our relatively small 3 county area, she has placed first, second and third on oboe-- third last fall. It was very upsetting to her as she said "if I can't succeed here, how can I get into a good college/conservatory?" I asked her director straight out-- tell us now, please, if this is not the route she should be traveling, if she's not good enough. He said she's been playing top level solos since 7th grade, scoring near perfect and he's behind her. He said for some reason our area has a very strong group of 4-6 oboe players, something that he's never seen. Last year, she was told she didn't make Area All-State. We're not talking All-State, just Area All-State here in NY. (She wasn't eligible for all-state in 10th anyway). Heartbroken, my daughter wondered how that could be. I asked our director how the committee chose students and he said it was totally on score on audition, nothing else. That put me in a predicament-- I had seen three scores and my daughter's was the top. The other two were in Area All-State. I asked him again if he could check the scores. He said he had no access to them. I told him straight out I had seen the scores of other students from different districts, which I had. He made a phone call to the committee head and three hours later received a call that a "mistake" had been made. They had labeled the solo the wrong level was the reason given. But we knew more then one student had played this solo! (And the other scored lower and was in.) They stuck my daughter in at third seat band, a seat that never existed before. This year (based on last years scores) she was given this same "new" third seat after scoring higher on an all-state audition, a few points from 100. I know nobody got a 100. We were contacted by a few teachers I know in different districts, and "others" who I'll just say would know, telling me that my daughter will never be seated in front of her two biggest rivals, and a third is just behind. I said "why"? And the answer was two of the three were kids of the head of the committee and the third was the kid of the festival organizer, and my daughter was lucky to get a seat at all. I don't know what to believe. I know there is nepotism in music, but this is public school. Scores are kept secret. Judges are usually the same people on the four person committee, or work for them. We just want a realistic assessment! One year my daughter ended up playing all of the solos because once they got to rehearsal she was the only one capable! But this is eating into her confidence big time. She just doesn't know. It is interesting the local youth orchestra has picked her as first, two years running, and when there was a totally impartial judge from a different region my daughter was first. It's hard to say NYSSMA doesn't matter when it's telling you that you rank so low. One year in just all-county, the only feedback given, on the only form the judge used was "outstanding in every category excellent in one". That was literally it! No score! They took two oboes and not her. Two teachers kids. Her director felt horrible because listening to her he had already given her the music to practice the solo! That was jr high, same group of kids. Later that year she was chosen for an All-State Jr. High band adjudicated by outside judges, first seat again.</p>
<p>My daughter is frustrated and questioning her ability. It's affecting practice time. Be honest. Are we looking for scapegoats for low placements (despite high scores) or is it really "odd" this is only happening in local public school events? We were even told by a very trustworthy source the kid that has gotten first chair asked the local youth orchestra if my daughter was trying out. It was a public list, yes she was on it. Outside our area, this kid said " forget it, if I can't be first I'm not trying out". What does that say? The other two oboes with my daughter in youth orchestra aren't from our region.</p>
<p>Has anybody ever encountered anything like this? In my daughters positive moments, she says "I can learn from this, competition makes me better." On a bad day it's "if I can't be #1 here, how will I even be #10 anywhere else?" She is a junior in HS and confused. Her unmusical parents are wondering if she needs to explore other avenues. Is she overreacting? Undereacting? We are open to a GAP year of just music study but don't know if it's necessary or would help. She does wish she had more free time to enjoy HS. This has been hard for me to type. Her private teacher says her lessons show she's putting the work in, has the talent. At Potsdam last summer she was given excellent reviews by Anna Hendickson and provided with excellent contacts and resources. She was very outgoing at Potsdam, considered shy at home high school. Thoughts?</p>