Hi. I’m a college freshman who feels miserable and directionless about the future despite going to a good UC. I am a biology major was originally in the pre-med track but I realized that I am not good at science, especially Chemistry, and that I’m not sure if I even want to be a doctor when it’s hard work and I feel drained already. I have to work super hard just to maintain decent grades, and I never have free time anymore. What’s worse is I don’t even feel interested in the material that I have to work so hard to learn, so every day just feels draining.
Recently I reconnected with my high school classmates over a group chat we had together and we were talking about how college was going. I honestly thought that they would be feeling similarly to me: drained and overworked. But no… It was the complete opposite
They loved what they were learning! Every single person was excitably talking about their classes and textbooks while I had nothing good to say about mine! It was so shocking and eye-opening, that maybe being sleep-deprived and tired was not what’s “normal” in college, and maybe I’m simply not on the right path.
I don’t mean to be a bad person and envy them, but I couldn’t help but feel so bad that I was the only one in that class who was miserable. In the class we were in (English), I was the person who participated a lot and was quite good in the class, yet now in college I am the one with no direction. I loved English and what we learned, and yet now I am a totally different spectrum (STEM) and I hate it, but I want a stable career.
What should I do? Should I really evaluate my major and future and change to something I am happy in, or am I doing the smart thing by picking something that makes me unhappy, albeit will be stable?
It’s hard to give advice to someone on a forum. You need to be happy though with the direction you are pursuing. Sometimes it’s temporary unhappiness but if it’s fundamental you should consider switching majors to what makes you happy. I’d talk to your schools counselors and candidly with your parents. Don’t put others goals as your priority. School should be “I’m an overworked but excited to learn” feeling nit I’m dreading to go to class feeling.
you are not alone. I’m straight up not having a good time in college and it’s really tough to see friends posting about having the time of their lives. it’ll get better eventually. you should consider switching to studying something that interests you more. some courses will suck inevitably along the way but should focus on the job you could pursue with that degree and whether or not you’d want to work that job for 30+ years. your school probably has a career services center where you can learn about stable careers in other fields than STEM. they definitely exist. and any job should be stable if you’re good enough at it, right? I don’t know but best of luck.
You can have a satisfying and successful job without going into STEM. Study what interests you. You don’t need to have a career today. Your post couldn’t say more clearly that you are in the wrong field of study. Make no mistake, med school is a thousand times worse than where you are now, as a freshman.
So many students change their majors. Colleges expect this. The path to med school is not an easy one, nor should it be. Do your best to finish out the semester strong, and next semester, take classes that interest you. As you get deeper into what excites you, your career path will become more clear.
Don’t waste your youth being unhappy. You have to be proactive and make the changes you need to ensure your happiness as you go forward. Understand that it won’t suddenly materialize in one moment. And don’t fret about what you can’t change right now. As a freshman, you have plenty of time to figure out the next step.
Good news! you are only 1 semester in and there are so, so many pathways for you to choose from. You made what seemed like a sensible choice- and it didn’t work out as you expected. Hearing your friends talking about their experiences has helped you realize that you need to step back and re-evaluate. So do that thoughtfully
You are loathing pre-med Bio 101- a “weed out” class designed to push a boatload of info down your throat and cut down the numbers in the pre-med cohort. It doesn’t necessarily mean that all of STEM is a no-go area for you. So go back a few steps and think about what STEM classes you have enjoyed in the past: what did you like about them? (for ex, doing the lab work? learning how things work? specific teachers? etc) You mention that you thrived in English class: what specifically did you like about it (for ex, class size? the discussions? the actual material itself? etc). Talk to your advisor, the careers counseling center, your parents- even consider talking to teachers from HS- so that they can help you think through what fields or paths or subjects are truest to your interests. Talk through other near-term paths. Realize that the old ideas of ‘stable’ employment are changing really fast- and that your UG major is not your destiny: it’s how you shape it with other experiences / internships / etc. For example, if you are person happy at the border of humanities and STEM there are many ways to turn that into a very stable career. LOTS of people don’t follow a straight line path to their eventual career, but they learn something from each step that helps them choose the next step.
Seriously: well done you for recognizing a wake up call- now go do some hard thinking about what changes you would like to make!
Just a story. I started at Reed [many, many years ago] as a pre-med/math major. Chem 101 taught me I wasn’t cut out for med school. Finite Dimensional Vector Spaces taught me I wasn’t cut out for theoretical math. I found my path with Psych 101 and then ended up going to law school. Not where I thought I would end up when I started college, but I’ve loved my career. Best of luck to you. Lots of good advice up above. ATS
Thank you guys so much for all of the wonderful responses! I definitely think that after this quarter I am going to take classes in other fields to explore my choices. I really thought as a high schooler I would have a very solid pathway to a career without many twists and turns, so the idea of discovering my true passions and interests scare me, but I want really badly to be happy and satisfied with my choice like how my friends are.
I will definitely talk to my career counselor! I had an appointment with my health counselor about my anxiety regarding these issues, but I really think a career counselor will help more with my current situation
There is nothing wrong with twists and turns, and there is nothing wrong with taking time to figure out what you want to do/be when you grow up. And solid pathways to a career come in many flavors.
Tech companies need people who write well. Pharma companies need people who are good and empathetic managers. Biotech companies need people who have strong visual design skills. Robotics companies need people who can communicate with/cultivate investors. Hospitals need people who have strong supply chain/operations skills. Dialysis centers need people with strong marketing abilities. HMO’s need people who have studied psychology and can help figure out how to help patients comply with their doctors orders/take their meds as prescribed (millions of people do NOT take their meds as prescribed, and then wonder why they don’t get better. That costs insurance companies hundreds of millions of dollars a year).
If you love health care there are hundreds of careers that don’t involve medical school.
When you started college, you knew what, of the things you’d been exposed to, you liked. With this chance to explore, and in discovering what some of the things you liked at a high school level look like in college, you are likely to find new interests.
Few high school students have studied geology, anthropology, or linguistics (to name a few), but quite a few students graduate with degrees in these majors, presumably after having decided to give something new a try.
Can I suggest that as you try keeping a journal- in bullet form if it makes it less onerous - to record why you are enrolling in a class and what you do and don’t like about it each week? It’ll force you to give yourself some time to reflect, and you may see patterns. It also often helps establish links between things that, on the surface, seem unrelated.
It sounds like you are on your way. And good for you for recognizing this now – so much better than plowing ahead without a thought as to what actually excites you. Life is too short to be joyless!
Also keep in mind: You know how you are really feeling inside. But when you talk to your friends, you are just seeing what they want to show you. Maybe they really do like their classes, or maybe they just want to seem like they really like their classes.
Also how are they doing in their classes? Maybe everything is fine because they aren’t taking it that seriously?
Another thing to consider is that you don’t have to be a Bio major to be pre-med…you could major in English and take the pre-med classes as well.
Only you know your desire to practice medicine.
But I would guess about 10% of students who start as pre-med end up going to Med school…Is it Bio that gets you? Or Organic Chemistry? THe MCAT?
“I really thought as a high schooler I would have a very solid pathway to a career without many twists and turns”
Twists and turns are very, very common. The most successful people that I know have nearly all had quite a few of them – almost no one becomes wildly successful without a few dead ends and changes of direction on the way there.
Premed classes are definitely tough. I have heard multiple stories of freshman year biology classes mid term exams with class averages in the 40’s. There are however many other options as others have said. It does take a while to sort through them.
The pandemic makes all of this tougher.
“I am going to take classes in other fields to explore my choices.”
This is perfect.
I might add just to point out how wide the options are that I know several lawyers with bachelor’s degrees in science or engineering. One was a software engineer before going to law school. There are a lot of possible paths and it will take time to figure out which one is the right one for you.
You don’t mention the majors of your friends. Perhaps they’re in easy humanities programs in the College of Liberal Arts and have much more free time.
I read a lot of responses from the local experts urging you to follow your passions. Let me warn you; your world is much more competitive than mine. I know a guy who graduated in 1978 with a Music Theory degree. He’s a manager who oversees large mainframe software installations (like SAP). There was a time when any degree meant you had a good head on your shoulders and showed discipline.
Today, colleges have become profit centers that feed the sports-media complex. You didn’t mention your school, but most large universities use large freshman lectures to weed-out students from the upper-division courses. When I took Chem at UMass, there were six sections of 300 students. We all took the exams together on Thursday nights, occupying all the auditoriums on campus. They failed 60% every semester.
