So its only my second full day, but I’m already feeling horrible. I feel like all of the people in my class are entitled, I am getting really homesick, and I have just generally felt bad. I’ve made some friends and I’ve been going out to parties alot which, I’m not gonna lie, are very fun, but every 30 minutes or so I have this sharp realization that my parents, friends, and everything else that I am familiar with are gone and I break down. I also come from and have become very accustomed to a big city that is far away from Virginia, so being in Lexington is certainly a change of scenery that I’m not sure I can totally embrace. I also feel like everyone else here loves it and I’m the only one who is even remotely homesick. Is it possible that this is just homesickness and that I will eventually take on a more positive outlook of my time here, or is this a sign that I really am not in the right place. Please help me.
I suspect many of the other new students might feel the same as you do. Their outward happiness may be a bit forced to help them get over the jitters. You have undergone a big change of scenery, so accept that you will feel stresses and a bout of uncertainty.
Your job is to respect yourself and to do justice to your own interests and talents. By your admission at W&L, the school has recognized your outstanding qualities. You have a duty to permit yourself to pursue your own interests and goals. Find aspects of this new place that interest you and then pursue them. Only after a full year of hard efforts on your own behalf can you then judge whether W&L will work out over another three years.
Relax, be yourself, and discover what each other person there has to offer. There is something you can learn from each other student. In the process, you will learn more about yourself. You might even mention your doubts to others and, in the process, discover they feel the same. Thus: A new bond will be formed.
What @MinnesotaDadof3 said.
You’re right to recognize that this is a huge transition. Totally normal to feel homesick, and although you may not see it, many of the other first-years are having bouts of homesickness as well. Talk to your peer counselor. They are trained to listen and support you and can really help when you are struggling. Your faculty advisor, the department secretary, RUF or other religious group leader (whether or not you are religious), & financial aid advisor are other people who could help.
W&L is one of the most supportive communities around, but you may have to reach out to let someone know you need them (& on the off chance the first person isn’t helpful, keep going until you find someone who is). You may be surprised at graduation to realize that some of your biggest cheerleaders include a security officer or d-hall server. Learn the names of the people with whom you interact regularly (keep that speaking tradition going!); you are creating your village within the larger community.
Be sure you are eating well and working out to get some endorphins going. Go to office hours to develop a rapport with your profs. Stay busy. Look for people and groups who might need YOUR help, even if you aren’t sure you have much to offer right now. Create a routine that gets you into town – if you’ve always lived in a big city, life in Lex can be charming. A simple business transaction takes twice as long because the cashier/bank teller/whoever is likely to ask about your classes, weekend plans/hometown.
Please keep us posted. It feels overwhelming at the moment, but you can do this.
The most surprising thing I learned at my college reunions (different school) was how many of my classmates felt the same anxieties I did. They just hid them until they got adjusted and comfortable enough – AFTER graduation – to reveal them. Give it time.
This is a totally normal feeling - I was the same way last year, once classes get started you will probably start to feel a lot better. There are definitely other people who are feeling nervous and homesick. I’m still nervous about coming back and I’ll be a sophomore! It’s normal, but maybe for people like us, it hits harder. Try and make as many connections with people as possible, take care of yourself and get sleep. If you need someone to talk to, I’m on campus so don’t hesitate to let me know. Counseling is also a great resource I used last year and will probably continue to this year.
There are a lot of people who feel the same way as you that are just hiding it. Hang in there.
@mat324 I know that classes started yesterday. I am wondering (hoping) that you are feeling a little more comfortable. Please update!
I dropped my daughter off on Saturday and, she too, was miserable. And just like you she attended the parties. She liked that her classes have started - which helps keep her mind off of her friends from home and her (wonderful) mother 
(okay - and her brother and father!)
I got a text last night saying that she has made some friends and she realized that she was just homesick as it is getting easier and easier. I’m hoping the same for you!
I attended a different southern college (I am a Yankee) and felt very out of place my freshman year.
I ended up transferring to a northern college and at the time, was much happier.
In hindsight as an adult now, I realize I would likely have settled in and gotten used to the first college,
and grown to like it, had I stayed. Being a transfer student isn’t easy either, you can have an even worse problem potentially if you do, but then again, being older and more mature makes a huge difference. I would say my maturity made being a transfer student easier, less maturity made my first time away from home harder. Conclusion, things will get better if you make the effort, and staying or going you can make it work out either way, IMO.
Leave now, before pledgeship begins. Also, it will more beneficial to transfer sooner before your have any GPA to worry about. If you got into W&L, you should be able to get into the closest state school in your hometown, and possibly be able to negotiate some type of academic scholarship. If you are unhappy now, spending 4 years in Lexington will not be an easy thing. You can still attend local college at home, save a ton of money, and still attend law school, or other grad school. Most grad schools care more about GPA and LSAT/GMAT scores than what college you attended.
give it some time to make up your mind, but be assured that the fraternities will be trying to pull you in pretty soon. best to leave before that happens.
college is barely worth the cost these days. it certainly will not be worth the cost if the experience is not positive.
@SaveYourMoney, leaving now would cause OP to lose a semester (most state schools have been in session for three weeks or more, so new students are not likely to be admitted until spring term, much less negotiate an academic scholarship), not to mention lose any money already paid to W&L for tuition, room, & board for this fall.
Being homesick in the first days away from home is not a sign that the OP will be unhappy for four years in Lex. (OP hasn’t posted in a week, so he may well be feeling better, or at least is too busy to spend time on CC.) Part of what makes college worthwhile are the opportunities to develop as a person: to figure out solutions to problems, to decide what kind of person one is and wants to become, to take risks, fail, try something different, and succeed. As @blevine points out, you can make it work either way.
Leave after two days? This student is homesick – it is understandable, but hardly a reason to bail on the college.
I second what many have posted above. It is much too early to decide how you feel about the school. Everyone is different on what rate they adapt to their new surroundings. Last year my son as a first year was never homesick (we are from the West Coast). My daughter who attended a larger school came back after her first year and was never going back…by August she decided she wanted to go back. She went back and never looked back. She had a great college experience. Hang in there and give things a chance - you will probably end up being the Student Body President!
Two words for you: grow up. This might sound harsh, but welcome to the real world. You will not always be in places you enjoy, with people you enjoy. Wait it out, and if it is just so unbearable after the first semester, transfer.
^ Way to go with the timely advice.
OP - Did you get in the swing of things on campus? Are you still looking at transferring?
OP––I graduated two years ago and, I have no idea if you will see this, but I wanted to let you know that, if it hasn’t already, there is a really strong chance that it will get better. The biggest thing you can do is know that everyone is struggling and that talking to people about your struggles is the best thing you can do. My first semester I was absolutely miserable and I only made myself more miserable by failing to reach out to all of the amazing resources on campus. When I was finally forced to reach out to others because I was trying to transfer, I found my pledge class to be supportive and the professors I asked for rec letters to be fantastic––one literally emailed me every other day to check in and basically became a surrogate mother.
Please know that, I guarantee you, 85%+ are struggling. It is a very unique environment and at times uncomfortable and, yes, somewhat unwelcoming. If you ask around, you’ll be shocked by the number of people who considered transferring early in their time in Lexington and then ended up not wanting to leave at graduation. Not transferring was the best decision I ever made!