<p>I never got into fights. My area of expertise lies in getting other people to punch me. Then they get suspended and I'm a hero.</p>
<p>Personally if someone punched me, my first reaction wouldn't be to punch him/her back, but to RUN AWAY! But then again, I'm a girl, so a guy would probably have a different reaction. I'm guessing it's normal and even slightly excusable. However, the OP seems to think that him punching his "friend" was appropriate--which bothers me the most. Unless he's just trying to cover up his inability to control himself.</p>
<p>Let me see, someone who you mess around and horseplay with, throws a ball and it hurts, so in order to keep your self respect you break his nose </p>
<p>Consequentely, because you needed to "respect yourself" with"no other option" but to assualt someone, you are now suspended, can't do the senior trip, and are a wreck over college acceptances and if the 5 day suspension for violence will be reported to the colleges, and all because some guy that you get rough with sometimes, a mutual thing, btw, because he "grinned" and "smiled" at you after he threw the ball...how much self respect you got now that you are in this mess? was it worth all the fallout just so you can "feel better" about yourself by breaking someone's nose on purpuse not in self defense by any stretch and not because the guy was a bully and not because you were harrassed?</p>
<p>The person you slugged in the face, well, maybe he went too far....does that mean YOU go WAY beyond what any rational and reasonable person would do? And he went too far in a MUTUAL game of horsepley or messing around or whatever</p>
<p>If you attitude here in any way reflects your attitude to the GC about what happeneed, that you really aren't THAT sorry- remorse and realizing that what you did was wrong goes a long way with people wanting to help you, but if you say, well, he smiled at me so I slugged him, well, what do you think a person in authority might think of that...</p>
<p>I am being like this because as an adult, like the very people who will be deciding your fate, you need to see how many, if not most adults see your actions. yes, some say, well, I can sort of understand it, but when you are talking about a school environment, a college that cannot nor will not tolerate violence, you need to check your attitude about your actions</p>
<p>Having some here go, yeah, you go does not help your situation...being told that slugging someone is not that big a deal, (when obviouslly it is, otherwise you wouldn't be suspended) doesn't help your cause</p>
<p>What might help your cause is realizing that hitting your playmate and breaking his face was not called for, was done out of pure anger and pride, and that you admit you shouldn't have done it.</p>
<p>Go to any trial, without contrition, you don't get paroled or maybe a lighter sentence...attitude counts for a lot with those in power, so think about that before you try and fix this mess you are in</p>
<p>"I'll say it again: if I let that hit go without doing any sort of revenge on him, I would never be able to respect myself."</p>
<p>In time I hope you will learn that you will respect yourself more for not throwing the punch.</p>
<p>And for those keeping score, I am a man.</p>
<p>dad here, and I hope that the OP's acceptances are rescinded. </p>
<p>There is a HUGE difference, MOWC, between fighting in elementary-middle school (practially still wet behind the ears) and fighting at age 18, i.e., legal adult, supposedly ready to attend college. Moreover, I'm a big dodgeball fan and find it really HARD to believe that the OP was physically (not his manhoold) hurt by being hit in the face with such a ball, particularly since his eyeglasses did not break. If the force wasn't stong enough to break his eyeglasses....and, I noticed that the suspension is five full days. Obviously, the school did not feel that the provocation was that big.</p>
<p>And btw, Fred, I did grow up in the 'hood, used to have your attitude, but matured, and taught my kids better.</p>
<p>"However, I have to say that I am sympathetic to the OP. Getting hit in the head purposely by some idiot is probably the least tolerable of all physical assaults."</p>
<p>Ya gotta be kidding me. I know that I've been purposely hit in the head with dodgeballs. It's silly. It hurt. It's also a part of being a kid. I didn't need to punch anyone over it.</p>
<p>And there certainly are far worse physical assaults. One example is having one's nose broken by a punch.</p>
<p>This guy is not my "playmate". I have never pushed him or threw something lightly at him. I never touch the guy. I guess my relationship with him is all verbal. Up until yesterday, he did not push or throw something at me. I believe he actually tried to start something with me yesterday for some apparent reason. And I reacted. You could see that he wanted to get me angry with the way he was grinning.</p>
<p>I think your biggest problem here is not admitting that YOU ARE WRONG</p>
<p>I AM wrong. I am just saying that my punch is somewhat justifiable. I should have calmed down before, but I was not thinking at all. Look, no one ever hit me in the face like that, and so I did not know how to react. This is the first time since GRADE school that I got into trouble. It would be really unfair if my admissions were revoked just because of a single situation that I did not handle well.</p>
<p>^well i agree it would ><</p>
<p>StrawberryMayo -</p>
<p>What you still don't seem to get is that Jesus, Gandhi, and MLK would all tell you that it takes MORE of a man to handle it non-violently, than violently.</p>
<p>It is time you grew into a man.</p>
<p>"And btw, Fred, I did grow up in the 'hood, used to have your attitude, but matured, and taught my kids better."</p>
<p>I don't think Fred or the OP grew up in the hood. If this is what it sounds like, this is some school in the suburbs where you don't have to worry that some kid is going to come back to school with a shotgun (assuming the kid isn't walking around in a trenchcoat.) </p>
<p>I think the key here is moderation. In the hood maybe you have to guard against getting caught up in the macho mentality that you must fight if anyone disrespects you. If you're some kid on the math team in some posh suburb, maybe you need to react physically once in awhile to a bully. That's all I'm trying to say. </p>
<p>If the OP felt he needed to respond physically, a smarter reaction would have been throwing a ball at the guy's head at point-blank range. It would have been harder to suspend the OP for that. Once you throw a punch and it's not obviously in self-defense, you basically have to be suspended. Had the OP stayed in a gray area, he probably wouldn't have been suspended.</p>
<p>Another point: the social rules for males and females are different. There is no social consequence for not fighting if you are a female. In fact, if you respond to someone, people will probably look down on you. Things are different if you are male. If someone punches you in the face or, yes, hits you with a dodgeball in the face at point-blank range and it's clearly on purpose, and you just act like it's ok, then it invites other bullies to do the same. Let's not get bogged down in whether getting hit with a dodgeball in the head is equivalent to throwing a punch. I think it can be if it's clearly on purpose and at close range; others disagree.</p>
<p>Most often if you stand up to someone once, then other likeminded people don't challenge you again. Like I said before, if you're in a dangerous area, then just take it. You don't want some gangbanger shooting up your house or something.</p>
<p>
[quote]
There is no social consequence for not fighting if you are a female.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Huh? There certainly is in SoCal and, as a result, the girls fight much harder than the boys. :)</p>
<p>I have to agree with bluebayou one point, I've seen girls fight much harder than the boys, but not physically. They spread nasty rumors about each other, call each other sluts, and all this behind their backs. You tell a school official, they won't do anything because a) it's easy to lie about stuff like that and b) they are Daddy's little princess. Something might not even be done even when it's too late, like when someone commits suicide. (Look up the story of the 13 year old girl who committed suicide because of a Myspace prank-nothing is being done to the parents) Personally, I think that kind of fighting is far worse than breaking a nose.</p>
<p>Oh, and for the OP- I'd act very apologetic about the whole incident when speaking with your GC. Even if you aren't remorseful, learning how to fake your way out of a sticky situation is a lesson everyone needs to learn.</p>
<p>This wasn't a bullying or gossip girl situation, this was two guys who "mess around" and one took it "too far", and smiled about it....</p>
<p>I agree, its ALL bad, but that still doesn't justify it</p>
<p>ANd faking it may get you out of trouble, but you mature enough to act like a civilized adult....</p>
<p>We tolerate this from a 5 year old, why is it okay for an HS senior></p>
<p>citygirlsmom is clearly the other kid's mother. This is so obvious.</p>
<p>Everything she's said in attempt to accuse the OP of his savage retaliation could in every single way be applied to the dodgeball thrower. </p>
<p>So you know that logic is missing when a sentence said by someone can so easily be spun around.</p>
<p>Throwing ball into glasses = not a good time, plus high chance of shattered glass = blindness. Punching kid in cheek because he's laughing at the situation = not a good idea, but worst case scenario is broken nose.</p>
<p>exactly what i was thinking special agent </p>
<p>citygirlsmom this is rediculous give it a break</p>
<p>My advice to the original poster is to walk away from this post! It's just going to keep fueling your anger about the situation. Cool down for a couple of days and then talk to your GC and see if it will be reported. If it is try to send a letter and sound apologetic. If it isn't sincere, the college probably will revoke the acceptance. If that happens, sorry, but it's a hard lesson learned. We've all made stupid decisions trying to mature. Hopefully you're a good kid that made a bad choice and will get a little smarter the next time around. Good luck to you!</p>
<p>You can call me ridiculous, but realize this....I am an adult, a mother, and just the age of many of the people that will be deciding the OPs fate</p>
<p>If you think I am reeddiiiccuulous, know that the vast majority of adults will feel as I do...and if we heard about some kid breaking a kids nose who wasn't really that sorry about it, and was suspended, (isn't there something in those acceptances about that) I might give that applicant a hmmmmmm....is this a good bet here?</p>
<p>So sure, ignore me, tell me to go away, but you need to know that it WILL be people, adults, who want safe environments as much as possible</p>
<p>Imagine if the OP reacts like this once again in his dorm, and it comes out he had a past of violence with little remorse who thinks its okay to break noses for smiling....</p>
<p>Call me whatever you need to, doesn;t take away the fact that the OPs "fate" is in people like me, the very ones who suspended hims, in their hands- obvisoully, the OPs school thinks more along my train of thought that the people who say, go ahead, punch away</p>
<p>I may be completely wrong on this- but I vaguely remember there being a law that you get a lighter sentence or something if your reaction is in the heat of the moment/within a certain amount of time of the original incident?</p>
<p>Of course, this is on a much smaller scale, but I think since the OP has admitted he's wrong; since it's somewhat understandable (though I definitely don't agree with his actions- don't jump down my throat); and as this is his only offense, there really isn't a need to over do it. As others have said, explain yourself and hope for the best.</p>