<p>I can definitely sympathize. I’m a gay guy who is a member of a non-gay fraternity (i.e. not Sigma Epsilon Omega) at Berkeley. While it’s easy to meet sorority girls, it’s much harder to meet gay guys. I still haven’t figured out a good way to expand my network, but here are some things that I have figured out.</p>
<p>My understanding is that QARC meetings are not geared towards hardcore activism, but instead have a large social aspect. Same with QSA meetings. While they do present opportunities to be active, I don’t think they force it down your throat. I encourage you to stop by and see what those organizations are like before you write them off. However I’ve never been able to attend the QARC meetings, so take what I say with a grain of salt.</p>
<p>As others mentioned, Oscar Wilde throws parties every now and then. I’ve been to a few, they are a blast. You can meet new friends or, if so inclined, find a guy to take home for the night. I don’t know when the next one is, but I encourage you to go.</p>
<p>Berkeley also has a gay fraternity called Sigma Epsilon Omega. You can find their website [url=<a href=“HugeDomains.com”>http://sigmaepsilonomega.com/]here[/url</a>]. They are planning a trip to an 18+ gay club in the city for the night of March 3. If you want to go, there’s information on their website. Even if you don’t know anyone, I expect they would still be more than happy to have you along. Although you may be more comfortable if you go with a friend who already knows them. Look through your network to see if anyone you know is coming along. I was surprised by the number of girls I knew who regularly hung out with SEO members.</p>
<p>Certain types of parties are also more likely to attract gays. When you talk about the fraternity parties not being gay-friendly, is that based upon what you’ve heard or what you’ve experienced? I’ve personally had zero experience with homophobia in the Greek system. That includes a handful of times when I have interacted with other gay guys at fraternity parties. No one even batted an eye. So if you’re worried about discrimination, don’t be. If you have experienced discrimination at a fraternity before, then please PM me with details so that I can get in touch with them and make sure it stops.</p>
<p>From my experience, fraternity parties generally don’t attract many gay guys. However you’ll usually find a few gay guys at each fraternity party. It’s just harder to recognize them since they don’t typically act stereotypically gay. I don’t have much advice on calibrating your gaydar; mine is terrible. I only can recognize them because I’ve met them before. Coop parties tend to attract more gay guys than fraternity parties. Also you’ll find a larger number of gay guys who act stereotypically gay, making it easier to find them. So try hitting up the coop parties.</p>
<p>You should also look into your network. Let your friends know that you are interested in meeting gay guys. I’ve been surprised at how many of my friends are eager to play matchmaker.</p>
<p>Finally, there are a number of online outlets available to you. If you want to hook up, sites like Adam4Adam and Manhunt are available. (Those sites are not safe for work by the way) If you are looking for relationships, sites like OkCupid would be a better choice. One of my friends is working with a start-up called ■■■■■■■■■■■■ which has a few UC Berkeley gay guys on there, so you can try it too.</p>
<p>So to summarize the main points of all of this:
- Attend a QARC or QSA meeting.
- Go to coop parties, especially Oscar Wilde ones.
- Look into SEO’s events, including their March 3rd gay club trip.
- Use your network, your friends probably know gay guys.
- Try some sites geared towards gay guys.</p>
