<p>So my freshmen year I brought a bottle of alcohol to school and was suspended for 10 days.
Also my sophomore year I was suspended for a fight and was suspended for 3 days.
How is this going to affect my chances and I really need help going about writing my explanation.
I sincerely regret both and I feel so stupid for even being involved with these two things. Please help!!!! </p>
<p>Hard to say how it will affect your chances. What kinds of schools do you plan to apply to? Have you asked your guidance counselor for help in how to handle this?</p>
<p>Generally when a student has this type of trouble, it is best to add some extra really safe colleges where your stats are on the high end and you know you can afford them. </p>
<p>Where do you intend to put your explanation? In the Common App ‘additional information’ section? Or in a separate letter to admissions that you ask be considered along with your application? It doesn’t sound like you have much to say except that you feel stupid and you regret them. If I were an admissions officer, I would want to know if you have changed your behavior, made any restitution, gotten involved in any activities to try to help other students avoid the same situations, etc. Those might be things to include. But before you decide to include anything, I would talk to your guidance counselor and see what he/she recommends for how to handle it.</p>
<p>Restitution is the word. What was done is going to be there and you cannot get rid off. I can say it will have profound effect in a competitive situation. Regret will not do you any good, write about restitution may help.</p>
<p>I got in to a fight in college and when I applied for RA, it was brought up and I was not selected.</p>
<p>My first choice school is Worcester State and I really want to major in nursing, and I putting this explanation on the common app under writing it asks if you have ever been suspended and if so you have to write and explanation. I wrote this. Can you give me feedback:
Dear Admission Officers, </p>
<p>Unfortunately, I was suspended twice for my foolish mistakes. First I violated my schools alcohol policy my freshmen year. Which resulted in a 10 day suspension. I entirely regret this because as soon as my mother walked into the office to pick me up, I broke down. I could just see how disappointed she was in me and I never wanted to see her like that ever again. The second time I was suspended was because I got into an altercation with another student. The punishment for this was a 3 day suspension. I feel horrible for this because it was immature of me to antagonize the situation. I wish I just walked away, and I still regret my decision to this day. I know there is no excuse for my mistakes, but I have truly learned from them. I am fully committed to remaining good standing with my parents and with any school I attend </p>
<p>Well, I was afraid that you were aiming at Nursing programs at Columbia, Upenn or Duke. You may get by with a State School.</p>
<p>The passage you have does not related to restitution, you may want to reconsider.</p>
<p>Do your state colleges even require disclosure on their applications? My older son had some serious disciplinary infractions, which had to be included on his common app and in the counselor’s letter, but our state flagship university (well-respected; accepted him) had its own application, and they did not ask him about disciplinary actions. Many state colleges and universities do not ask for school letters, either. </p>
<p>Can you come up with something more than an “I feel terrible” defense? Have you stopped drinking altogether as a result of your mistake? (If not, don’t say so…). Have you joined any groups to control your own alcohol use or keep others from using? Have you tried to use your influence with friends to keep them from making the same mistakes? Just saying you feel bad because your mom is disappointed doesn’t say how you have changed your behavior. </p>
<p>I would possibly say that you know you were immature and foolish, and have matured and grown. If you do walk away from altercations now, say so (but don’t say it if it isn’t true…).</p>
<p>You can hope that your GC has seen growth and a commitment to change in you – if they say so in their recommendation, it could help.</p>
<p>If I was an adcom, I’d have to wonder exactly how much you regretted making your mom disappointed in you as a freshman since you got suspended again as a sophomore. I agree with other posters: get advice from your guidance counselor and try to pinpoint concrete steps you’ve taken to improve yourself or raise awareness in others as a result of both incidents. </p>
<p>Can you get a copy of your school record in regard to both events? What did they say, or did they just suspend you?</p>
<p>What the school will say about it may affect what you should say about it. Was it only you, or were there others involved? Did they document why you were in a fight (did someone hit you first or was there documented verbal abuse by the other party beforehand)?</p>
<p>The letter you wrote about your two suspensions is not in proper English. Make sure someone can review it for you. Maybe okay for posting on CC, but you want to treat it as a very important document.</p>
<p>FWIW, if you were at a HS that was pretty tough, that has serious issues with behavior and so on, you may not get as much flak about your suspensions. If you were at a suburban HS and the only bad actor in a school of perfect kids, that might not get as much tolerance.</p>
<p>IMHO, if they ask if you were suspended and why, you could put: “I was suspended for ten days for violating school policy freshman year. I was suspended for three days for violating school policy sophomore year. I understand why I was punished and have turned myself around since then.”</p>
<p>Do you really have to mention alcohol and fighting? And also, if both were “zero-tolerance” related, like some of my son’s suspensions were (he pulled the ID tag of his aide, and that violated the zero-tolerance for violence school policy), you could list that. Sometimes that gets sympathy.</p>
<p>You’re right to be concerned. Is there anything in your bio to suggest you have addressed the behavior you exhibited (two student behaviors with which colleges are genuinely concerned) are no longer that impulsive person you were? It might be a good idea, if your parents can afford it, for you to gain the advice of a college advisor who has experience with high school students who’ve made poor decisions behaviorally. </p>
<p>You need a better story. No adult believes that the one time you got caught doing something wrong is the only time you ever did that thing. Even if it’s true, it’s going to be a hard sell.</p>
<p>These two keywords can make the world of difference:</p>
<p>“Peer pressure.”</p>
<p>Now take that and run with it. Good luck!!!</p>
<p>I don’t see how that helps. Because if the OP was susceptible to peer pressure for those two incidents, what is to say that they won’t be now for other things? And all their other peers didn’t get suspended for these types of things (my kids didn’t). And it pushes responsibility off on other people. I would totally stay away form the concept of peer pressure. You did it, own it.</p>
<p>Well explain how peer pressure got you doing the stupid things, and then say BUT I take full responsibility. Explain how you have turned yourself around since then.</p>
<p>That is still blaming somebody else… still a bad idea. You can’t say “peer pressure made me do it” AND “I take full responsibility”. Which is it? </p>
<p>Both. Some teens do bad things because of peer pressure. Some of us had been there, done that, and we understand. It doesn’t mean OP can’t say: “Still, I understand that is not an excuse, and that’s why I take full responsibility for my actions.”</p>
<p>I am willing to bet some of the adcoms did more than just “bring a bottle of alcohol” to school. They’ll understand when OP mentions peer pressure.
lol</p>
<p>Auto incorrect.
oops: some of us have been there.</p>
<p>I think blaming their actions on peer pressure is a mistake for kids who are filling out college apps. Taking full responsibility for their actions is the first step to gaining the maturity and wisdom not to repeat them. In my opinion, placing blame on others is likely to work against them.</p>
<p>Ad coms are adults. They are now pretty far away from that, and trying to figure out if a student has good enough judgement to be admitted to their school. Sure, teens and college students may think it is a valid excuse. It doesn’t wash nearly as well with adults, and shouldn’t be brought up in this situation. At least not if the OP wants their statement to be taken seriously as an admission of responsibility and change.</p>