<p>Thanks for the understanding, SBmom!</p>
<p>Sybbie, sounds like you have a lot of info about Paulchem's D's school and its tendencies. You and bluealien are right that you can't really force anyone to do anything; you can't even necessarily "lead the horse to water" if it does not want to go. Sounding the possibility of the gap year might let the pressure off so that the DD does not have to push off by refusing to look at schools. I like that thought.</p>
<p>I don't see why paulchem should not initiate a fun trip with DD (the idea of a friend is optional but when my dad did this with me, he included my friend and it made the whole trip more appealing.) You are the parent and you can give this a try!</p>
<p>My D was hard to get started-- I had to be pretty proactive at the beginning. Then, once she was rolling, everything was fine. </p>
<p>My D had a big anxiety breakdown in about October about leaving home in general. As a kid D had major problems with transitions (she was a child of divorce who hated the back & forth between homes) and the whole senior year is essentially spent 'being neither here nor there.' This process called up a lot of old feelings about loss, belonging, attachments, etc. Once they were sorted through things got a lot better.</p>
<p>I really think you can try a few more things to get her started. If things don't gel by December app due dates, THEN you can consider the gap year plan.</p>
<p>SBMom,</p>
<p>This is an aside . . .My kids have also had to go back and forth for the last eight years. I have been thankful that they have survived that process. One interesting aspect of going to college for my daughter that she LOVED was being able to have all of her stuff in one place and not having to haul it back and forth. She has helped S1 look at this in a positive light as well, though I think he is more of a homebody than she, and the transition will be a little tougher. Glad things have sorted themselves out for your D!</p>